


Say I Love U

by nikatsu



Category: DBSK|Tohoshinki|TVXQ, So Nyuh Shi Dae | Girls' Generation, Super Junior
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-10
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2017-12-23 00:02:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 65,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/919618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nikatsu/pseuds/nikatsu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a story about a boy who refuses to speak and a girl who has an unusual proposition.     [Created on Jan 27, 2011; still on-going.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Patient Kim Hyunjin, age 16 and diagnosed with the flu, has been requested to have her blood tests redone. Something about the white blood cells being to low for her age, and the something-chloride being too high." The nurse said, shrugging as she put a bundle of paper onto the counter.

A young woman looked up, swiveling her seat from the computer to have a look at the paper on the table. She wore a stark white laboratory coat over her wine red blouse and black skirt with her name ( _Im Yoona, 3rd year Seoul Medical University_  in small, block letters) pinned on the left breast pocket. She read it silently – turning over the pages delicately, before raising an eyebrow a moment later and shaking her head.

_Hyoyeon messed up again_ , she thought – rolling her eyes as her eyes fell on a misplaced period in the paper. Turning back to her computer, Yoona sighed as a program loaded in front of her.

"The results are correct but the decimal points were moved when it was typed. I'll re-print this and send it back up to your station." She said, waving the nurse off as the latter nodded and started towards the door. A few seconds later, the printer hummed into life as it reprinted the document and Yoona cleared her throat. With a hand on her waist, she marched into the laboratory and called, "Kim Hyoyeon!"

"You rang?" A voice called from behind a refrigerator, before a petite woman (dressed in a lab coat too and hot pink pumps) came out wearing a smile on her face. Yoona let out a deep sigh as her friend blinked curiously at her. "OK, what did I do now?"

"Unnie, you typed the results wrong again. That's the third time today!" she said, folding her arms across her chest and frowning. She waved the stack of papers at her friend's face and sighed again. "It's bad enough that the doctors are rushing us to finish their lab requests, but we can't waste time reprinting results we already sent out too."

Hyoyeon took the papers into her hand and skimmed them. "Oops," she said when she saw the misplaced dots she had typed before and smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, Yoona. You know I'm not very good with computers right?"

"Aigoo, don't give me that face." Yoona complained exasperated but smiling. "Next time leave the typing to me, OK? It was a good thing none of the elder staff got wind of this or else you're screwed."

"Thank goodness for their old age that they have to leave early." She agreed, nodding her head. She took a seat in one of the chairs and took a deep breath. "It's also a good thing that the younger staffers are all too afraid of us to say anything too. Maybe it's because today's our last day here."

"That's because you inject kids with needles so mercilessly, Hyo." Yoona said, smirking. She burst out laughing when she replied by sticking out her tongue. "Hyoyeon-choding, don't ever change."

"It's our last day as interns though... do you and lover-boy have any plans tonight?" Hyoyeon asked, wiggling her eyebrows and grinning. Yoona threw a wad of tissue paper at her and rolled her eyes, her cheeks tinted pink. "You're horrible, unni and we're going to dinner like we do every night since we've started dating," she replied, a smile clear across her face.

"Goodness, the two of you date as if you're both logging in for a shift!" The older exclaimed, shaking her head while laughing. She leaned closer to her friend and pouted. "I don't know if it's cute or just plain sad. The two of you really need to be more romantic."

Yoona waved a hand in front of her face and wrinkled her nose. "We're romantic enough, unni. That's all that matters. Besides, shouldn't you be toning down the romance between you and Eunhyuk-oppa? I've heard too many sexy voice messages on your machine whenever I come over."

Hyoyeon shrugged her shoulders. "Hey, my man's a very sexual being. I can't help it if we do well in that department and you don't." she teased, earning a slap on the shoulder from her already-too-red cheeked friend. "Don't be a prude, Yoong. I've been in your position too, and I only got over it after I started dating Eunkyuk when I met him at the subway. Who knows? You could meet your one true love at someplace vague too!"

"Donghae is my one true love, unni." Yoona argued, "and I am not a prude. I'm... just not ready."

"Not ready? Or not sure with your partner?" Hyoyeon countered, earning another slap on the shoulder. She laughed as she rubbed the sore part and nudged Yoona with an elbow. "Don't say I didn't tell you though."

Yoona laughed as well, shaking her head as she pulled her into a side hug. "Aigoo. Let's not talk about this anymore, ok? It's already five in the afternoon and I have to meet Donghae early so I can check up on my dad before visiting hours are over. Could you log my card out for me, unni?" Hyoyeon nodded and watched her pull off her lab coat and fold it neatly into her bag. "And please don't tell Eunhyuk what we talked about here... he talks to Donghae and that'll just be weird."

"You have to live a little, Yoona!" Hyoyeon said as she began to walk towards the door, "One day, I promise you, you'll know what I mean!"

Yoona rolled her eyes at her statement and said nothing as she stepped out of the laboratory. Pulling out a cellphone from her pocket, she quickly typed in a message without looking around her... and as luck would have it, she found herself sitting on her bottom on the floor and looking up to a man who's expression didn't match to the look of surprise on hers.

He was tall and lean, towering over her with a non-descript expression on his face as he looked at her. The black jacket he wore fit his broad shoulders loosely and was in contrast with the slightly fitted white shirt he wore inside. Slowly, he went down on one knee and began to pick up the wads of paper that fell off her bag and folders without a word and handed them to her. "Thank you," she whispered, blinking curiously at him as he stood up slowly and held out his hand. She stared at his open palm for a moment before realizing it was meant for her. Yoona sheepishly took it and stood up carefully, dusting her skirt clumsily as she did so.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." She said, bowing apologetically at the man in front of her. He nodded, patting off a small patch of dust on her shoulders blouse and then bowed as well before continuing down the hall and into the elevator.

Yoona watched him walk away, wondering why her cheeks warmed for a moment before her cellphone beeped.

[ I'll meet you there. See you. ] The screen said, and Yoona sighed--resuming her walk and consequently putting her wonders (and warm cheeks) to rest.

 

* * *

 

"How is your work treating you these days?" She asked the moment he walked into the door and dragged his feet. She leaned back and waited patiently as he took out a board and quickly wrote down a response.

/ It's fine. / The board read, and Sooyoung sighed--shaking her head as she pushed back against a pillow and he sat down on a chair right next to her bed. She was slightly pale under the cream white of her patient clothes, but looked fine nonetheless with the constant smile on her face. "You only have to arrange the albums back into place, right? Meanwhile Yuri does all the talking." She said, tilting her head to the side. "I hope you haven't thought about wringing her neck with that blabbermouth of hers. Shim Changmin, It's not nice to kill your adoptive sisters you know."

She was six when her parents adopted a surly 14-year old Shim Changmin into their lives. Sooyoung had only begun to accept Yuri as a sister when she had been adopted two years before he came along. He hadn't changed much from then--but he at least spoke once or twice a day back then, and his words were always interesting to hear. He was a protective brother, albeit his stoic demeanor and unwillingness to speak. Still, they had always felt safe with him...

/ She's busy with Minho, so it's okay. / Changmin shrugged, raising an eyebrow. He quickly added another statement under the sentence. / How are you feeling? /

"You should just talk – it'd be easier to understand you if I didn't have to wait for you to write it down," she complained, pouting. When all she received in response was a blank face, Sooyoung sighed once again, loudly this time and nodded. "I'm doing a lot better than last time you were here. The cute doctor assigned to me has helped a lot. A little eye-candy never hurt." She said, grinning cheekily.

He rolled his eyes and shook his head at her, but let a small smile creep into his face for a moment. / You should think about getting better first before flirting. / He wrote, shooting her a look, / you'd have better luck if you were standing upright and not just lying in a heap. /

"Writes the man who's not had a relationship in years and has never spoken since... practically forever!" Sooyoung exclaimed, pushing him with a hand on the shoulder playfully. "I can flirt well in any position, brother. Your sister's pretty hot you know."

She laughed when he made a face and rolled his eyes again. She breathed in deeply, letting her dimples deepen beneath her smile and tapped his arm softly. "I miss hearing your voice, Changmin. It's been too long, don't you think?"

"Neither of them is ever going to come back. You should be over it by now... I mean, Yuri and I are." She watched his face for any sign of emotion--but none came to pass. Sooyoung sighed, shrugging her shoulders.  _No response as always_ , she thought watching his eyes wander beyond her. "Well, can't say I didn't try again today."

"But I promise you, one day, you'll find something you'd be willing to break your promise for."

Changmin considered her words, letting his mind drift aimlessly to an image of a woman looking up to him from the floor and then nodded--erasing it in his head as he patted her hand slightly. / Want a pie or something? / he wrote, offering her a slight lopsided smile and ignoring her curious expression. He stood up without waiting for her to respond, letting the door hang open and his adoptive sister wondering.

 

* * *

 

Yoona waited patiently in one of the tables inside a cozy, little restaurant three blocks away from the hospital. She glanced at her watch, quickly calculating the time she had left to meet her boyfriend and get back to visit her father. If she had enough luck for the day, maybe she could even convince him to visit her father with her... He had always said he wanted to see who made her daughter smile...

Her mind wandered briefly to an image of a helping hand from earlier and she blushed, shaking her head.  _Thinking about some random guy, honestly Yoona..._

"Yoona." A voice called, and a smile formed across her face as she looked up and saw the man who accompanied the voice. She stood up, kissing him chastely on the cheek as a greeting. Lee Donghae only smiled in response and sat across from her.

"How was your day?" he asked, briskly opening the menu and skimming it. Yoona's brow wrinkled as she noted his fidgeting behavior and put a hand on his.

"Are you okay?" She squeezed his hand softly, looking into his eyes, "You seem nervous."

Donghae laughed, a slightly sad sound that surprised her because she knew he was not the kind of person to be sad. He was sunshine and laughter when they met a year ago and each day he made her feel wanted and secure. Donghae was a smile she could always count on to see.  _However, today seems to prove otherwise_ , Yoona mused staring at him. He took her hand inside his and looked at it – careful not to look at her eyes and face and kissed it.

"I have something to confess. And you're not going to like it." He started, his voice low and strained. Yoona felt her heart grow heavy and she moved her hand away. He didn't grab it back or look at her as she did. "I'm sorry, Yoona... but..."

"I'm seeing someone else."

 

* * *

 

There was a figure sitting on one of the benches outside the hospital entrance when Changmin walked back carrying food and water. He tilted his head, straining to place where he had seen that red blouse before and the mess of hair it had accompanying it. [  _Quickly I'm learning to love again..._  ] He pressed 'Stop' on his mp3 when he realized the figure was crying and took another step closer. He froze when she looked up at him with tear-stained cheeks.

"Oh, it's you," she whispered, hastily wiping away at her cheeks with her hands. Her fingers trembled as she tried to open the clasp of her bag and failed miserably. New tears seemed to form under eyes as she fought them away and blew at her hands to warm them. "Sorry."

_The girl from before_ , he thought, settling down on a seat apart from her. She took no notice of him and continued on trying to open her bag but to no avail. Changmin watched her sigh in annoyance and give up, lowering her head and letting out a new batch of tears. He looked around tensely, waving off the people staring at her to move along--and then turned his attention back to her.  _Why am I here?_  He asked himself as the woman next to her continued to cry softly. Changmin glanced at her again, watched her figure tremble and her hair float around her tear-stained cheeks...  _Oh, to hell with it_. His eyes softened as he brought one of his earphones to her ear and pressed 'Play'.

[  _It's gonna hurt when it heals too / It'll all get better in time_  ]

Yoona blinked, raising her head as the song played on in her ear. She looked at the man sitting next to her and blinked at him. He was looking straight ahead, watching the street fill with people that walked past them and said nothing, bobbing his head slightly to the music. [  _I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to / It'll all get better in time_  ]

"Thank you..." she whispered, wiping her cheek as the song's words sunk in. He shrugged, reaching to his side to offer her a water bottle. Tentatively, Yoona took it and shot him a grateful half-smile.

'Yoona, it gets better in time...' He seemed to say as their eyes met for the second time this day. Without a word, he stood up as the song ended and bowed to her slightly before heading inside the hospital again. She sighed, taking a swig of water and wiping her mouth.

"It gets better in time."

 

* * *

 

"Yoona... I was starting to think you wouldn't come today." A voice said, his tone friendly and loving as she entered the room quietly. Yoona took a deep breath and turned around to face her father with a smile. "I thought you'd have left your old man all alone." He pouted, reaching out to her with a hand that she gladly took.

Mr. Im had been in the hospital for two years now--battling acute myeloid leukemia with a brave face. Yoona remembered the day she found him bleeding from the nose on the floor one sunny day and tried to quench the fear bubbling inside of her once again that she might not see him again in the morning.

"Don't be such a drama queen, Dad." She said airily, wrinkling her nose as cutely as she muster. She hoped in the back of her mind that her father wouldn't notice the slight puffiness of her eyes. She squeezed his hand reassuringly. "I got held back from work, you see. Hyoyeon-unni had some typographical mistakes and I had to fix them."

He laughed, nodding his head. "Ah yes. I remember Hyoyeon telling us at a dinner once how much she hated computer functions." Mr. Im gave his daughter's hand a squeeze back, bringing it to his lips slowly and smiled. "You'll be alright when I'm gone, won't you Yoona?"

"Don't say stuff like that--" Yoona argued, giving him a mock-slap on the shoulder. Tears threatened to come to her eyes once again and she breathed in deeply. "You're going to be fine. You've been able to stay as long as two years. You can do a little more."

"I just want to make sure you'll be okay. How is that boyfriend of yours anyway? I haven't met him yet..." Yoona laughed meekly, shrugging cutely for effect. Mr. Im laughed again, brushing a hand on her cheek. "I hope I could meet him and see you happy before I go."

Just then the door opened and revealed an elderly man dressed in a laboratory coat and glasses. Yoona stood up and bowed in greeting. "Doctor Park," she said, smiling at the elder man. He gave her a smile in response and motioned for her to follow him outside. She obliged and steadied herself to what she might hear. "Is anything wrong?"

"Your father has decided on spending his days at home instead of the hospital. He says he'd rather die at the home he built than in a furnished hospital room." He said, pushing back his glasses with a finger. Yoona frowned, crossing her eyes against her chest. "I knew you would disagree, but your father's words are final."

"When did he decide this, doctor?"

He sighed, putting a hand on her shoulder comfortingly. "I'm sad to tell you this but your father hasn't got much time left. His blood tests have not shown any signs of repair and he says that he's no longer willing to respond to treatment if he continues to stay here." The doctor handed her a file and shrugged. "There's not much I can do for him here if he doesn't want my help."

"So you suggest that I bring him home? What if he gets worse?" she argued, shaking her head as she flipped through the papers. The elderly man looked at her wearily. "There's no guarantee that he'll get better--but he'll be happier at home than anywhere else. You know that's true."

He left without another word, leaving Yoona to shake her head once more before turning back to look at her father looking at her. "You're insane," she said, frowning at him from the door. He grinned.

"I know. So when do I meet this boyfriend of yours?"

Yoona laughed despite herself, looking away and leaning back against the doorframe. Her eyes trailed across the room and blinked when someone familiar stepped into view in front of her. She stood up straighter as an idea popped into her head.  _Live a little_ , she thought remembering her friend's earlier words.  _With my father's condition worsening, I might as well._

She looked back at her father and blew him a kiss. With a grin, Yoona pulled her bag onto her shoulders and winked. "You'll meet him soon."

 

* * *

 

"Took you long enough," Sooyoung greeted, grinning from ear to ear when Changmin entered the room. He raised an eyebrow at her expression before letting his eyes trail towards the tall, handsomely dressed man in a laboratory coat standing beside her bed. Changmin bowed in greeting as the man stepped forward. "Good afternoon, Mister Shim." He said, holding out a hand to him. "I'm Dr. Choi Siwon – your sister's attending physician. I would like to have a word with you, if you don't mind."

"He doesn't talk, Doctor-oppa," Sooyoung said cutely, earning a slight bump on the back of the head from Changmin's hand. She glared at him for a quick second then looked back at the doctor. "But he can hear you. He's not a deaf-mute as most people would think."

The doctor laughed, shaking his head at her. "I'm well aware of your brother's predicament, miss and I think we'll communicate just fine." The two men stepped out of the room and stood there for a moment not speaking. Siwon cleared his throat, opening a folder and scanning it. He looked back at Changmin with a worried expression on his face. "Your sister's condition has worsened from a simple stomach ache to a severe intestinal inflammation occupying 50% of her small and large intestines. We'll need to run more tests and keep her here for a few more days... but this isn't your biggest problem..."

/ The hospital fees have already reached the limit of our parents' insurance. / Changmin wrote, finishing the doctor's thought before her could say it. He breathed deeply, rubbing a hand on his temple before furiously writing down once again. / How much do we owe? /

"Close to a quarter of a million in dollars." The doctor said quickly. Changmin's jaw dropped and his eyes widened. He shook his head, calculating the amount in his head and writing it down. "Your parents' insurance wasn't that very big in the first place... the fees have accumulated over the past weeks your sister has been here."

"I've already decided on cutting back my service charges, but it's not enough to lower the costs of tests and the medication. Do you have any place to get the money from?" He asked, watching Changmin slump back against the wall. Siwon sighed, slumping back as well beside him and scratched the back of his neck. "I'm sorry that there's not much I can do at this point."

/ It's fine. I'll figure it out. / Changmin waved him off, nodding his head slowly. / As of now though, could you not tell Sooyoung about this? Just give her all the treatment she needs. /

The young doctor nodded, standing up straighter before turning back to enter the room with a smile on her face. Meanwhile, Changmin stayed back and breathed in deeply--closing his eyes momentarily. He felt someone take a stand beside him and he opened one eye to check, only to find a familiar face looking back at him.

"I think we can help each other." She started, holding out a hand to him. He stared at it for a moment, his brow creasing as he glanced in her eyes confused. "You need money and I need someone... to help. Please?"

_She's either serious or out of her mind._  Changmin considered her; noting her dry but puffy cheeks and sparkling eyes. He looked back into her sister's room; saw Sooyoung talking happily with the doctor and looked back at this familiar stranger. She looked at him expectantly with a half smile and he nodded, taking her hand finally and letting her lead the way.  _To hell with it._

* * *

 

"I overheard what the doctor said about your sister's hospital fees and since you made me feel better earlier, I decided to help. I hope that's not too weird." Yoona said, looking out to the sky from the hospital's roof. She stood with her hands behind her back and breathed the evening air into her lungs. "Actually, yeah – it is weird. But I've had the worse day of my life today and you were kind of the shining light today so... My name is Im Yoona, by the way."

Changmin walked towards the fence, one hand deep in his pocket and the other gripping a whiteboard and pen. She raised a curious eyebrow at him and went up to stand by his side. He sighed, the sound so soft Yoona wondered if she was the only one who heard it or if it was even there. She put her hands on the railing and pursed her lips, considering her next words.

"You... really don't talk... do you?" She said, glancing tentatively at him, He looked at her and blinked, before bringing the whiteboard in front of her and wrote, / Yes /.

"And you only communicate through a whiteboard?" Yoona said, staring at the board incredulously. Changmin shot her a look and turned back to the night sky. She slapped herself softly on the face and shook her head, "Oh no. What am I thinking?"

"I'm so sorry. Oh God, this isn't going to work. Worst day of my life, ever. What am I going to do? Shoot." She babbled loudly to herself, hiding her face under her hands. Yoona shook her head, stomping her foot once, twice and three times as her mind raced. The events of the day rushing through her consciousness in fast forward. She wondered how her day could have started so normal and warm--with things just as they should be ( _work, friends, family, lover_ : every detail was just right)--and then end so barren and disorganized that her mind goes reeling ahead of her.  _This is all just a big mistake. Probably just a nightmare I'll wake up from in a few minutes. Today could hardly be real. Could it?_

Her eyes feel heavy as she slumped into a seat on the concrete, folding her skirt over her knees and then rubbed her hands together. "My father's dying and he wants to meet the man who makes me happy. The problem with that is that my boyfriend of two years just told me earlier today that he was seeing someone else and wanted to break up... What perfect timing, huh."

_Oh so that's what this is about_. Changmin stood silently, listening to her rage on to herself. When she sat down, he felt a slight tug in his chest--something he hasn't felt for anyone unless it was heartburn. "I was going to ask you to act as my boyfriend in front of my father in exchange for my help. But I don't think it's going to work..." She looked up at him timidly, laughing a short bitter laugh. "It's too much to ask a person anyway. Much less a stranger who doesn't speak... And the idea's beyond comprehension. Not to mention, really stupid and childish and it transcends more than petty white lies."

Yoona sniffed, shaking her head. "But I'll figure it out, and I do still want to help you. It's not everyday a stranger can make you feel better after you've had a bad day."

Changmin shrugged, pulling out his mp3 from his pocket and lowered himself down to her eye level.  _It is a stupid and childish idea. But if it means help for Sooyoung... and no more tears from you..._  He cringed at the last thought and shook his head. Then he put one earphone into her ear, surprising her from her thoughts. She stared at him as he perused his playlist and then hit 'Play'. As a familiar melody began to play, he handed her the whiteboard and leaned back against his hands.

/ Stop crying. It's a deal. / It said in big block letters, and beneath it: / My name is Shim Changmin. / Yoona lips formed a small 'o' as she traced the underside of his name with her finger. She looked at this stranger's face and when he looked at her with the same non-descript expression he had shown her the first moment she saw him that day, Yoona finally let a smile form widely on her face.

[  _It'll all get better in time..._  ]

 


	2. Chapter 2

_"Changmin... Promise me you won't tell your sisters."_

 _**BOOM.**_

Changmin opened his eyes with a start, pushing himself up from his bed to look around him. The neighbor's old rickety station wagon fired again, causing him to wince at the loud boom and then sigh as he sunk back into his sheets. He rubbed his temple slowly, trying to block out the voice from his dream the night before and opened his eyes slowly as its words replayed over and over again.  _Promise me you won't tell your sisters._

_There's not much to tell, Dad_ , he thought as he slid off of his bed and bounded towards the bathroom. Changmin rubbed water over his face and looked at his reflection in the mirror. There was no change from what he looked like from that night and today – he still had his clear dark eyes and straight lipped mouth; he still didn't say much (or at all, if he really thought about it) and he was still living with his sisters in their home. Sure he had gotten a little older ( _six years older to be exact_ , he mused--noting the light stubble on his chin) but he was still the same quiet boy that came into the Choi family's lives.

"Gosh damn it!" Changmin rolled his eyes as Kwon Yuri's loud exclamation fleeted from downstairs and into the third floor where his room was. Deftly, he pulled on a shirt hanging from his door and padded downstairs, taking two steps at a time with his long legs. He found her mouthing profanities at an open stove and some strips of bacon while her boyfriend toppled over in silent laughter by the couch. Yuri looked up from her cursing and grinned sheepishly at her older brother.

"Good morning, oppa! You didn't hear me curse too loudly, did you?" she asked, fluttering her lashes sweetly as he moved towards her with a slight yawn. He shot her a look and snatched the spatula from her hands. "O~kay, so you did hear me. Hehe, sorry!" She said, putting a hand to her face and bowing before slapping her boyfriend's shoulder, "but in my defense, it was Minho's fault. He didn't tell me that bacon sizzles and pops when there's too much oil."

"It's supposed to sizzle and pop occasionally when it cooks, Yul." Minho called from his seat, shaking his head at her. She made a face at him and laughed when he pulled her into a small kiss. Changmin only rolled his eyes at their display of affection. He easily removed the bacon from the pan and set it on a plate before gesturing for Yuri to get them and some bread. She followed, skipping as she carried the plate off and popped a piece into her mouth.

"Oppa, we were thinking of visiting mom and dad's grave later before going over to Sooyoung-unni in the hospital... want to come with us?" Yuri asked, taking a big gulp from her juice. Minho shook his head at her, squeezing her hand. "Don't," he warned, frowning at her but she ignored him. She stared at her brother's back intently as Changmin moved around the kitchen and waited for him to react. When he didn't turn to face her, she let out a loud sigh and leaned back by balancing the chair by two of its legs. "We haven't gone in awhile... well, at least you haven't."

"Oppa?"

Yuri turned to look back and found the kitchen empty. She clicked her tongue, shaking her head while her boyfriend sighed into his juice. "I told you not to push it," He said, holding out a fork with a piece of bacon from its end. "You know he doesn't want to." She opened her mouth and took the meat between her teeth and shrugged.

"Well... at least I tried."

 

* * *

 

 

"When will I meet this mystery man, eh?" Mr. Im said, settling himself comfortably on his bed and looked up from his book just as Yoona arranged new flowers on his table. She shrugged, dusting the flower petals lightly with her finger and smelled them. "At least describe him to me!"

"He's tall and very quiet. Quite literally, actually."

"That's not much of a description, my dear. I need more than that. Information like, is he handsome? Or is he smarter than a fifth grader? Or does he have some sort of foot fungus?"

Yoona shook her head, wrinkling her nose at him and his lame attempts in humor. "Ha ha, very funny. You sounded just like sis, Dad. And believe me, it won't be any fun if you know all the facts before you even meet him."  _Heck, I don't even know any yet... except for the name._  She sat down softly on the bed and grinned at him. "Give it some time. You'll meet him soon."

Mr. Im huffed and clicked his tongue, waving a finger at her face. "Later, I hope? You can't keep me in the dark forever, you know. I haven't got much time left."

"Don't say that." She argued, her smile dropping into a frown at his smiling face. She took a deep breath, held his hand in hers and squeezed. "Just because you've refused treatment in a  _hospital_  doesn't mean you won't get it at home."

He nodded, patting her hand with his free one. "Of course, Yoona. I was only kidding." They smiled at each other. "But I still have to meet the man who makes my youngest happy in this lifetime."

Yoona laughed softly (feeling slightly guilty for the non-truth of it all), brushing his face with a hand and kissed his cheek. "You will, I promise."

 

* * *

 

 

"So Siwon-oppa said that you agreed on letting me stay here for a little longer for tests--my question here is: how the heck are we going to pay for it?" Sooyoung exclaimed, stabbing her red jello into her mouth in between words. Changmin shook his head at her before deftly taking the cup from her hands and setting it down on the table.

/ Don't worry about it. It'll be fine. / He wrote, patting his sister's head comfortingly.  _I made a pretty good deal considering I don't know much about the girl who offered aside from the name._  She rolled her eyes at him and shook his hand off.

"I'm not twelve anymore, Changmin and that measly construction job of yours and our music store barely covers our daily expenses! We can't afford any more days here! What are we going to do? Are you going to go to the red-light district and sell your body? Oh my God, please no!" Sooyoung exclaimed, covering her eyes at the very thought and thus earning a hard smack on the forehead.

She looked up to see him glaring at her and nervously let out a laugh. "I was kidding, oppa. Hehe, I'll stay for as long as I need to. As long as you say--I mean, write that you can pay for it, okay?"

/ Good girl. /

Sooyoung sighed, leaning back against her pillows and reached for the jello once again. She grinned, taking a small bite. "The bright side is that I get to see Siwon-oppa a little longer, right?"

 

* * *

 

 

Yoona took a deep breath as she opened the car door and stepped into the light. "Thanks, Sunghyun-shii. I'll call if I need a ride back." She said, bowing slightly at the driver in front. The driver nodded, tipping his little hat slightly before edging away from its stop on the street and onto the main road. Yoona brushed her hair back with a hand as she entered the park – where they had agreed to meet to... iron out some details.

"I wonder if he's here already..." she mused, tugging her blouse neatly on her shoulder. Yoona thought of the night before and smiled, remembering his nonchalant expression when he held up his name on a whiteboard in front of her eyes. It was almost cute how he seemed so incapable to say no to a crying girl when he looked and acted so tough and aloof. She grinned, walking through the green grass and soft afternoon breeze. "Still, he's a guy after all."

Suddenly, a hand grabbed hold of her wrist and she gave a shout in shock. Changmin winced at the sound and rolled his eyes at her – holding up the whiteboard, / You're late. / Yoona gave him a hard slap on the shoulder, folding her hands across her chest and frowning.

"You scared the heck out of me!" she complained, bringing a hand on her chest. He only shrugged in response and wrote again, / Are you just going to stand there? / He gestured on a tuff of grass next to him and raised an eyebrow. She scoffed, muttering under her breath before carefully folding her long skirt under her legs and sat down.

They fell silent for a moment, watching people jog and walk past them. Yoona pursed her lips, considering her words before letting out a long sigh. "So... we agreed to meet today to iron out some details, right?" She started, fingering the edge of her light blue skirt. She stole a quick look at his stoic face and whiteboard. "We should probably get to know each other first before I introduce you to my dad. I can't not know my own 'boyfriend' after all. Uh..."

Just as she opened her mouth to speak again, the whiteboard was pushed towards her. She blinked at him for a moment before reading the words on its surface. / Quick question: How are you going to pay for a quarter of a million? /

Yoona bit her lip and pushed the board back to him. She waved a hand in front of his face and laughed nervously. "Oh. My mom left me a large sum of... just... don't worry about it. It's fine. Just think of it as charity – you know, Daddy's little rich girl having money to spare and giving it to people who need it." She pressed her lips together. "That sort of thing."

Changmin watched her face give way to a dark cloud and instantly felt bad for asking.  _Oh sure, alienate the person who wants to help with your sister's hospital bills. Nice job, Shim._  He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, quickly scribbling a note: / Sorry. I was just curious. /

She shook her head, relaxing at his hastily written words and smiled at him. "No, it's ok. Maybe I'll tell you everything when I know you better," she said, shrugging her shoulder. "But for now, we should just talk and write good things about ourselves ... like friends. We'll get to the serious stuff eventually."

Changmin nodded, / Alright. / Then as he spread his long legs in front of him, he looked at her straight in the eyes expectantly. Yoona blinked, surprised at the intensity of his stare and raised her index finger to point to herself. "Oh, you mean I have to start?" she asked, her eyes wide. He blinked back, waiting for her to answer and with another sigh, she obliged. "Ok, so... you already know my name but-- My name is Im Yoona. I'm turning twenty-three by the end of May and I'm about to graduate from a Medicine program at Seoul University."

"I have an older sister who's married and has a baby in the U.S. and my dad's in the hospital because of his weak heart valves..." Yoona bit her lip, looking up to him to see if he was still listening. He stared back at her. "My mom died when I was eight years old... and I've only had one boyfriend in my life, so I'm... not really good at this. Please jump in and interrupt me anytime."

/ No, go ahead. / He wrote, tapping the pen on the whiteboard. She laughed softly, shaking her head at how odd it is to communicate through a board. "I think I've said enough for an introduction. Why don't you go s--I mean, write something? How old are you?"

/ I'm twenty five. / He wrote, / And I've never had a boyfriend. /

Yoona laughed, slapping him playfully on the arm. "You're a jerk." She said, sticking her tongue out at him "Be serious."

He shrugged, smirking at her and wrote again. / I didn't attend University. I work at a construction site and manage a music store and take care of my two sisters. They're names are Choi Sooyoung and Kwon Yuri. /

"Why do your sisters have different last names?" she asked, pointing down at the board before looking up at him curiously. Changmin raised an eyebrow and added another line beneath the names. / Yuri and I adopted... obviously. / He smirked when she rolled her eyes at him in response.

"What are they like?" Yoona asked, ignoring the arrogant (though attractive) smirk on his lips. She smiled sweetly at him, edging her face closer to his. "Are they the complete opposite of you? Because I do hope they are."

It was his turn to roll his eyes. "What? You'll have to get used to it because I am your 'girlfriend', aren't I?" she said, cheekily. She fluttered her eyes playfully and grinned wider when he rolled his eyes again. / Both of them are energetic. Yuri kind of talks a lot but she's entertaining and people love her. Meanwhile, Sooyoung eats a lot. /

He heaved a sigh and shook his head, erasing the board quickly to write more. / That's the main reason why she's in the hospital. Her doctor says she must have eaten something bad while on her shift in the restaurant near our house. /

/ She's always had an iron stomach, but still – she could have at least been a bit more careful. /

Yoona let out a chuckle, surprising him out of his thoughts. She tilted her head to the side and gave him a bright smile, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You're actually a protective oppa. I never would have guessed with this whole dark aura you have surrounding you. You're not a bad guy at all... you're actually sweet." She said, smiling at him.

Changmin wrinkled his brow and shook his head, pulling his board and his body away from her. She laughed at him as he shrugged off her hand on his shoulder in mock annoyance.  _But you're definitely still a macho guy_ , Yoona mused, drawing her legs closer to her. "My sister says I have an iron stomach too, because I can eat anything and not feel bad afterwards. She said it was strange for a woman of my size to eat that much – my dad always said it was what makes me adorable in his eyes. But then again, he's my dad so he's biased."

/ You and Sooyoung should have an eating contest then. /

"Who would be the referee? Wouldn't you be a bit biased too?" she replied, raising an eyebrow. Changmin shook his head, letting a small smile creep into his lips.

/ I'll try not to be, since I'm your 'boyfriend'. / He wrote–winking (awkwardly) and earning a slight blush on Yoona's cheeks. He stared down at her, inching his face even closer to hers. She looked away, hitting him softly over the shoulder. / You'll have to get used to it. / he wrote, mimicking her earlier words and earning another slap and blush on her cheeks.

He grinned and pulled back, fanning the board to her pink face. "You are a jerk. Really." Yoona breathed, glaring at him. Resting her chin on her knees, she hummed thoughtfully and nudged him. "What about your adoptive parents? What were they like?"

His smile fell and he stiffened unconsciously. She blinked, raising her head to look at him closely. Changmin stayed still for a moment before turning to lie on his back. [  _"Changmin... Promise me you won't tell your sisters."_  ] He sighed, rubbing a hand over his eyes.  _I won't tell them._  He opened his eyes and glanced at Yoona's beautiful face.

Yoona watched his change of mood in surprise, casting a shadow over his eyes so quickly as the twinkle she thought she saw for a second disappeared. He drew his attention back to his board and she blinked. She waited for him to finish writing and sat still observing. The sun was bearing down on them and even though they were in a shady part of the square, the morning light drew planes on his attractive face as he concentrated on writing on his board.

The minutes ticked on for what felt like an eternity. "Changmi--"

Changmin shoved the board under her nose before she could finish saying his name. / Why don't we go somewhere else? It's too hot here. / Quickly, he stood up and started walking away leaving a confused Yoona at his wake. She blinked; staring after him surprised before turning her attention back to the board in her hands and looked at it again.

"Oh."

She sighed, pulling her hand back and let it fall on her side.

"Don't walk so fast!" she called, dusting off the seat of her skirt and ran towards him. He waited for her to be beside him before taking the board from her hands and pulling it under his arm. Yoona stared after it, wondering how this deal was ever going to work... when her partner-in-crime continued to surprise her every second they spent together.

At the right hand corner, in small wispy writing, it said: / They're dead. /

 

* * *

 

 

"Okay... what about you favorite color?"

The pair had spent the rest of the afternoon together, walking aimlessly around Seoul's busy streets while getting to know each other. They were a block and a half from the hospital now (though they hardly noticed their surroundings), walking very slowly and sipping their juice drinks through a straw.

Changmin cocked his head towards a white Lexus parked near the curb, and then turned back to look at her. Yoona nodded, biting her straw absentmindedly and admiring the car before answering, "I like yellow... like sunflowers."

/ Song? / He wrote in scraggly writing before gesturing towards his ear. Yoona stifled a laugh, shaking her head at him for trying so hard to convey his message and looking ridiculous. "You could just talk you know..." she said, smirking at him. She gave him a bemused grin and he rolled his eyes. / Just answer the question. /

"Sheesh, temper much?" Yoona tapped on the plastic cup's body and thought hard. "Hmm, I don't really have a favorite song. But I've been humming a song by Girls' Generation a lot, so maybe it's that right now?"

Changmin made a face, wrinkling his nose and shook his head all at the same time. / You need to update your music. / He wrote, nudging her with an elbow. / But since you're a Med student, you probably don't have time. /

"I'm amazed at how easily you can write without looking at your board and walking at the same time." Yoona smiled, peering over the board as he erased the words. "And you're right... I don't really know much about the trends these days. I've been holed up for the past year."

/ Didn't you have a boyfriend? I thought girls kept up with trends when they date. /

"I'm not really the type. And yes, I know it's lame." She waved, making a face. Changmin smirked, shaking his head at her. "We've got the basics down. Let's move on to another topic, please..."

/ I'll make you a mix sometime. / He wrote, balancing the board on one hand and taking her empty juice drink and throwing it into a nearby trash can with the other. He walked a couple of paces ahead before noticing that his companion had stopped and stared at him with a surprised (but pleased) expression on her face. He raised an eyebrow at her, tilting his head slightly.  _What is it now?_

"That was a very 'boyfriend' type thing to offer." She said, laughing at his curious expression.  _It was really sweet too, unexpected but sweet._  "I didn't think you'd be this easy to befriend!"

He scoffed, shaking his head and turned back to walk away. Yoona let out a laugh again and walked quickly to catch up to him – grabbing his arm in the process. He stiffened from the contact and stopped walking to look at her in shock. She stared back at him, blinking. "What?"

Changmin looked down at her, his eyes fleeting from her arm linked to his then back to her face. She rolled her eyes, slapping his arm softly. "Oh come on! You can't expect me to introduce you to my father with you standing three feet away from me, do you?" she exclaimed, smiling at his distressed face. She ignored his warmth radiating towards hers through their close contact and elbowed him slightly. "We should at least show some... contact, since we're a 'couple' and all."

He heaved a sigh, considering her words.  _She has a point. What's the point of pretending to be a couple when we don't act like one?_  Changmin thought, slapping his board lightly on his face. He looked over at her humming to herself and waiting for him to answer and felt a warmth come towards his cheeks. Get it together, Shim! You've dated before and you're only pretending this time.

He let out a deep breath and began to write, bringing his linked arm over to cover the board. Yoona craned her neck to see what he was writing but couldn't as it was turned away from her. Then, he lowered the board and she took it in her free hand – her eyes widening slightly as she read.

/ Holding hands seems more intimate, don't you think? /

"Uh... right," She said, her arm loosening its grip on his and slid down. They stared at each other for a moment, weighing the moment before slowly, Changmin held out his hand towards her. Yoona blinked at him in surprise. "You're serious? I-I've never held another guy's hand except for Dong--"

He grabbed her hand before she could finish her sentence and held in tightly in his. She gasped at the contact, a blush rushing to her cheeks as he began to walk again and pulled her to follow. He sighed, scratching the back of his head in exasperation as he took heavy steps on the busy street. Both of them were silent as they walked on, looking anywhere but at each other. Yoona coughed slightly – stealing a look at him, her fingers lacing between his.

"Your hand is warm..." she whispered, more to herself than to him. He cleared his throat upon hearing her and their fingers stayed laced together comfortably, as they took their steps in time.

"Wow. Who's the chick, oppa?" A loud voice said, surprising both of them out of their reverie and making Yoona jump into Changmin's arms in alarm. Yuri stood before them, surprised before doubling over and laughing as they jumped apart seconds later once realizing the position they were in. "That was so precious! Is she your girlfriend, oppa?"

The lively girl skipped towards them, grabbing Yoona's hand into a handshake. "I'm Kwon Yuri – Changmin-oppa's young and feisty adoptive sister. And you are?"

 

* * *

 

[ You little witch! Why am I the last person to know? ]

[ Hyoyeon... now is  _not_  a good time. ]

[ Excuse me but it is! Why did that b*stard Donghae break up with you? ]

[ I don't know, okay... he just ended things. Look, can I call you back? ]

[ Why in God's name can't you talk now? This is major! ]

[ ... I'm kinda meeting my  _boyfriend_ 's sisters... it's a long story. ]

[ BOYFRIEND?! ]


	3. Chapter 3

“Wow.”

“Gosh, I know right! It’s like the Earth’s shifted from its’ axis!”

“Just… wow.”

“Exactly! It’s like Hell’s frozen over, or an alternate reality – or Christmas! An early Christmas miracle!”

Yoona felt herself shrinking behind Changmin’s shadow at every word that came out of her sisters’ mouth. She wondered vaguely to herself how a simple day of ‘getting-to-know-your-accomplice’ would end up in a hospital room with said accomplice’s family peering closely at them –

“Just wo… Ow!!! Oppa, that’s foul play!” Sooyoung cried, rubbing the top of her head where Changmin had struck her quickly with his whiteboard. She reached out to punch him on the arm but then huffed when he easily stepped away from her reach.

He glared at her, /Stop saying ‘wow’. It’s rude./

—Yoona sighed, knowing fully well that clearly today was not her lucky day.

“You really shouldn’t hit your sister like that. She’s a patient and should be taken cared for.” She said, giving him a slight roll of the eyes. She hoped he would react and excuse himself so they could escape, but instead he shrugged it off and stepped back to lean on the wall and erase his board with his palm – leaving her there at the mercy of his sisters watching her every move intensely. Yoona felt her hand clench, aching to slap him ( _I haven’t done this before, damn you!_ ) and run, however she just smiled and blinked back at her audience.

“Um, hello! My name is Im Yoona. It’s very nice to meet the two of you,” she said, bowing politely. Anxiously, she tucked her hair behind her ear and waited for them to respond – which didn’t take too long when suddenly Sooyoung reached out to her and wrapped her arms around her in a tight hug. Yuri followed a second later and tightened their hug on her petite frame. Yoona could only blink in surprise, turning her head to look at Changmin shaking his in – what was it? Dismay? Embarrassment?

She sighed, silently praying for strength to pull through this disastrous “plan” she allowed herself to think up and hoped it wouldn’t backfire. _At least… not yet,_ she thought briefly, gently patting the girls’ backs softly (anxiously).

“I’ve wanted an older sister for so long!” Sooyoung cried, smiling as she took her hand and shook it energetically. Yuri laughed and jumped onto her sister’s bed and shook her (other) hand too, grinning from ear to ear. “We were worried he’d end up as a hermit or something.” The younger girl said, tilting her head towards her brother’s direction (who only rolled his eyes and popped an earphone into his ear and tuned them out with music).

Yoona rolled her eyes and sighed, shaking her head. _Gee, thanks man. Leaving me to converse with your sisters alone when we haven’t even gotten our ‘story’ straight._ She sat gingerly on the chair next to the bed and looked up at the sisters smiling at her. She smiled back, letting her hand touch her chin restlessly. “Is he always this… rude?”

The girls shrugged, fortunately not noticing her distress. “We’re used to him ignoring us half of the time to care. He doesn’t like to get involved in girl talk – but then again what straight guy wants that?”

“I guess…” She trailed off, glancing at her partner-in-crime slightly bobbing his head to his music, “I bet he ignored his past girlfriends too.”

“We wouldn’t really know. We’ve never met them.”

Yoona’s lips unconsciously widened into a smile and she raised an eyebrow. “Really?” she said, a little too loudly for an indoor voice and directed her gaze towards the man leaning against the wall. Her smile widened even further when his frame tensed slightly and he gave her a sideway glance.

She continued, eyes and lips widening into a mock look of surprise and said sarcastically, “I thought he’d be a regular Casanova, with his brooding personality and would bring girls home often. I figured girls would fall all over that type.” Yoona sighed, making “tsk” sounds and pursed her lips together. “I guess I chose the wrong type of brooding guy to like.”

She grinned at him innocently and then giggled as he rolled his eyes at her before turning his attention back to his mp3. She glanced at Yuri and Sooyoung conspiringly and casually shrugged when they immediately understood.

“Oppa, she’s funny!” Yuri exclaimed, laughing and waving her hand to catch her brother’s attention. Changmin looked at them and said nothing (as usual), shaking his head again while reaching out to write on his board.

/At my expense, I’m sure she is./ He wrote, tilting his head to stare at Yoona (as if to say that he heard everything Yoona had just said and would get back at her eventually).

She met his eyes innocently and fluttered her lashes for effect. The action surprised her for a moment and she stopped abruptly, blinking. Seeing this, Changmin smirked and stepped away from the wall. He put an arm around the back of the chair as he squeezed into her seat and pulled his face close to hers – their eyes boring into each other in determination and waiting for the other to look away first.

It didn’t matter that Changmin’s hands had started to sweat as her beautiful eyes stared back at his or that his throat had gone considerably dry when she opened her soft mouth slightly. Somehow, those details didn’t bother him as much as when she finally looked away with a slight grimace crossing her features.

He bit the inside of his cheek, deciding to ponder about it later and instead looked back at his sisters with a wink.

/She really likes me. That’s for sure./

They laughed, shaking their heads while Yoona laughed with less humor, avoiding his eyes. “Touché.” She murmured, soft enough for only him to hear. He shrugged, ignoring the way his ears buzzed even without the thump of music ringing through them as he stared down at her. “We need to straighten thi—”

“Oh, hello. I didn’t think your whole family would still be here, Sooyoung-shii.” Siwon said, appearing suddenly at the door in buttoned-up shirt and loose tie. He bowed politely at them, stepping inside the room almost tentatively before reaching towards Sooyoung’s Medical chart. Everyone greeted him warmly (Sooyoung with her bright eyes and beaming smile, Yuri with her cheerful ‘Hello’ and Changmin with a nod) except for Yoona, who sunk back into her seat as Siwon moved closer towards the bed.

 _Oh no. I forgot about sunbae!_ Her mind panicked and she covered her face with a hand. Choi Siwon had been her four years senior in her University and knew of her and Donghae, her ex-boyfriend. They were friends at some degree she recalled, since he and Donghae would frequent the same bar and gym. She wondered vaguely if Donghae had told anyone else about their break-up, and tentatively lowered her hand to glance at her senior who seemed to not notice her at all.

“Siwon-oppa.” Sooyoung’s voice rang sweetly in the air as she said his name. “We’ve got great news to share. It’s a miracle, I promise.”

“Oh? What is it?” He asked, smiling as he folded his arms across his chest. _A little too widely too_ , Yoona noted, grinning and glancing back and forth at her senior and Sooyoung. She momentarily forgot to realize what Sooyoung had meant for a miracle and put her hand down from her face and nudged Changmin with a knowing glance.

“Oppa’s got a girlfriend! A really pretty talking one too!” Yuri exclaimed, cutting her sister off just as she was about to say the exact same thing as well. Sooyoung glared at her for a split second before letting out a laugh and pointing at Yoona’s form against Changmin’s side.

“Oh so he does, does he? Who might the lucky la—Yoona?” Siwon stopped, his brow furrowing once recognition of the woman’s petite form registered in his mind. He tilted his head as she froze in her spot (her face inches from Changmin’s and her body sharing one seat with him). “Im Yoona.”

Yoona pressed her lips together, considering her words before turning towards her senior. She shot Changmin a worried glance and then pulled a smile on her face. “Hello, Siwon-sunbae,” she greeted, bowing her head immaculately in greeting. She thought about standing up but felt frozen in her seat. “It’s been awhile…”

“You… are Changmin’s girlfriend?”

“… Yes.”

Siwon’s brow furrowed close together and his eyes stared back at her accusingly. “What about Donghae?”

Yoona winced at the sound of _his_ name being mentioned and opened her mouth to speak. Unfortunately, no words came to mind. Her heartbeat drummed against her ears and she fought the tears that threatened to fall. _Damn emotions. You don’t just get over heartbreak overnight! Even if you are ‘pretending’ to be with someone else for your father._ She absentmindedly gripped her hands on her knees as she tried to collect her thoughts and respond. She didn’t notice Changmin’s eyes on her nor his hand suddenly covering her own softly. _This was such stupid plan._

“Who’s Donghae?” Sooyoung asked, tilting her head to the side. “Unni’s ex-boyfriend?”

Changmin made no motion to respond immediately, only looking at Yoona’s bowed head. _She said she’s only had one boyfriend. That must be his name._ He thought, wrapping his hand upon hers comfortingly – if not to show Siwon that they were a ‘couple’. Slowly, he looked up again and nodded - shooting the young doctor a look.

/They’ve been broken up for a while now./ He knew it was a lie since it had only been last night after all, but it was still true to an extent.

Siwon regarded him for a moment, taking in his stoic face and the hand wrapped protectively around her hand. It didn’t make sense to him, knowing fully well about Lee Donghae’s relationship with this lady, Im Yoona, in front of him. He didn’t know her very well, and had only seen her a couple of times at class reunions where Donghae would bring her and leave early. She didn’t come off as the type that dated around or lied. But Siwon had spoken to Donghae not too long ago in a bar with a few of their friends and he had said they were still together – was that a lie? He hardly thought so (if anything, this right here _in front of him_ was a lie) and decided to speak again, “I do—”

“Choi-sunbae!” Hyoyeon cried, bursting through the door in such haste that almost everyone in the room jumped at the volume of her voice. Her heels clicked on the tiled floor as she entered the room with a wide grin on her face.

Yoona looked up and smiled at her best friend. _Thank God for Kim Hyoyeon and her impeccable timing._ She felt relieved that she’d shown up and worried at the same time for the slight deadly glint her eyes held when she looked back at her.

 _You have a lot of explaining to do._ Hyoyeon’s glare seemed to say and she would make sure she’d hear it all.

“I thought your shift ended an hour ago. Why are you still here? Visiting someone special?”

Color stained the young doctor’s ears red at her comment and he shook his head a little too vigorously in response. “Kim Hyoyeon… I thought your training here already ended. Why are _you_ still here?”

She waved her hand casually and placed it on her hip, smiling flirtatiously. She stepped closer towards them, stopping just beside Yoona and Changmin sitting together on one chair. “There are no rules against visiting a hospital on your free days, sunbae. Plus there’s this very cute male nurse in the fifth floor that I’ve got an eye on so…”

Hyoyeon laughed at Siwon’s incredulous expression and playfully hit him on the shoulder. “Oh don’t give me that look! I was kidding – Yoona, her _boyfriend_ and I are actually going to dinner. She said we’d meet later since they’d be here visiting his sisters but I couldn’t wait and since I haven’t met his sisters’ either I thought I’d show up early.”

“So you’ve met him before?” He asked, his brow furrowing together. She nodded, slapping a hand on Changmin’s shoulder. He winced at the impact of the blow (he shared a look with an apologetic Yoona) and offered a small smile. There wasn’t much he could do anyway; they’d be caught (by the doctor and his sisters) if he had reacted otherwise.

“Of course I’ve met him! He’s Yoona’s boyfriend after all. I just call him ‘Broody’ though, just as I called the last one ‘Fishy’.”

“You called Donghae ‘Fishy’?”

“Totally. He has that blank look that a fish has a lot of the time that they were dating. You should stare at a goldfish sometime.”

“Right. I can picture it now.” Siwon shook his head and laughed, convinced. He bowed apologetically at Yoona and then at Changmin before standing up straight again and scratching his nape in embarrassment. “I’m sorry about my slightly accusatory tone earlier, Yoona-shii. I guess Donghae forgot to mention your break up when I last saw him.”

Yoona smiled (relieved that they had narrowly avoided disaster), and bowed back. “It’s alright, Sunbae. I understand.”

“Don’t worry about it, oppa! I’m sure he forgot to tell Hyukjae too.” Hyoyeon said, shrugging. Siwon laughed and nodded.

“You’re probably right. I should go now, it’s late.” He said, bowing once again to bid farewell, “Sooyoung-shii, you should sleep early tonight. You need your rest; no matter how energetic you think you feel. I’ll check on you again tomorrow.”

“But it’s a Sunday tomorrow. It’s your day-off.” Hyoyeon said, blinking at him devilishly. His ears turned pink almost instantaneously and he sputtered an incoherent goodbye and an uneasy smile before walking out the door. She laughed once he disappeared, sitting down on the bed comfortably and turning her head to face the patient occupying it. “He totally likes you, by the way.”

This time it was Sooyoung’s cheeks that turned a crimson color and she squealed, hiding her face behind her hands. Yuri followed suit, teasing and laughing as she nudged her sister with an elbow. The girls laughed together – sharing a mutual sense of excitement over that one statement and started chatting happily.

“Wow, I hadn’t even introduced myself! My name is Kim Hyoyeon, I’m Yoona’s best friend.” Hyoyeon said, bowing her head slightly at the sisters and grinning. They exchanged the usual pleasantries and then started casually talking to one another once again (about the departed young doctor and his obvious affection for his patient). Seeing this, Yoona felt herself relax and let out a relieved sigh.

“We need to straighten things out.” She whispered, staring down at his hand on hers. His hand was warm, exactly how it was when they had held hands earlier today as well. She felt her heart twinge slightly and she removed her hand from his, brushing her loose strands of hair back behind her ear. She cleared her throat. “We should tell Hyoyeon about _this_ … she helped us just now. I think it’s only fair, don’t you think?”

Changmin nodded, feeling curiously disappointed from the loss of her hand in his and let out an inaudible sigh. Slowly he stood up, running a hand (the one that held hers just moments ago) through his hair. He stepped away slightly and then bowed, holding up his whiteboard to Hyoyeon’s surprised face.

/It’s nice to see you _again_ , Hyoyeon-shii./ The word ‘again’ was written more darkly than the others and she regarded him with a curious stare. Hyoyeon looked at Yoona for any answer and found instead a guilty glint in her doe eyes. She sighed, pasting on another one of her bright smiles and stood up – holding out a hand.

“Nice to see you too, Broody,” she said, shaking his hand. His hand was firm, strong – _Acceptable; even without knowing his name yet_ , Hyoyeon thought, as she sashayed out of the room after saying ‘goodbye’ to her new found friends, _Broody’s sisters_ , Choi Sooyoung and Kwon Yuri.

“Let’s go to dinner now, okay?”

 

* * *

 

“That is the most ridiculous plan I have ever heard.” Hyoyeon drawled, swinging her beer onto her lips and slamming it down on the table a moment later.

They were in a bar in downtown Seoul, a tiny place that looked more like a café than anything but served plenty of drinks. It was already late in the evening when they finally left the hospital and finished relaying the ‘plan’ to Hyoyeon over dinner – and now, there was nothing left for them (Changmin and Yoona sat together at their side of the booth) to do but to listen to their new accomplice’s reaction. Her eyes were bright – almost livid, Changmin noted and Yoona cringed; except she wasn’t angry – only confused and worried.

She continued, tapping the neck of the bottle with her index finger. “You do realize that if any of your stories get mixed up, it’d be a lot of trouble, right?”

“I know… that’s why we told you about it.” Yoona said, biting her inner cheek and smiling nervously.

Hyoyeon groaned, shaking her head and making a ‘tsk’ sound with her tongue. “So I’m the person who’ll back you up on whatever now, huh? Damn, Yoona… I didn’t think you had an impulsive or stupid bone in you but I guess I was wrong.” She let out a frustrated sigh and leaned back against her seat, taking in the sight of her best friend staring guiltily at her and her… quiet partner holding his glass of scotch and ice absentmindedly.

“And this dude doesn’t speak – except for a whiteboard,” she said, pointing at Changmin with a menacing glare which he met coolly.

/I don’t appreciate being called ‘dude’./ He wrote, letting out a breath as he put his board on the table. Hyoyeon looked over his handwriting appreciatively and shrugged.

“Please, it gives a sense of… I don’t know—a kinship between us. I’m your girlfriend’s best friend after all. We should be friends too.” She said matter-of-factly. Yoona nodded her head slightly in agreement and nudged him with an elbow. Hyoyeon watched the pair look at each other for a moment ( _communicating with their eyes_ , she noted – another devilish grin forming on her face) until finally Changmin rolled his eyes and wrote again.

/The I’d rather you call me ‘Broody’./

“Broody Changmin it is!” She cheered, sharing a grin with her friend as he rolled his eyes and massaged his temple. The she tapped his whiteboard with the bottom of her bottle. “Can’t you have learned sign language or Braille or something instead? It’d be a lot easier than to bring a board everywhere”

/Braille is for blind people./ — “Braille is for blind people, Hyo.”

Hyoyeon laughed despite herself, watching the pair in front of her look at each other in surprise. “Wow. This might be all pretend but the two of you seem to be on the same wavelength. It’s almost believable.”

“So you’ll help us?” Yoona asked, her tone hitched in anticipation and hope. She wrapped her hands around her best friend’s and squeezed it. _Please say yes_ , her eyes seemed to say, _I need my best friend’s support._

Hyoyeon could only sigh and give her a smile and a reassuring squeeze back before nodding. “Of course, Yoong. I’m your home girl.”

There wasn’t much she could do anyway, but to help her friend in her time of need. Granted, she though her plan was crazy but it was thought up with the best possible intention. It was something Hyoyeon loved about her friend after all: her unfaltering determination to keep her father (especially) and everyone she loved happy – no matter the cost. Yoona smiled widely in response and leaned back against her own chair with a relieved sigh escaping her lips. The man beside her looked over to her and handed her his drink (which she took and drank without protest – _she’s never liked scotch before_ – or lecture about ‘microbes’ – something Hyoyeon had never seen her do), his eyes softening as he looked at her. Hyoyeon’s lips curled into a smile – plus, there’s the fact that Yoona’s less conscious of herself and more (what was it?) relaxed despite the break up intrigued her more than anything.

She regarded this man under her gaze and smirked. _He’s not bad for the eyes at all – just needs a better hair cut_ , she mused, bringing her bottle to lips again and grinning.

Hyoyeon said nothing more about the plan after that and instead continued to tease her friend’s _boyfriend_. She kind of liked him by the end of the night, as she stepped into a cab they’d hailed for her. He was polite and sarcastic at all the right moments and rolled with the punches she threw at him mercilessly. He didn’t seem like the type of who thought about death and sorrow a lot, although his aura gave off that vibe. Changmin only seemed to care about his sisters.

She smiled, looking back at the couple behind the car window and watched them walk in the opposite direction. He had removed his thick jacket and draped it across Yoona’s shoulders. The action was normal – polite. _But who knows?_  

 

* * *

 

“That was interesting, don’t you think?” Yoona whispered, pulling his jacket close to her face and breathing deeply. They fell into rhythmic step together, watching remnants of February snow crunch and melt under the soles of their shoes. She fingered the hem of his jacket sleeve and sighed. “I didn’t expect that to happen so quickly.”

He said nothing, but pulled out his earphones and mp3. She shrugged. “Yeah, I guess you’ve had enough of writing today. I’m kind of sick of talking too – but I can’t seem to stop. We’ve got a long way ahead of us—oh?”

Changmin shrugged as he inserted one of his earphones into her ear without announcing it, and Yoona found herself not really minding it. Normally, she’d have jumped and screamed, demanding for the other person to _get his hands off her_ but instead with this person – [ _No need to worry your pretty little head_ ]

“I did a lot of things I normally never do today.” Yoona said, her lips slipping into a smile. Their feet moved together in harmony, their steps slow and deliberate. “I held another man’s hand, met said man’s family, drank his scotch and schemed with my best friend.”

She laughed, the sound rippling across the night’s silent air and causing Changmin to let a smile form on his lips. Her car was just up ahead, and she waved at her driver as he started the vehicle with a low rumble. [ _No need to hurry or worry about tomorrow_ ] “I’ve never opened myself to a stranger before. It feels… liberating and nice. Your sisters are lucky to have you looking after them.”

“It’ll be fine, right? When you meet my father?” She asked, not really expecting an answer. Changmin didn’t make a motion to make one either and she nodded, calm and understanding ( _I keep surprising myself_ , she thought). She moved to shrug his jacket off but stopped when he pulled the lapels closer to her neck.

[ _It's gonna be ok_ ]

Yoona shook her head, her smile unwavering as she stared up at him. “I chose the right type of brooding guy, didn’t I?” She shook off her scarf and wrapped it around his neck, patting the fabric softly once it covered him neatly. He only smirked in response and she let out a mock frustrated sigh – before giving up and laughing again.

“Thank you.”

Then she stepped back and opened the door, slipping into the vehicle smoothly. She winked at him from the open car window and waved – the car driving off slowly from the cub and into the night.

 _No… thank you._ Changmin bowed his head, letting his hand feel the fabric of her scarf and smiled.

 

* * *

 

The car window rolled down with a soft sound as she stared out and watched from a distance. The boy in the fraying picture she held in her hand was smiling broadly, wrapped around loving arms… but this time, well – the boy had grown up. _Six years can do a lot for an eighteen year old boy._ She thought, looking back down at the photo before trailing her eyes up towards the man walking alongside a woman wearing his jacket.

They walked silently, not speaking, towards a car parked just ahead of them. The woman bowed gracefully, removing his jacket only to be stopped by him. She smiled, shaking her head and removing the scarf around her neck and putting it around his. Then she bowed again (perhaps in _thanks_? She wasn’t so sure – she couldn’t hear them from here) and entered the vehicle, leaving him staring after her wake.

“Miss Jung, should we go to him now?” Her driver said, surprising her out of her thoughts. Jessica Jung shook her head, rolling up the car window and tucking the picture back into her purse.

_2005 February 18. Our son Changmin’s 18 th birthday._

She looked back out, watching him turn around and walk further and further from them – ignoring their presence, she was sure of that and crossed the street. He stopped for a moment, looking back and staring at the car, them, _her_. Then, he turned away – and he was gone.

“Miss Jung?”

“No,” she said; her voice suddenly wary and tired, “not tonight – Mother needs company. Let’s go home.”


	4. Chapter 4

Hyoyeon hummed quietly to herself as she drove past slow walking civilians one glorious Saturday morning. She’s feeling a little too chipper out in the early sun than usual and she briefly wondered why.

Perhaps it’s because a lot has happened in past couple of weeks? And by _a lot_ she meant the on-going connection her best friend and her ‘boyfriend’ seemed to have growing over the past days.

It didn’t escape her notice the fact that ‘Mr. Broody’ Shim Changmin came by everyday, just as they stepped out of their dreary classrooms to walk her friend to her car or grab a cup of coffee. The first time he came by, he was anxious and felt out of place – towering over Medical students in their University. Yoona had paid no attention to the confused stares their classmates had given her (they were used to seeing Fishy pick her up, standing against his white Lexus and spacing out) and greeted him politely.

They were so cute, Hyoyeon had thought, being so awkward and shy that day as they walked off.It was like one of those clichéd moments in a high school manhwa where the lead characters meet the day after confessing their ‘love’.

Hyoyeon grinned to herself, stepping on the acceleration just a bit and crossed an open intersection. She knew better, of course – that this little game of pretend would lead to something more. It was a typical romantic-comedy plot after all: Brooding guy falls for bright and sunny girl or vice versa after playing the role of ‘husband-and-wife’ to escape trouble only to create more chaos! _It fit perfectly._

Sure… things will eventually backfire and there’ll be confusion and lots of denial ( _on Yoona’s part_ , she predicted) but all of that could only make things more interesting. She turned at a corner and let her window down, letting the cool morning breeze waft into the interior of her car. Besides, the hero and heroine in the story will always find their way to one another – no matter how much trouble and confusion they go through, because they are _meant to be_.

Hyoyeon wasn’t sure yet if they _were_ – ‘meant to be’ that is– but she had ways to find out. Yoona had always said that she had a knack of getting even a rock to talk and she’s always been proud of this particular ability. Maybe that’s the reason why she was so happy this morning – because nothing else could make her happier (aside from Eunhyuk, chocolate chip cookies and new shoes) than a makeover.

She grinned, slowing down to a stop near a salon and waved at the sober man standing anxiously and out of place outside the building. Who else would be a perfect candidate for a makeover than Mr. Broody himself?

“Good morning, Broodinator!” Hyoyeon said, waving as she stepped out of her vehicle. Changmin regarded her with a nod, shifting from one foot to the other. She eyed him and noticed the presence of the small whiteboard he carried everywhere. “Aigoo. Why can’t you just talk like a regular human being?”

He rolled his eyes and shrugged, running a hand through his shoulder length hair. His arm wrapped around his board, as if for protection.

Hyoyeon shook her head. “Geez, you really are weird. Oh well, anything is fine as long as we can communicate one way or another.”

When he didn’t respond, she shrugged as well and turned towards the door. _Say good-bye to that hobo look, Changmin_ , Hyoyeon thought, grinning mischievously.

It was a few days ago, after an Anatomy class that ran late and the three of them were walking towards their respective cars. Changmin wasn’t driving his own car, it was Yoona’s but seeing him wait outside the university was so common now – she hadn’t bothered to ask why he walked them there. It was during that short walk that Hyoyeon hinted innocently the idea of a haircut (“I’m thinking of getting a bob. What do you think?”) and Yoona suddenly commented on the length of his. It had begun to curl over his nape and although “it was attractive on him” (Yoona had said this with a slow breath that only served to pique Hyoyeon’s interest over the two even more) – she wasn’t so sure her “father would find it appropriate”.

Changmin wasn’t excited about the prospect of cutting his hair, but Hyoyeon had expected that kind of response. She even half-expected him not to arrive at all, but if her instincts were as good as she was proud of them –she knew that if Yoona asked him to come, he would. He didn’t seem to know how to say “No” to her friend at this point in time and may never will.

Hyoyeon laughed to herself, understanding fully well that was the case and pulled on his sleeve. “Let’s go get your hair cut, Broodster.”

The way his expression turned sour only added to her laughter as she dragged him into the salon. Hyoyeon grinned as thoughts of her _plan_ ran through her mind.

_Oh Broody. I am going to have fun torturing you._

* * *

The day was turning out to be a particularly uneventful one as far as Yoona was concerned. It was a beautiful Saturday—perfect climate, birds chirping merrily and (for once) an off day from exams and experiments—but now that her morning visit with her father was over, she had the rest of the day to… bum around before she had to stop by again. She frowned at the thought as she stepped very slowly across the expanse of a bridge connecting two wards together. Yoona was not the type to just bum around.

 _I wonder if I should check in on Sooyoung_ , she considered, glancing at her watch for the time. It was only half-past ten and she had plenty of time ( _all day_ , in fact); a little catching up with her boyfriend’s sister wasn’t so bad and besides she liked Sooyoung a lot.

“Boyfriend.” Yoona repeated the word slowly, letting it roll off her tongue and stopped walking mid-step. In her mind she saw two men’s faces (one was bright and smiling, while the other rolled his eyes and smirked) and pursed her lips, thinking it ridiculous how a person could say one word and think of two people at the same time.

_Well, technically Donghae and I are broken up and Changmin’s my boyfriend now – it’s not fair to give him that title since he’s just pretending—because I asked him to, okay. This is partly my idea—but Donghae really asked me to be his girlfriend – he’s a jerk, seeing someone else behind my back. Changmin’s a really nice guy, despite his non-talking and really handso—_

She put a hand over her face and sighed, shaking her head. Her thoughts were running wild and away from her and it gave her a headache. She was only confusing herself; and it certainly doesn’t help her situation at all. Whether Donghae is the bad guy or Changmin is her ‘boyfriend’ or ‘partner-in-crime’ or whatever he was… it isn’t something she should stress over too much. It was no one’s fault after all; time and space led her to this moment and Yoona simply did have any control over it even if she wanted to.

She resumed walking, closing her eyes and rubbing her temple as her headache pounded. If she hadn’t closed her eyes for too long, Yoona wouldn’t have collided hard with a slim and equally distracted woman staring down solemnly at the floor. “Ow.” The woman said, rubbing her forehead while Yoona did the same and blinked in confusion. “I’m sorry—I wasn’t looking at where I was going.”

Yoona shook her head, waving her free hand in front of her and smiling sheepishly. She bowed modestly in apology. “No, it was my fault too. I wasn’t looking either and I’ve got a harder skull. I’m sure I did more damage to you than you to me.”

“Please, you don’t have to apologize. It’s only a red spot, it’ll fade in an hour or so.” She said, pointing at her forehead and laughing (the sound was melodious and slightly high-pitched). Yoona grinned guiltily and straightened her posture. The woman was dressed fashionably ( _probably all designer brands_ , she guessed), with a crème white blouse, skinny jeans and black silk flats. Her hair was light brown and tumbled down her shoulders in waves, and when she smiled Yoona felt a sense of familiarity. “I’m lost, to be honest. It’s been a while since I’ve been in a hospital in Korea and I’ve forgotten where the cafeteria is.”

“Oh? The main cafeteria is in the ground floor, behind the garden. There’s also a small cafeteria in this floor across the bridge,” Yoona replied, pointing at a two-door entrance behind her, “but I’m afraid the food here isn’t very… how shall I say this? Savory?”

The woman laughed again, wrinkling her nose. “I was only hoping to get a good hot cup of coffee while waiting for my mother’s appointment to finish but…” she shrugged, smiling and shook her head, “I’m afraid I’ll lose my appetite if I eat hospital food, let alone, drinks now.”

“Actually, there’s a very good café just beside the hospital. I was planning on going there after visiting a friend of mine but I can always go later. Besides, I feel sorry for causing you physical harm.” Yoona smiled, holding out her hand in greeting, “My name is Im Yoona. Why don’t we have some coffee and pass the time?”

The woman nodded, smiling brilliantly as she brought her own hand out to shake hers. “My name is Jung Sooyeon, but you can call me Jessica.”

 

* * *

 

She frequented this particular establishment because of Eunhyuk (he had his hair cut regularly, and often got ready for their dates there). So when the clerk saw them walk in, she recognized her immediately and were whisked into a corner not a moment later with Changmin sitting uncomfortably in a chair and waiting for the hair stylist to cut. Hyoyeon smirked at him and took a seat beside his chair, flipping through a magazine she found wedged between the mirror and wall. He looked nervous and annoyed all at the same time thinking about the prospect of cutting his hair.

“Relax, Broody. They’re not going to cut your ear off, I promise. You’ve already decided to disregard your ability to speak; we don’t need for you to lose your sense of hearing too.” She said while eyeing the piece of jewelry photographed on the page of the magazine. She raised an eyebrow when he grunted in response and rolled his eyes. He had a pen out and was writing a message – his hand movements faster that she’s ever seen anyone write before. She vaguely wished she had the same ability so she wouldn’t have to ask Yoona to copy her notes all the time.

/Let’s make this quick. I have to be home before Yuri talks Minho and the customers half to death at the Music Store./ It said, the white background of his board glaring back at her as she read his message.

“Aww, come on! She won’t bore your customers to death! If you hadn’t noticed, your sister’s hot and I bet that you’ll get more people in your store if you had her around more often.” Hyoyeon replied, wiggling her eyebrows.

Changmin heaved a resigned sigh and shook his head. /I know how attractive she is, Hyoyeon but I really didn’t need to hear it from you. Minho’s already told me too many times and it only gives me headaches./

“Dude, she’s eighteen. She’s allowed to have more than one boyfriend in a lifetime you know.”

/She’s still a child./

“Wow… Yoona’s right. You look all mean and tough on the outside but you’re really just a big softie, aren’t you?” Hyoyeon said; her eyes wide in mock surprise. “You know, Yoona really likes nice guys. If you keep this up, I’m sure she’ll like you too.”

The tips of his ears immediately flared red although his face stayed serious; his eyes piercing through hers from the mirror in annoyance or trepidation ( _Maybe both_ , she thought and smirking). Hyoyeon grinned at his reflection and made a ‘tsk, tsk’ sound as she put down her magazine. “Don’t worry, Changmin. I know how to keep a secret.” She winked at him and laughed out loud when he rolled his eyes. She pulled one of his ears. “Dude, you’re totally blushing! Look at your ears!”

Changmin swatted her hand away, tilting his head the other way. He glared at her obvious enjoyment at torturing him and quickly wrote another message. /Please stop harassing me./

“Oh but I enjoy it,” she argued, her tone light and mischievous as he rolled his eyes again.

 _This is going to be a long day_ , Changmin thought and took in a deep breath. He stared at himself in the mirror and wondered why he had to go through this crazy person’s need to makeover an innocent bystander. Granted, the long hair was getting on his nerves but he didn’t care to have it cut, let alone, styled. Why did he have to go through this? _Because_ she _said it would look better_ , his mind supplied, _because Yoona thinks it will look good on you. That’s why you’re here at the mercy of her best friend. You want to make her happy—even if this whole thing is just a sham to present to her father._

Happy? What does a haircut have to do with making anyone happy? He cursed in his mind and closed his eyes, trying to steady the slight jump in his chest just by the thought of her name.

Changmin could still feel the light brush of her fingers against his cheek when he thought about her. The warmth of her fingertips still imprinted against his skin even though it’s already been days and a several showers later. _This girl... she’s trouble._ Unconsciously his lips curled into a small smile at the thought, and he found that a part of him (a small or big part, he couldn’t be sure) didn’t mind at all.

“You like her more than you let on, don’t you Changmin?” Hyoyeon said suddenly, surprising Changmin out of his thoughts. He stared at her in surprise, feeling another one of those ‘jumps’ in his chest comes to life. He didn’t know what to think or write and she knew this clearly. Changmin felt a wave of nausea at the sight of her wicked grin widening.

The hairstylist appeared not a moment later and he resigned in his seat. Beside him, Hyoyeon stood up to give the stylist her instructions. (“I want him to look like he’s from this generation and not a hobo, okay? Something cool looking but you can still run your hand through his—oh God no, he’s not mine. He’s Yoona’s—you know, big eyes, gorgeous figure—yep, that’s the one. Anyway, he has to look presentable for my best friend. Lord knows she needs more sexy times in her lifetime—Haha, I know right! But back to the hair—” He tuned her out before he felt the need to hit her or escape or both.) And then while the stylist nodded and went to work on his hair, Hyoyeon leaned back against her chair.

She had guessed that he would find her statement shocking and expected him to go on severe silent mode instantaneously. She had to ease into it… that’s how you get people to tell you what you want to know. She tapped him on the arm, looking at him innocently.

“Why don’t I tell you the story of how Yoona and I met to pass the time? It was right across the street, actually—” She pointed beyond the glass windows and to a half-hidden café sitting just across the building. Changmin strained his eyes to the side just to steal a peek; the hairstylist carefully tapped him to straighten in his seat promptly. “I used to work there part-time in high school, and she came in every Thursday afternoon for an espresso. I thought she was so strange since most high school students during that time would have never ordered an espresso in the morning.”

“She usually sat a corner table in the back, but that particular Thursday she sat outside. I was running late for my shift and saw her sipping her coffee at one of those dingy chairs. And when she nodded in my direction as I approached, I couldn’t help but blurt out a ‘Aren’t you too young to order and drink an espresso?’.” Hyoyeon’s lips curled into a smile as she remembered Yoona’s slow smirk to her outburst. “I thought she’d get angry but instead she shrugged and said that an espresso was exactly the right type of bitter drink she needed after a day of extra classes in Math. I didn’t know what came over me next because after she said that I was suddenly sitting at her table complaining about school and boys with her. Needless to say, I did get in for my shift or get my paycheck that day.”

/She has a thing for bitter drinks./ Changmin smiled, remembering how often she would stop by the café he worked at mornings and ask for a cup of coffee before her classes. She would always catch his eye and smile (he’d smile back every time and his friend, Kyuhyun, would wonder out loud why his waiter is making “google” eyes at some chick) before taking a sip from her tumbler and leaving. /She said the bitter taste calmed her nerves./

“She has weird tastes, that girl… but she’s the best. I don’t know why Donghae could ever hurt her the way he did. It’s cruel.” Hyoyeon said this more to herself than to him, he noticed. Her bright expression dimming as each word fell off her lips. Changmin sat stonily and stared off elsewhere. “You know about Donghae, right?”

He nodded once, and she sighed. “My boyfriend, Eunhyuk, is close friends with Donghae. They’ve known each other since they were children and work at the same office too. He probably knows why Donghae broke up with Yoona and he’d tell me if I ever asked, but I don’t think I should bother.” Hyoyeon shook her head and looked over at his solemn face. “Any man who hurts my friend is dead to me. Especially if said man breaks her heart.”

Changmin could hear the gravity in her voice and he turned his head slightly to look her in the eyes. She stared at him dead on and spoke in a lower tone, “You won’t break her heart, right?”

 _It’s only for show._ He thought, staring back at her unflinching. _There are no real feelings involved._

“I know it’s just a—” She cleared her throat and glanced at the stylist (he seemed immersed in his finishing touches) and continued, “I know it’s a new relationship and feelings haven’t exactly _deeply_ developed yet but… you won’t hurt her, right?”

He lowered his eyes for a moment, thinking— _I won’t hurt her. I don’t think I can._ —before looking back into her gaze. She squinted, her serious expression slowly turning into a softer one as she understood. She smiled, patting his arm and winking. “I was right.”

The hairstylist backed away and brushed off any stray cut hair from Changmin’s shoulders. Hyoyeon nodded approvingly at his new haircut and gave the stylist a ‘thumbs up’ sign. Changmin stared at his reflection, taking in the sight of his changed look and ran a hand through it. He said nothing as he stood up slowly and bowed at the salon staff as Hyoyeon paid and thanked them for their service. They stepped out into the sunlight moments later.

“It’s okay, you know,” She said suddenly, breathing in the fresh air and ruffling his newly styled hair. She gave him a ‘thumbs up’ sigh as well and smirked. “It’s okay if you feel something more, Changmin. If you want to like her, then you should. There’s no harm in feeling for another person.”

/I have no idea what you’re talking about./ But he did, he wasn’t stupid. The jumps in his chest weren’t there for no reason. He’s felt this before way back then but not as intensely. Not like they are now. And apparently, Kim Hyoyeon seemed to know this too. She skipped towards her car and slid inside in one smooth movement. She winked at him again and waved.

“Some advice though: When you tell her you love her… say it, don’t write it.”

Changmin found himself smiling as she drove away.

 

* * *

 

“I’ve been living in the States for the past ten years with my parents, working on improving my designer label in New York.” Jessica said, sipping her coffee slowly. The café Yoona brought them was quaint; cozy and quiet – perfect for a short getaway from the hustle and bustle of the Metropolitan Seoul streets. She hummed happily as the warm liquid slid down her throat just right before setting the cup back on its’ platter. “But after my mother got sick, I didn’t want to leave her alone in the house anymore and opted to come back to live here instead. My father stayed in the U.S. for his job and I put my collection on hold.”

Yoona nodded, impressed at her companion for having developed her career on her own in a foreign country. They had only sat together for a less than half an hour and already she knew that Jessica Jung was a beautiful, successful and well-mannered woman. “That’s amazing, unni… you’re so successful at such a young age. You seem so grounded too; leaving your job to take care of your mother. It’s honorable.” she said, smiling.

Jessica shook her head and laughed. “Not really. I’ve always been a little bit more like my dad—kind of a workaholic—that’s how I got so far at this age.” She put her hands on the table and studied them for a moment, gathering her thoughts. She touched the links of her diamond-studded watch and pursed her lips. “But I’ve learned how difficult it is to balance work and love—you can’t have both and not work at it. I had to distance myself from people I love just to get ahead… and well, I love my mom very much.”

“Has she been sick for very long?” Yoona asked, quickly recognizing the distress etched across her features. Her father had the same expression when her mother had fallen ill—and she could never forget that face. Tentatively she reached over and patted her hand comfortingly. It has only been an hour but Yoona had felt a tug of familiarity towards her and she did not want to ignore it.

“I’m sorry if I am being too bold. But, you look like you need to talk about it with someone. My father is sick and staying at the hospital too. I know how it feels… to feel powerless because you can only do so much for someone you love. I find that it helps when you have someone you can speak to.”

“I’ve only been here a couple of weeks. I haven’t had time to really befriend anyone yet.” Jessica smiled gratefully, brushing away at her eyes. “My mother… she has been a stoic state since we started living overseas. But it’s gotten worse a year ago. It’s hard to look at her sometimes, because she used to be so beautiful and full of life. It’s not the same person who brought me up during my formative years. She’s been… very ill. At least, her doctor said, mentally.”

Jessica’s hand wrapped around hers as she spoke; never noticing the slow pain passing through Yoona’s beautiful face. She felt a churn in her stomach, a painful but not surprising ball of emotion forming as she listened. She remembered feeling this way before.

“They say she suffers from a case of manic depression, and it’s been difficult for our family. There are days when she has high spirits, but there are also days where she crashes and burns so quickly I’m usually afraid. I’ve never spent as much time with her in the past ten years till now in Korea… but I’ve always missed her.”

Yoona pulled her hand away as Jessica leaned back against her chair and stared out the window. The day had gone by without her notice, and several tens of people were already going about their day swiftly. She briefly remembered Saturdays spent playing in the park with her sister and eating sandwiches their mother made—when she remembered, if she got out of bed… Yoona took a deep breath, brushing a lone tear trailing down her cheek. “Most manic episodes are triggered by life changes, such as childbirth or death of a loved one.”

Jessica nodded. She got hold of her purse and pulled out a photograph. It was badly creased, as if it had been crumpled and smoothed out in a person’s hand for a long period of time repeatedly. In the image was a girl, a boy and beautiful woman holding them both close to her. They were all smiling—the girl, Yoona guessed, was Jessica and the woman her mother, but the boy… she felt the tug of familiarity in her heart once again.

“Your brother?” Yoona asked, looking up at her curiously. Her voice was tinged with an emotion she couldn’t contain and surprised her. Jessica nodded slowly, and she handed the photograph back. “Did he die?”

She shrugged, smoothing a crease on the image. “My mother seems to think so…”

“So he’s alive?”

Jessica never answered her question, and Yoona never pushed for an answer any further. Instead, they sat together in silence—watching the people go about their lives in the late morning breeze.

 

* * *

 

Changmin feels a little uncomfortable, standing outside the large wooden doors of a church he’s never seen before (he’s never been to this part of town either). He looked around, squinting to peek through a thin wedge between the doors. She had sent him a message to meet there and yet she was nowhere to be found. He had begun to seriously rethink his—thoughts? Intentions? What were they exactly?—and sighed, stepping down from the stone steps one by one.

[Where are you?] He typed, staring down at the white screen glaring at him. He waited for her reply, running a hand across his nape and feeling slightly naked without the usual clump of hair that used to be there. _I wonder how she’ll take this new… hair_? He thought unconsciously but then shook his head at how ridiculous it sounded. Still, what she thought mattered—he had to look his best. She was his ‘girlfriend’ after all.

He ignored the feeling of affection swelling in his chest. _Girlfriend._ Then his phone beeped.

[There’s a garden behind the church. I’ll be there, waiting by daisies.]

Changmin found himself stepping into a place surrounded by flowers and light moments later. He looked around slowly, stepping carefully across the patio—catching sight of Yoona sitting on a bench and touching daisies with her fingertips. She saw him as he approached and gave him a small smile in greeting, her eyes dim and her demeanor melancholy.

Yoona reached up to touch his hair the moment he sat down and set his board beside him, her smile widening in approval. “It looks really good,” she said, staring at him and brushing his hair away from his forehead—her touch lingering against his cheek for a moment before she removed her hand and looked away. “Hyoyeon did good with styling your hair. She’d make a perfect coordinator if she ever decides to leave Medicine.”

She leaned forward and touched the daisies growing at the side of their bench and picked one, twirling the stem between her fingers. She had the most sorrowful expression on her face that didn’t fit her beautiful features. Changmin watched her solemnly, waiting for her to speak.

“My sister and I used to play after Church with our mom when she was still alive. We would run around in our best dresses and make flower wreathes—just as long as we promised to help plant more flowers to replace that ones we picked. They’re the best memories I have left of my mother.”

Yoona cleared her throat, brushing her hair back behind her ear. “I told you that she died when I was child, right?” When he nodded, she continued, “Most people think children only remember the good times of their childhood and none of the bad. I think otherwise because I remember everything.”

“She killed herself—overdosed actually, with a whole bottle of potent sleeping pills.”

Then she let out a laugh, her body shaking visibly and Changmin moved to wrap his arms around her. She did not protest (he hadn’t expected her to; he tightened his hold around her) and shook in his arms, breathing in ragged breaths and mournful sobs. They stayed still like this for a while, until her breath calmed and she stopped shaking.

“Sorry… I laughed because I met someone today whose mother reminded me of my own. I hadn’t thought about her in a while… I thought I had forgotten her.” Yoona whispered, moving away from him only slightly to adjust herself before tilting her head to rest on his shoulder. Changmin breathed in deeply, rubbing the small of her back comfortingly and listening to her words. “My father doesn’t know that I know the reason of her death. I kept it a secret for so long I almost forgot about it.”

She giggled, lifting her head from his shoulder to look at him. He stared back at her watery eyes and pink nose, smiling at him. “You know this is the part where you put one of your earbuds in my ear and we listen to some song you’ve got in your playlist that hits the right note in a situation. You don’t have one this time?” she said, her tone light but serious. Almost hopeful.

He let his lips curl into a small smile and pulled out his pen.

/I don’t have one for right now… but I can tell you one of my secrets./

Her eyes lit up a little as she nodded and settled her head back onto his shoulder. “What is it?”

/My adoptive mother isn’t dead. She left us, her family, for another./

“Do they know?” she whispered, thinking about Sooyoung and Yuri—his sisters and her friends. Changmin shrugged, pulling her close with an arm around her waist.

/They do, but like you they never let our father know that they knew. We’ve kept it a secret for so long, it doesn’t matter if she really died or not./

Yoona nodded slowly, tracing the words on the board with her fingertips. “Is that why you don’t talk? Because you had to keep it a secret and decided it was better to just stay mute forever?”

She looked up at him for an answer but instead received a smile and soft kiss on her forehead. She blinked in surprise, and reached for the spot where his lips touched her skin—more surprised that she found it was a welcome gesture and not as an intrusion. Her lips curled into another one of her smiles and she shook her head, pinching his nose. She laughed as he swatted her hand away.

“A secret for another time…” she said, ruffling his hair and laughing, “You sure know how to shut someone up, don’t you?”

As their Saturday drew to a close with the afternoon sky swirling colors of blues and pinks around them, Changmin only pulled her closer… and that she realized, she also didn’t mind.

 

* * *

 

(“Flight E34D6 from New York City has arrived at Platform A2 at 20:00 hours.”

She tilted her neck to look over the people bustling out of the gates. It was a beautiful evening and her mother was safe at home – she had all the time in the world at her fingertips for now and she wanted nothing more than to curl warm into her couch, beside the man she loved with all her heart.

He saw her before she saw him and they ran to each other in quiet desperation, all smiles and kisses as they said hello. “You’re back,” she whispered, burying her head at the crook of his neck and smiled. His only response was to hug her tighter and breathe her in.

A man laughed from behind and shaking his head as he approached them. He hit them with his passport in one swift movement and laughed when they turned their heads to glare at him menacingly. “Donghae. Jessica. Could you guys be all lovey-dovey after we’ve all gone back to our homes? I’ve been dying to see my Hyoyeon hours ago.” He said, pointing towards the direction of the exit.

“You kill the mood, Eunhyuk,” Donghae said, rolling his eyes. Eunhyuk only shrugged in response and waved goodbye, walking away quickly as he dialed a number on his phone. Moments later, he guffawed and the pair he left behind could only imagine that his call had gotten through. “What a guy,” He said under his breath, grinning at his friend before grabbing her hand and started walking towards the exit.

“What happened while I was gone?” he asked, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pressing a kiss on the side of her head. Jessica hummed and shrugged, entwining her fingers in his as they stepped out into the moonlight. She turned to him, smiling—kissing him softly.

“I found him.”)


	5. Chapter 5

Yoona stared at her cellphone’s screen for a whole minute, trying to come up with something witty to say that early morning. It was five am, and it was cool out – the early morning sunlight just starting to break into the dark sky. The stark white screen made her eyes water slightly and she sighed, burying her face into her pillow for the nth time.

This would probably not be the last time she did this, but at the moment she didn’t care. At the moment, all Yoona cared about is whether she could make up her mind long enough to type a ‘Good morning’ message to Changmin or to Donghae – seeing as he was back from his business trip and Eunhyuk had just so happened to come by last night to steal her best friend away from her all the while hinting that ‘ _the great fish alien’s really sorry for what he did_ ’.

She knows she probably shouldn’t forgive him – much less talk to him yet – but this was Lee Donghae… she had loved him for two years. It wasn’t something she could just let go in almost two months’ time.

And then there was Changmin. Changmin with his tall frame, his dark eyes, his broad shoulders, his warm hands, his uneven smile… In less than two months, he had become such a fixture in her life that it was almost impossible for her to imagine never meeting him that night. Yoona wasn’t sure if things were going to fast or if this was just how things progressed in some relationships. She hadn’t been in many – Donghae was her first – and so this was new to her. She surprised herself for not feeling uncomfortable around him… sometimes there was awkwardness, but those moments never lasted long. Yoona wondered why it was this way.

“I’m over-thinking this.” Yoona murmured to herself, sitting upright on her bed and sighing. She looked around her bedroom, stark-white and unusually neat at the moment, and felt a sense of resignation. She stepped down her bed, padding towards her closet – opening it without thinking and picked out clothes to wear for the day.

She had another one of those fortunate off days from school and she was determined to go about it alone. At least, for the time being, so she could clear her head.

However, it seemed like fate had other plans.

Yoona’s eyes strayed over to her dresser – onto the framed photographs standing on top of it and on to those she simply stuck on the wall. There were the photos of her and her sister, her father, her mother… snapshots with Hyoyeon at various events throughout their highschool days, some with of them with Donghae (she strained her eyes away from those)– and then there were the polaroids she took with Changmin’s sisters… and of course, Changmin.

Her eyes stayed on one of such polaroid. This one was after he had gotten his haircut and they had gone to the hospital to check on Sooyoung. The sisters had teased him mercilessly – slapping his nape jokingly and laughing. Yoona had tried not to laugh as Changmin decided to mock-wrestle Yuri, pinning her head under his arm while grabbing Sooyoung who tried to wriggle away from his grasp, and instead she took pictures. Somehow Yuri had managed to get away and asked for the camera, demanding that her brother and she sit next to each other for a picture.

He put his arms around her waist and she leaned back against him like it was the most natural thing in the world. She remembered the soothing drum of her heart beat pick up during that soft contact and she felt herself blush. Picking the image up in her hands, she stared down at it; biting her lip from letting a small smile creep into her face. Instead, Yoona pursed her lips – tracing the outline of their picture together.

Suddenly, she thought of something to say.

[Good morning. I think it’s time you meet my dad… What do you think?] Yoona watched as the little envelope disappeared from the screen. Moments later, a new envelope appeared on her screen.

[I think I’m ready to meet your father. But somehow I’m nervous. Oh, and good morning to you too.]

Yoona let out a chuckle – picturing his anxious face before typing another message. [Don’t be. You’ll do fine. You know everything you should know.]

A new envelope. [Mr. Im will be the judge of that.]

[Do you have work until late today?]

[No. The construction site’s closed for the day. I’ll be at the café instead. Why? Do you miss me already?]

[Not really. ㄱㄱ]

His reply was quick. [I’ll see you later then. And I missed you too, Choding. ^^]

There was the soothing drum again. Yoona patted her cheek with one hand and took a deep breath. How would he know when she didn’t know for sure herself? [You are a tiresome flirt, Broody. (Also we need better nicknames.)]

[하하하 I think having Hyoyeon around when I visit you at your university has given me that side effect. You like it though. (I think so too.)]

She did. This she had to admit, and she shook her head. [Aigoo. I’ll see you later. ^__^ (I’ll call you 기린!)]

[YAH. (사슴!)]

[I was kidding! But aren’t they in the same animal family? How about 달링~?♥]

She could imagine him shaking his head at her reply and waited patiently for his. When it arrived, her heart skipped a beat.

[여보.♥ See you later.]

Yoona watched her reflection in the mirror, with her flushed cheeks and pursed lips keeping in a smile. They were certainly comfortable with one another; that fact was for certain. Her eyes leapt towards the picture in her hand once again and stuck it on the side of her mirror. She sighed in contentment, shaking her head while smiling.

“Maybe I’m over-thinking this… but, it’s nice to feel this again. Even if it is just pretend…”

Moments later, as she finished preparing to go out for the day, the doorbell rang. Curiously, she peeked out of her window and squinted at the person standing at the door. The magnolia tree her family had in their lawn had gotten so big and was blooming – it made it impossible to recognize who the person was. And so she bounded down the stairs, her hair fluttering about her shoulders.

“Who is it?” Yoona asked upon the third doorbell, yanking the door open. She lifted her eyes – and immediately wished she hadn’t.

Lee Donghae stood with a small smile, his hand up in greeting. He looked as devastatingly handsome as the last time she saw him – the night he broke her heart and left her to pick up the pieces alone. She opened her mouth and couldn’t find her voice to speak.

“Yoona,” he said her name softly, “Hello.”

 

* * *

 

Minho was not the type to poke around someone else’s business when it didn’t involve him, and normally he would have turned a blind eye when a good friend of his starts absentmindedly wiping the café’s windows with a faraway and melancholy look in his eyes. But today was no ordinary day (these kinds of days were happening more frequently, he noticed and grinned) and seeing Changmin – Silent sadist Shim Changmin – in an almost dreamlike state was beyond reasonable circumstances.

Shim Changmin was whipped. He was head-over-heels and then some. Minho knew what it looked like (he saw it on his face everyday when he got ready for a date with Yuri), and the grin on his face could only go a little more at cutting his face in half if it were physically possible.

 _Heck, we’re practically brothers!_ Minho thought, tossing the washcloth into the sink in the back and wiping his hands on a towel. He turned back to look at Changmin starting to wipe the same window for the nth time and grinned, shaking his head as he unfastened his apron. _I might as well tell him that he looks like an idiot standing there before any of the customers notice and think he’s weird._

“Changmin-hyung.” He placed his hand on the older man shoulder, snapping him out of his reverie and wiggled an eyebrow at him. Minho tilted his head towards a door at the back. “Let’s go take a break, yeah? Kyu-hyung’s got some sandwiches reserved for us at the back.”

Changmin looked at him distractedly but nodded nevertheless, turning towards the door. He was able to remove his apron and dispose of the rag he was using just moments ago in one sweep as his long limbs took him past customers, the bar and then to the door. When Minho caught up with him at the back room, he was already half-way done with a ham and cheese sandwich. Cho Kyuhyun, their friend and the manager, stared at him in confusion for a moment before looking back at their silent friend munching away. “What’s wrong with him?” he asked, crossing his arms and stood beside the younger man. Minho shrugged as Kyuhyun nudged him with an elbow.

“He’s been like that a lot lately.”

Kyuhyun frowned, raising an eyebrow at Changmin. He was still, tending to his sandwich with an intense stare, his eyes could have burned a hole thru the paper wrapping. Kyuhyun knew Changmin well enough to know how serious and brooding he could be, but this was beyond what he was used to. This was… He tapped a finger on his chin and narrowed his eyes. “He’s got a girl.”

Minho grinned, nodding immediately and leaned back against the wall. “You’ve seen her around. Her name’s Im Yoona. She comes to the café every weekday morning, and hyung always serves her coffee. They’ve been going out for almost two months now—and around a month ago, he started acting this weird.”

“So… that would mean that he likes her a little more than he liked the others before.” Kyuhyun felt a grin creep into his lips. He quickly glanced at their friend and smirked. “Since Min’s never had a girl for more than a week, let alone a month.”

At his corner, Changmin continued eating: carefully unwrapping another sandwich just before he finished the last one, painfully oblivious to his surroundings as his friends talked about him.

“Seems like it. Yuri put up a photo wall or something in his room the other day. There were a bunch of photos she took from whenever they visited Sooyoung at the hospital at the same time.” Minho wrinkled his nose, smirking. “Judging by the fact that he didn’t object to Yul redecorating his room; I’d say he likes his _girlfriend_ a whole lot.”

“Why are you enunciating the word ‘girlfriend’?”

“No reason. Yoona’s the first girl he’s introduced to Yuri and Sooyoung… so she’s basically _the girlfriend_.”

Kyuhyun nodded, thinking it over and agreeing. The pair continued to watch their friend pick up another sandwich and bite into it. “I guess you’re right. Changmin’s never really introduced anyone to his sisters before.”

“He didn’t like them much.”

“True. They were just around when we hung out.”

Minho sighed, shaking his head. “Changmin-hyung has this magic power. Chicks flock him even when he doesn’t speak.”

The older man laughed, rolling his eyes at the thought and shrugged. “True. Must be all that brooding he does. He’s the King of Melancholy, that Shim Changmin. Anyway, at least Sooyoung likes the girl… that’s what’s important.”

Not a second later he felt a small paper ball hit his forehead and Kyuhyun blinked in confusion. Looking up to see who threw the ball, he saw Changmin staring pointedly at him and holding up his ever-present whiteboard. He tapped on the board’s surface and smirked. /You didn’t even visit her when she was in the hospital. I’m pretty sure Yuri’s hinted that you come for days before we took her home last week. Aren’t you supposed to be in love with her?/

“I do… not like her that much.”

/Just a lot, right?/

Kyuhyun’s ears flared red as he coughed and looked away, squinting to look at the menu he put up next to the door. Minho laughed loudly beside him, shaking his head as he slapped his thigh in mirth. The younger mind paid no attention at the glare he was receiving from his friend and boss, and continued to clutch his stomach. Kyuhyun rolled his eyes and threw the paper ball back at Changmin while at the same time, hitting Minho on the stomach with his elbow.

As Minho yelped in pain, Kyuhyun narrowed his eyes at his silent friend and smirked. “So what’s the deal with this Yoona girl?”

With the way Changmin shrugged—the action slightly jerky and tense—it only made him raise an eyebrow and determined to prod the subject on. Throwing a quick glance at his other employees busying themselves at the bar and customers, Kyuhyun took a seat in front of Changmin and snatched the third sandwich he was munching on away; clicking his tongue as the taller man glared at him.

“What’s with the secrecy, Shim? Is she paying you to be her boyfriend or something?” He asked, punching him jokingly on the arm and laughing.

But if looks could kill, Cho Kyuhyun would have already dropped dead.

“Woah. Dude, I was kidding. There’s no need for the Shim Death Glare.” Kyuhyun put his hands up defensively, waving them across his face.

Changmin took a deep breath and closed his eyes, rubbing two fingers against his forehead before leaning back against his chair. Why was he stressing out in the first place? Nothing had gone wrong in the past weeks he’s spent with her, and yet somehow it’s become more than that. He’s become more aware of her: aware of her eyes, her smile, her habit of biting on her lower lip when she’s scanning a menu – aware of the way her hand feels a little too at home in his…

 _This is all Hyoyeon’s fault._ Changmin frowned, shaking his head more to at himself than to anyone. _She’s gotten me to think about_ —(“It’s okay if you feel something more, Changmin. If you want to like her, then you should.” – “When you tell her you love her… say it, don’t write it.”)— _Ugh._

And then there was after his haircut, at that park bench under sunlight and daisies – he kissed her on the forehead! Where the hell did that come from? Sure, it wasn’t a _real_ kiss but the action was strange enough as it was. Changmin was always one who knew to control himself, and he didn’t go around giving kisses to just anyone. He vaguely tried to remember if he had kissed his last girlfriend (Her name was Victoria, Kyuhyun’s friend, and they had lasted only for four measly days – no, there was no real kiss then either; let alone a hug)… and yet, he had gone and kissed his pretend girlfriend anyway.

Things began to change after that, although it remained the same all at the same time. Sooyoung was discharged from the hospital and went back to college and her part time job. Yuri was busy with herself and Minho and school. And Yoona was… she lived up to her promise to help pay the hospital bills and he was eternally grateful for that – but somehow, it was more than that now. Changmin found himself wanting to be around her more often – visiting her after class and bringing her coffee; getting to know more about her through night walks in the park or around the hospital when she visited her father. She was there, beautiful and caring all the time, and he…

Just a few hours earlier she had called him 달링 ( _jokingly_ , Changmin grumbled in his head) and he, in return, called her 여보. _What was up with that?_

This was getting out of hand. He couldn’t risk their plan by feeling something for her. That wasn’t part of the deal. She helped him pay for the bills and he paid it back by pretending to be her boyfriend for her father. It was as simple as that! Besides, he was going to meet him soon, Mr. Im, and he knew practically every basic thing he needed to know about her to be her boyfriend but he had to keep control—he had to keep himself at arm’s length.

He couldn’t like her in that way. And even though a part of him (it was growing everyday, this part) didn’t mind the thought – enjoyed it even – it just wasn’t _right_. It isn’t real.

At least… it isn’t real to her.

Changmin uncapped his pen and started to write slowly, his strokes deliberate on the board, while his friends watched him in silent curiosity.

/This time’s different./ The words were bolded against the white expanse of the board when he turned it over to show it them. Changmin knocked his head back lightly against the wall as his friends read, sighing wistfully. /It’s only been a few weeks. It shouldn’t feel this… serious, right?/

Both Minho and Kyuhyun exchanged looks, blinking at each other before looking back at him. “Serious…” They repeated, letting the word trail off for a moment or two. The thought _So it’s that serious_ running through their heads at the same time as matching grins began to form on their lips. Then they burst out laughing, patting their friend happy claps on the shoulder. Changmin stared at them in surprise, his brow furrowed close together.

“Time spent doesn’t make how the relationship becomes, hyung,” Minho said, grinning. He shook his head as the older man continued to stare at him. “It doesn’t necessarily work that way. You could be in a relationship with someone and not be truly in love with them until you’ve been married fifty years.”

“Exactly.” Kyuhyun agreed, smirking. “You don’t love someone based on the fact that you’ve known them your whole life. You love them because your heart just knows.”

/And I should listen to you because…?/ Changmin tapped his board impatiently, raising an eyebrow at his friend who immediately closed his mouth and scowled at him. He knew very well what Kyuhyun’s feelings were for his sister and enjoyed poking fun at it whenever he had the chance. He shot a glance at Minho trying hard not to laugh for the nth time at their boss and grinned. /You’re being a hypocrite, don’t you think Cho?/

“And you are so not going get your paycheck this week.” Kyuhyun retorted, punching him on the shoulder. It probably wasn’t as hard as he wanted it to be, but his point was there. “The subject is on you and your girlfriend, Shim. We’re dealing with your emotional issues against ‘love’ and what comes with it. So don’t turn this towards Sooyoung and me.”

/I probably wouldn’t if you’d just tell her already. Honestly and you think I’m the one with emotional issues./

They glared at each other levelly, waiting for the other to break the connection. Minho hit them lightly on the back their heads simultaneously, watching in amusement as they turned their death glares towards him. He pulled up two fingers formed into a V and winked. “You guys do know that there can only be one solution to your problems, right?”

“... Three words, eight letters. Ugh.” Kyuhyun groaned, burying his head in his hands. “As if that’s possible.”

“True, plus Sooyoung-noona keeps talking about some doctor she met back at the hospital.”

“That only proves my point!” He exclaimed, hitting himself with his palm. This time the groan was louder, more pained. Changmin winced as his friend punched him again, harder this time and let out a tired sigh. He glanced at the clock and wondered how much longer they were going to sit there talking about… well – they should be working anyway.

/Let’s go back to work./ He wrote, patting his friend awkwardly on the shoulder before standing up. They did the same and filed out the door, chatting aimlessly about the slow run of the café that day.

Changmin ran a hand at the back of his nape and breathed in deeply, relishing the quiet of the back room. He caught sight of his reflection on the glass of the door and stared at himself for a while. There was no visible change in his reflection, but he knew there was something different about him lately. He knew people were noticing – his sisters, Hyoyeon, Minho, Kyuhyun – everyone; even he noticed himself. However, it seemed not everyone did… especially Yoona.

His girlfriend. Pretend or not – she was his girlfriend.

And that only complicated things.

 _Get it together, Shim._ He scolded himself, glaring at his reflection and stepped out into the comfortable murmurs of the café with his whiteboard in tow. A familiar vibration ran through his jeans pocket and he fished out the little gadget into his hand. He flipped through the menus quickly before stopping. He turned to his friends standing behind the bar and reached for his board again.

/I have to leave work early. Sooyoung’s doctor said there was an anomaly in one of Sooyoung’s lab tests. I’m going to check it out./

Kyuhyun nodded, pulling out a few bills from his pocket and handing them over. He pushed it stubbornly in Changmin’s palm and shook his head when he tried to return it. “It’s just in case you need it. Let me know if there’s anything wrong, alright? And don’t even think of leaving it in the cash register on the way out – I’ll know if you did.”

Changmin gave him a grateful look and nodded, grabbing his bag from the back and sprinted towards the exit. There would be bus going round the corner any minute now if he ran for it. Changmin glanced down at his cellphone’s screen again: [There’s an anomaly in Miss Sooyoung’s lab reports. I need to talk to you immediately. Meet me at Room 5110, ASAP.] and wondered what was wrong this time. He considered sending a message to Yoona (that he might not see her if things were worse that the doctor’s message sounded) but thought against it – running across the street to catch the bus.

He didn’t want to trouble her the way their situation already did. He’ll just try to get back early to meet her. _Yes, that’s the plan._

Changmin stood in the back of the bus, grabbed the handrails overhead and glanced out the window. His gaze fell on all-too-familiar female eyes and his fist clenched unconsciously. She waved at him, mouthing words he didn’t have to hear to know what they were and what they meant. He pulled his eyes away as the bus began to move and let out a deep breath.

“My little Changmin, hello.”


	6. Chapter 6

“So… did anything happen while I was gone on business?”

Hyoyeon grinned as Eunhyuk pressed a light kiss on her shoulder.

They liked spending their (very few) free days indoors, just talking and being with one another – it gave them peace and maintained their relationship at its best. Lee Eunhyuk has been her boyfriend for four years and had been away a week recently to go on business. His job as an assistant financial associate for a multi-million company pulled him all over the world but she never complained, because he was wonderful and always came back. But that didn’t mean she didn’t miss him so much.

Because she did, a lot actually… and today, now that he was home _—“I missed you, you anchovy.” – “Hey, I resent that.”_ –well, today was just perfect.

She rolled over to her back and shrugged, drawing the sheets over shoulders. “There have been some interesting developments… but mostly because your best friend’s a bastard.”

“… so something’s happened to Yoona, huh?”

“You are correct, Mr. Lee.”

Eunhyuk sighed, laying back and rubbed his index and thumb over his nose bridge, thinking. He knew about Donghae’s decision to break up with Yoona, of course. He told him a week before he broke her heart, on a Thursday night over piles of paperwork and statistics to review. Donghae told him that he loved Yoona (“— _really I do. It’s just that—”_ ) but that there was someone else… someone from way before he came back to Seoul, before working at their company… before falling for Yoona.

Everyone had a past – and Donghae had a right to go back to his. Eunhyuk sat up and sighed loudly, causing Hyoyeon to blink at him curiously. “Donghae never meant to hurt her, Hyo.”

“He cheated on her! He was seeing someone else while dating my best friend! How is that not ‘meaning’ to hurt her?” Hyoyeon exclaimed, sitting up as well and glared at her boyfriend steadily. Eunhyuk held up his hands in defeat, leaning away just in case she decides to hit him with a pillow or something. She relaxed immediately and pouted, “Sorry, hon. What he did just really pissed me off… and Yoona doesn’t even know how he could have done that.”

“I know what you mean… but we have no say on the matter. Donghae’s made his choice – it’s his call if he wants to fix it.”

Hyoyeon nodded, setting her head on her boyfriend’s shoulder and touched the fabric of their blanket. She hated knowing that Eunhyuk was right – that even if they did want to help, they couldn’t go over and fix it for their friends. She’d seen how hard Yoona tried to hide her sadness (she would eat that fish-shaped red bean bread during their morning break everyday because Donghae had brought her one when they first started going out) and she was sure Eunhyuk had seen some reaction from Donghae too.

Donghae was a good person, even Hyoyeon had liked him for her best friend… and he probably did have a good reason…

She sighed, shaking her head. “Have you met her though?”

“Who?”

“The girl he left Yoona for.”

Eunhyuk was silent for a moment, thinking before slowly tilting his head into a slow nod. Hyoyeon figured as much and nodded as well. “What’s she like?”

“Well, she’s definitely not Yoona.”

“But…?”

He shrugged, wrapping an around his girlfriend and pressed a kiss on her forehead. His mind briefly wondered towards the way Donghae’s eyes lit up and the way he held her in the airport days ago and took a deep breath.

“But… Donghae loves her a lot more than I originally thought.”

* * *

 

Yoona felt her heart drop from underneath her and she willed herself not to turn around, slam the door on his face and cry… “Donghae.”

His name came out choked in her throat, and Yoona inwardly scolded herself for sounding so meek. The image of him stared down at her, the smile still on his face. _Oh… no._ She blinked, trying to pry herself from this hallucination – because Lee Donghae could not possibly be standing outside her door, with his devastatingly handsome smile and easygoing air. _He just couldn’t be._

“Yoona… I’m real.” Donghae said smoothly, waving a hand at her face.

Her brow furrowed, feeling a stab of anger hit her heart and she glared at him. His bright expression changed almost immediately and he quickly mouthed a ‘Sorry’ and gestured towards several envelopes tucked under the crook of his arm. Yoona eyed them curiously for a moment before bringing her eyes back to his. She crossed her arms across her chest and met his gaze coolly – ignoring the all-too-familiar thump her heart gave at his presence.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, grabbing the door frame with one hand while the other was secured to the knob. She tried not to show that her hand was shaking and waited for him to reply. Her mind was reeling; _Shit. He’s here… oh God, why is he here? He doesn’t know about Changmin… Should I call Changmin? I don’t know what to_ —

Yoona caught herself for a moment. _Why am I thinking of Changmin?_

Donghae held out a piece of paper from the envelopes and gave it to her, snapping her out of her runaway thoughts immediately. She inspected it and recognized the block handwriting of her uncle and her father’s business partner. “Mr. Jung asked me to get some files from your father’s desk and leave these envelopes here for when he returns from the hospital. I thought you’d be out today and so I came… I didn’t plan this, I swear.” He said calmly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “I have to go back to office soon, so…”

Yoona tried not to laugh at the urgency his voice wielded upon talking about work and shook her head. Looking at him straight in the eyes now, she knew he hadn’t changed. He was the same Lee Donghae she knew – still sweet despite being a workaholic, her father’s favorite associate… “You’re still the same.”

“Yeah.” He cracked a lopsided grin at her and nodded. “I swear I’ll be in and out of the house before you know it. You just have to show me to your father’s office, okay?”

She pursed her lips and nodded, stepping away from the door slowly. Donghae looked relieved at this movement and his shoulder visibly relaxed. Yoona waved a hand at him, gesturing to the inside of her house and he bowed politely. His hand patted her shoulder for a split second as he went in, the gesture casual and… normal. Except they shouldn’t be casual yet… not yet.

Yoona closed her eyes for a moment as she closed the door and breathed in deeply. She pulled out her phone and stared down at Changmin’s name blinking on her screen; then she looked back at Donghae, standing awkwardly in the living room with his hands and envelopes behind him, staring at the ceiling. _Probably zoning out_ , she thought, her lips lifting without her notice. _Like the Donghae I love…_

Yoona hit the ‘Back’ button and put the phone back into her pocket.

 

 

* * *

 

Shim Changmin burst into Room 5110, panting for air and looked around anxiously. The young doctor, Siwon, sat on a chair next to the bed of a patient in his fifties. The man in the bed smiled at him, waving a hand to beckon him in while Siwon checked the time on his watch, a smile etched on his face as well.

“I told you he’d arrive in record time if it concerns his sisters. I’m confident to repeat my earlier statement, sir, that Mr. Shim will be very good to your daughter.” Siwon chuckled, tapping his watch deliberately. The older man on the bed laughed, nodding his head and regarded Changmin with an amused expression. He waved him over into the room but he stayed rooted to his spot, perplexed.

 _Oh shit. Don’t tell me that he’s_ —“I am Im Sunghyun, Yoona’s father.” The man said, extending a hand in greeting. Changmin offered him a (anxious) smile in return, stepping forward slowly to extend his hand as well. They shook hands in greeting; Mr. Im’s grip stronger than what one would expect from a hospital patient. Changmin shot a look at Siwon, who shrugged half-heartedly and he inwardly resigned to defeat.

In that moment he felt the fear of being dismissed by a girlfriend’s father… Changmin gripped his whiteboard under the crook of his arm and moved his bag behind him, refraining himself from bolting out the door.

Mr. Im smiled again, raising an eyebrow at him. He felt himself shrink under his gaze. “Well… you must be my daughter’s very tall and very quiet boyfriend.”

Changmin blinked under his jolly (yet intense) stare and nodded anxiously, reaching into his bag for a pen. He shuffled anxiously for it, trying not to sweat – _Oh God, I am not ready for this. I thought I was but I am_ not. _Where the hell are my sisters when I need a distraction?!_ – before finally getting hold of the cylindrical object and started writing. Mr. Im watched him curiously from his position; wrinkling his brow over at Siwon who only nodded and said, “I’m sure Yoona has told you that Changmin is a very quiet man, right? Well… that’s because he doesn’t speak, Sir. Not to anyone actually, not even his sisters.”

“Why in heavens would he not talk?” He asked, blinking at the young man writing on a whiteboard.

Changmin considered his question for a moment, stopping his pen before rubbing out the words he’d already written. He wrote again and then turned the board around, /It’s just something I decided to since I was young, sir. It’s something I’d rather not write about./

/But my name is Shim Changmin, and I am your daughter’s boyfriend./

Mr. Im’s eyebrows rose at the sight of those last words (the strokes of his letters were bold, _certain_. He liked that.) and smirked despite himself. There was a slight chuckle in his voice when he spoke, “Yoona’s always been a little secretive about this part of her life, so you’ll have to forgive me if I’m a little…”

/Surprised? Peeved? Blasé?/

“Well, I see you have a colorful vocabulary. That’s very good.” Mr. Im said, slightly impressed, “Anyway Yoona had told me you were quiet but I didn’t think it was to this extent.”

“It is, obviously. But that’s what makes him so unique.” Siwon said, nodding his head in amusement from the exchange before standing up and grabbing his lab coat. He bowed respectfully towards Mr. Im and patted Changmin lightly on the shoulder before turning towards the door. Then he paused halfway and looked back at them with a smile. “I’m late for my rounds, but if you need anything, Mr. Im, please do not hesitate to call on the nursing staff. I’ll come back to check on you again later… in the meantime, I hope you go easy on Changmin here.”

“As for you…” The young doctor inwardly winced at the death glare Changmin sent his way and he cleared his throat, “Good luck, Changmin.”

/Yeah, I need all the luck./ Changmin waved the board as he left before letting out a resigned sigh. He fished out his phone from his pocket, quickly typing a message ([ _S.O.S. Got tricked by the good doctor. Met your dad a little too soon._ ]) then clicked _Send_. He watched as the envelope disappeared, sending his message across radio waves in the air...

Anxiously, Changmin turned back into the room – back to Mr. Im sitting upright on his bed and smirking at him – and ran a hand through his cut hair. He stepped towards him, taking a seat on the chair laid out beside the patient’s bed and in front of _his girlfriend_ ’s father.

Mr. Im was smiling now and in that instance, he was reminded of his _honey_. Changmin cracked a small smile on his face at the thought.

“Let’s begin the interrogation, eh?”


	7. Chapter 7

Jessica Jung sat down lightly on the bed, careful not to wake its’ occupant from her slumber.

It had been a rough night they told her, once she got home from an urgent meeting with her design team in the U.S. and collectively sighed in sadness.

_“She had become nearly impossible, crying out young master’s name as if he were still alive. The poor madam…”_

She let out a soft, resigned sigh and bit her lip as she brushed back a tendril of hair across her mother’s cheek. She was always near impossible since that day, all those years ago when her father had given her an ultimatum and she went through it with regret. _So much regret._

“Hmm… Choika-Choikang?”

She bit back a cry and wiped at her cheek, pulling on a smiling face as her mother’s eyes came into focus and blinked up at her. “It’s me, Mom… It’s Jessica.”

“Oh… has Choikang come home yet?”

“No, not yet. He’s sleeping over at the Kim family, remember? With Jaejoong-ah and his sisters?” She replied without missing a beat. It was a lie well rehearsed, a lie Jessica told her mother every single day.

“Oh, yes. Yes, I remember.” She buried her head onto her pillow once again, her eyes drifting closed every so slowly. “Will you check up on him for me, Jessica? … you know how your father doesn’t want me to talk to him…”

Jessica nodded once, brushing her cheek once again as the sun’s rays flitted through the spaces in the curtains and she fell asleep again. Another day to waste, and then another night to lie through (again and again and again and again until—maybe, _someday_ …).

“I will.”

 

* * *

 

“So… tell me about yourself.”

The question was simple enough for any adult to start introducing himself to another person once asked… but that wasn’t the case for him. Not for Shim Changmin – because he doesn’t talk. He doesn’t want to talk, even though the situation had him cornered between exposing a deal made with a certain girl and said girl’s father. He tried to think of something appropriate to say under the watchful gaze Mr. Im cast down on him, and secretly wished for an escape when none came to mind.

Changmin knew he wasn’t anything particularly amazing. He juggled three jobs at a daily basis and had two crazy adoptive sisters. The only thing that made him interesting would be the fact that he hasn’t spoken in six years. Not since his adoptive parents left (for another family and the afterlife) him and his sisters to fend for themselves.

What could he say (or rather, write) at this point that wouldn’t sound strange and have him hung by the neck for dating daughter Im?

“Is it a difficult question?” Mr. Im suddenly said, breaking into Changmin’s thoughts and bringing him back to reality. He had on an amused smile and three fingers on his chin. He stared him down and continued, “Are you, perhaps, a dangerous man? Because I don’t see any other reason why it would be hard for you to answer that question.”

The look of utter shock in his face made Mr. Im almost snort in laughter. He hadn’t thought he was dangerous – he was only meant to kid the young man into a more comfortable state. However, it seemed like his little joke only made Changmin even more anxious than he appeared in front of him. Maybe this was why daughters always tell their fathers that they shouldn’t joke in front of their boyfriends. The jokes come off as threatening and put them on edge, when really they were just making pleasant conversation. It reminded him of the day he met his own father-in-law back when he was courting his wife. It had not gone well the first few hours but eventually it got better.

When after another minute all Changmin could do was blink and let his pen hover over the whiteboard, Mr. Im finally let out a loud laugh (one that almost mirrored her daughter’s) and shook his head.

“I was joking, Changmin. I don’t think you’re dangerous. Extremely nervous, yes – but that’s understandable considering.” He said, smiling. He gestured to himself and lifted an eyebrow. “Do I look scary to you? If so, you’ll have to forgive me. It’s the Dad mode, I think. It’s innate in our system to scare our daughters’ boyfriends away.”

Changmin let out a relieved breath, cracking a small smile out of his lips and nodding. He quickly scrawled a message onto the board and turned it over, /You had me there, sir. I was just about ready to burst into another gallon of nervous sweat./

“Don’t worry. I’m not going to do any harm; only asking questions.” He replied, “Just tell me a little bit about yourself. It’s not so hard to answer.”

The young man was motionless for awhile, thoughtful as the pen once again touched the whiteboard in his hands. He shifted into a comfortable position in his seat and began to write moments later, taking extra pains in making sure his language was polite and properly worded. He didn’t get to finish his degree, but he at least had a good sense of grammar and he wanted to show Mr. Im that at least.

/I am an orphan. I think I should I tell you that first, so that it’s easier for you to understand when I also tell you that I never finished University because I had to work and provide for my two adoptive sisters, Sooyoung and Yuri. They are 20 and 18, respectively and are a handful. Sooyoung is in her second year on a business degree at a community college while Yuri will graduate from highschool soon. Our father left us with a music store to manage and with the money we get from that, I also work part time at a café and help out as a foreman at a construction company called DDC Constructions./

Changmin glanced at Mr. Im for any change in expression and patiently waited to gauge his reaction. He remained utterly thoughtful all the while he was reading, and so he wasn’t sure if the older man was thinking less of him or not. When Mr. Im finally finished reading (or rather, when he finally lifted his gaze to meet his), Changmin pulled the board back, erased the words quickly and added more.

He wasn’t sure how this would make him look but— _Oh what the hell. Better to get over it now._

/… You might be wondering how someone like me – who refuses to talk – could land jobs like that, but it’s quite amazing how understanding people could be to someone in need. I haven’t spoken in six years. Somehow I think I already forgot how./

“Six years? Really? You haven’t spoken in that long?” Mr. Im exclaimed, eyes widening in surprise. He hadn’t expected that – six years was an awfully long time for someone to keep quiet. Almost impossible really, if he thought about it. “How could you have done it? Doesn’t your throat hurt?”

Changmin shrugged, clearing his throat absentmindedly to check. /Sometimes it does, but not often. I’m not entirely sure if not speaking is the same as when someone doesn’t move for a long period of time but so far I think my vocal chords are in good condition./

“Why don’t you speak?”

The question was expected somehow, and Changmin never gave away any reaction. He was used to people asking him that question – and although he had never really answered any of them, he didn’t think saying or rather, writing nothing in response would bode well with his interaction with Mr. Im. Not if he wanted to keep this somewhat ‘OK’ impression of him as Yoona’s boyfriend going.

But what could he tell him that would satisfy the older man’s curiosity and not give anything else about his life away? Changmin had always been a private person. No matter how long he’d been with the Choi family, there were still some things in his past that he could not bear to bring into light. Those memories were his own and no one needed to know about them any more than he’d ever let anyone to ask.

 _What happened in the past will stay there forever._ He thought, absentmindedly writing words onto his board that he did not entirely mean. Flipping it over, he watched as Mr. Im’s eyes skimmed the message – /Mr. Im… there are just some things I realized I could live without…/ – nodded once and sighed in understanding.

“You are a very peculiar man.” Mr. Im said, rubbing his chin slowly as his old eyes studied Changmin’s face for any sign of distress or reaction or really anything. He gave away none, which made him both impressed and feel slightly suspicious. “But for whatever reason you have in choosing not to speak, I cannot force you to tell me.”

He watched as he nodded apologetically, bowing his head at him in reverence. He continued speaking, pulling his thin hospital blanket closer to his stomach and shrugging. “In any case, I don’t think speech has much to do about loving someone. Does it? Speaking doesn’t really cause your heart to race when you see her, does it?”

It was fortunate that he had his head down or else Mr. Im would have seen the way Changmin’s eyes widened slightly in surprise at his statement.

No… speech didn’t have much to do about loving someone. Spoken words were ephemeral and could easily be changed – but the emotion, _love_ , was a completely different story. Changmin knew this much at least, although he had never really felt it before—some close enough, but not really. He’s never spoken the words before, and even then he never felt the need to write it either. He had written confessions as child—and as such they were all also childish. ‘I like you a lot.’ ‘Please be my girlfriend.’ – they were puppy love and attraction at best.

He never felt the type of love people always sang about… a love that would send his senses into overdrive at a sudden scent (perhaps one fragrant combination of _lavender and tea_?), or at a sudden thought of (perhaps, _doe-eyes_?) staring into his—

 _Love, huh?_ , Changmin thought distractedly as he raised his head to meet Mr. Im’s gaze. The corner of his lips lifted into a small smile as he thought of the word and its’ concept; followed almost immediately with an image of a woman in a yellow sundress and glasses, sipping an espresso while reading a book and humming. A woman who would look up and say his name with a grin and order another cup before _“going back to class for a test. I’ll see you later. Will you pick me up, Changmin?”_

Perhaps… it was— _is_ love. _Maybe…_ Things had gone on so naturally between them that it was beginning to prove difficult trying to discern which was true (this was just an arrangement between her and Miss Im Yoona; nothing more, nothing less – there are no _feelings_ ) and which was pretend (he _wasn’t_ falling in love with her, he _wasn’t_ falling in love with her, he was…).

“Something tells me you’re thinking about my daughter right now.” Mr. Im’s words cut through his daydreaming like butter on bread and caused him to snap back at attention and laugh nervously.

/Should I be thinking of anyone else?/ Changmin wrote on his board, congratulating  himself inwardly when the older man laughed good-naturedly and shook his head.

“No. You shouldn’t be thinking of anyone else if you’re dating my precious Yoona,” he replied, laughing still.

Somehow his view of this young man was changing – all for the better, of course – though his initial impression was alright. There was something remarkably real about him, honest and direct. He liked that kind of trait in man, especially one who was special to her daughter. In his eyes, Shim Changmin was a strange man but he clearly cared deeply for his little girl to be able to come upfront about his family and his decision to go mute.

Simply knowing that fact… knowing that someone like him – strong, independent and honest – was watching over his daughter with love in his heart made it all the more easy for him to accept their relationship; accept him, he should say, to be his (perhaps) future son-in-law?

He took note of how Changmin readily met all of his gazes all throughout their conversation and smiled in contentment. There wasn’t much he needed to make sure of now that he’d finally met his precious little girl’s man. All he needed to make sure of now is how they were together—

“Say, could you pass me my phone on the table? I need to make a call.”

Changmin nodded and turned around slightly behind him, reaching for the phone with his long arms without much effort and handed it over to him. Mr. Im punched in numbers so quickly that he hadn’t had the time to blink before he was already smiling and talking on the phone with someone.

“No, no – I’m alright. There’s no emergency, dear… I just wanted to call and tell you that I’ve met your boyfriend.”

 _Oh. He called Yoona._ Changmin blinked and waited for him to continue. There was a loud response – something close to a screech of the word “What?!” or something – coming from the receiver when Mr. Im pulled the phone from his ear and grinned at him, to which he returned with a wry grin back. _She must have been busy. She hasn’t read the message I sent her awhile ago._

“Oh come on now – I didn’t torture him! I simply asked questions… no, I did not interrogate him FBI-style, dear. I’m wearing a patient’s gown for goodness’ sake! Do you really think that a man wearing half a dress would intimidate him?” Mr. Im sent him a look of mock resignation and roll of his eyes and Changmin bit back a smile, knowing all to well how chatty Yoona could be when she started to argue. (He had argued over coffee and biscuits once with her at the café – his palm had never been used so much as an eraser before he’d met her peculiar tastes in cinnamon cookies and piping-hot black espresso coffee.)

“Exactly, which is why you should come over… Now? Yes, now would be best. Alright, see you in a little bit.”

The conversation clicked off and Mr. Im pulled his attention back to Changmin who was patiently sitting in front of him. He gave him a little smile and sighed, leaning back against the pillow propped up to his back.

“I hope my daughter isn’t as argumentative to you as she is to me at times. It’s one of her good traits, but sometimes it can get very tiring.”

Changmin shrugged nonchalantly, suddenly feeling comfortable enough in this atmosphere they shared and sat back on his chair, carefully doodling on his board. Actually, he rather liked arguing with her – there was always some new ring to her voice when she spoke about different things, and even more so when she argued her views.

/It gets tiring sometimes, especially when we argue about where to eat dinner./ He wrote, grinning unconsciously as a memory of a random moment they’d shared arguing in front of a food stall – where she would wait patiently for him to write down his response before arguing and pouting at him. He’d never met anyone who was so willing to wait for him to write a response before blabbing on...

It was another one of the (every growing list of) things he liked about Yoona. (And another reason why pretending was beginning to become a problem to him now.

But no, he wasn’t going to think about now. _Not now._ )

Changmin erased the words he’d written before and added,

/But I wouldn’t have her in any other way./

 

* * *

 

Yoona opened the doors to her father’s office with a bated breath. The air was stale around her, the strong scent of books piled up together and dust fleeting around consuming her senses. Her father had been in the hospital for longer than they had originally expected and as a result his office hadn’t been opened for a while now. That is, except for when the cleaning lady came to air out the room every four days.

She stepped into the room and headed towards the desk without much as a look back at the man accompanying her. It was difficult enough to breathe in such a stare aired room, but seeing Donghae again was simply too much for her heart.

“The only documents left here are for the DeViza and Langley accounts. I heard from Uncle Jung that the company would be approving those deals this week so I’m guessing these are the files you need.” Yoona said, pulling out a large attaché envelope and setting it on the table. Donghae nodded absentmindedly, somewhat distracted and she figured it was because of all the books scattered around and the pictures adorned all over the walls.

Her father was a meticulous man for the most part, neat and careful when it came to company and business, but his home office gave away another story. There were family photos scattered all over the walls; some taken with his own family while growing up but most with the family he formed in his adulthood—with him, her, her sister and… Yoona’s eyes softened at the large photograph of his parents gazing lovingly at each other over at the top of the small fireplace.

“Your father really is a family man, isn’t he?” He said, his voice drifting across the room so suddenly it surprised her. Donghae’s eyes were on her all of a sudden that she didn’t think to look away from his gaze when their eyes met. “He’s usually all business at the office… but here… President Im really is a big softie.”

She looked away, nodding her head to appear nonchalant – even though her heart was racing by his proximity and the scent of his cologne. It didn’t help that he still spoke and smiled in the same sweet way he’d always done when they were together; she had to stop herself from reaching out and tucking his collar in the way she used to. This was cruel and unusual torture for Yoona, and she wondered vaguely if she’d done something wrong to deserve it.

“Yes, well…” She tucked her hair behind her ear and turned away, picking up the documents on the table. Yoona held them out for him patiently, trying hard not to look at him for too long because it hurt too much to see him before her and not have things the same way ever again. “This is all you came here for, right? The documents are here… you should go.”

Donghae made no motion to move from his position and instead stared at her from where he was. His lips curled into a soft smile – they looked a little apologetic and sad, but perhaps she was just imagining it. He had no right to be sad for her; after all he’d already ended their relationship and walked away months ago. Yoona definitely did not need his pity… and come to think of it, she didn’t need him to be around any longer in her home either.

She opened her mouth to speak, to gently ask him to leave (before she lost her breath and fall in love with him all over again); only he’d beaten her to it. With another one of those easy grins she loved – _no, damn it_ – used to love so much, he tilted his head slightly to the side and spoke,

“Are you seeing someone new, Yoona?” Donghae grinned at her fully when her eyes slowly widened at his question. “You must be, huh? You had that look on your face earlier when you opened the door – that kind of dreamy lost look you get when you’re thinking of something worthwhile. He must be a good guy.”

“Hyoyeon told you?” Yoona asked, surprised that he’d even think to ask that particular question. She figured someone had told him – and her thoughts immediately drifted to her best friend and confidant.

Hyoyeon had always been the one with a backup plan up her sleeve and Yoona had a fair inkling that telling Eunhyuk was a part of one of her plans. As to why her best friend would do such a thing escaped her, but she trusted Hyoyeon to know what tactic would work and what won’t. Telling Eunhyuk was the first step – there was no way in heck that Hyoyeon would talk directly to Donghae after what had happened between them, but if he knew that she was seeing someone then it only meant she’d told his best friend who’d eventually told him about it. Eunhyuk probably already knew how much Hyoyeon disliked seeing her hurt, but he was also loyal to Donghae too… and well, that was probably Hyoyeon’s point, right? Yoona couldn’t very well expect him to keep her relationship with Changmin a secret to his best friend (especially since they’d already been broken up for weeks now and it was only natural to be seeing someone new at her age, right?).

 _Oh well._ Although technically her association with Changmin was far from romantic, Donghae didn’t know that and there was no need to tell him that bit either. Yoona seriously hoped whatever Hyoyeon had planned would work… even though she couldn’t be sure if she knew exactly what kind of outcome she was hoping for.

 _Gosh._ What would Changmin ~~say~~ write if he knew what she was thinking right now? Would he just stare at her if he were there to witness her exchange with Donghae? Would he have a song for this moment too?

And onto an even more important matter, why was she thinking of even telling Changmin about this? Why would he have to know? For all accounts, this surprise meeting with Lee Donghae will not be spoken of ever again if Yoona could help it. She’d breathe not a word of this to anyone. _Ever._ Not even to Hyoyeon (not unless he tells and Hyoyeon decides to beat her).

“So you are seeing someone? Who is it?” Donghae asked, not really answering her first question and cutting right to the chase. Yoona regarded him with a look and took a deep breath when she saw nothing but curiosity fitting across his features. She was a little disappointed. There was no jealousy in his tone or on the happy-go-lucky expression on his face. (Not that she’d hoped for him to be jealous but it would have been nice.)

Donghae wasn’t that type of guy anyway. He rarely left things with regrets and it seemed that she was no exception. He was clearly over her even before they’d broken up. And thinking just that hurt more than Yoona wanted it to.

“His name is Shim Changmin. I met him a few weeks ago at the hospital while he was visiting his sister,” she replied, her lips lifting into a smile even though her heart felt like ripping itself out of her chest. She hoped her smile wasn’t as phony as she felt it to be. “He’s a little quiet but that’s just one of the things I like about him most.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you found someone you like.” Donghae said, smiling softly. He reached up to scratch his nape absentmindedly and looked at her with a caring expression. Yoona felt her insides curl and flutter, just as it always had whenever Donghae looked at her like that – like she mattered more than anything. He continued with an apologetic smile, “I was afraid you’d have given up on the male species after what I had done to you. I didn’t want that to tarnish your view on loving someone.”

Just how long was he going to torture her with his presence anyway? He’d come for some documents and now he had them – what was he still doing here? She felt her lungs start to constrict and she held a gasp in for air. She had to get out of there…

“Oh, you know… there’s bound to be someone out there for me,” Yoona said nonchalantly, doing her best to stay calm and sweet without giving anything away. “Anyway, are those files all you need? Because I really have to check on my dad before I have to meet Changmin for dinner so…”

That was a pathetic lie, because she didn’t really have to meet Changmin till later – but still, that was the point, right? She couldn’t be standing there with her ex-boyfriend and feeling all sorts of things when at the same time she’d also been thinking about her current (pretend) boyfriend too. It didn’t make sense at all, not in any angle she chose to look at it from. Yoona knew her feelings for Donghae were not likely to disappear in a few months’ time – not when she’d loved him for two years and thought of no one else to spend the rest of her life with – but they were broken up and he was clearly happy with his decision. It was only reasonable for her to do the same and focus on more important things – like her father’s health and graduating.

“Of course. I don’t want to keep you away from your schedule any longer. I have to get back as well anyway,” Donghae said, nodding his head in understanding (he must have caught the lie in her tone but thankfully said nothing) and stepped aside to let her pass through the door before shortly following after her. He shrugged as he edged towards the front door, folding the envelope and folder under his arm nonchalantly. “I’m sorry if I took too much of your time. I guess I had wanted to see how you were too, you know? Since we hadn’t really spoken in a long time…”

Yoona shook her head slowly, smiling as nicely as she could before she felt the need for tears to start falling and embarrassing her fully. “Well, you’ve been away on business and I’ve been busy with my dad and school so…”

“That and we broke up…” He added, finishing the thought she’d wanted to say but didn’t have the heart to speak out loud. She nodded her head at the statement and lamely shrugged, feeling awkward all of the sudden in her shoes. This was one of those moments she wanted to avoid: the awkward talk about the break-up. They weren’t ready yet to venture into that topic, and not that Yoona would ever allow herself to be okay about it anytime soon… but maybe when she truly got over him. _Maybe._

Regardless of the awkward air, Donghae reached over to pat her on the head; she was sure he had meant it to be a reassuring pat but it had lingered a little longer than it should and she pulled away almost immediately once she realized this. “That too,” Yoona agreed, her smile faltering just a bit as he looked back at her apologetically.

Suddenly her phone began to ring and vibrate inside her pocket with a ringtone she instantly recognized was distinctly her father’s. Feeling a sense of relief wash over her, she fished her phone out of her pocket and excused herself from whatever Donghae was just about to say at that moment, Yoona answered the call with a light tone she reserved for her father alone:

“Hi, dad. Is something the matter?”

“No, no – I’m alright. There’s no emergency, dear…” her father said, his voice energized for some reason. He paused for a second and dread crept into her thoughts ever so slightly as she waited before he continued speaking, “I just wanted to call and tell you that I’ve met your boyfriend.”

“What?!”

Yoona suddenly felt like dropping her phone and stomping on it as the words hit her ear. _Met your boyfriend? Changmin? Now? No! He wasn’t supposed to meet Changmin till we talked about it! How did this happen?!_ Her thoughts burst and collided in her head as she fought to stay calm after her momentary outburst. She glanced around her (Donghae had winced at her shriek and was looking at her strangely now – she waved him off) and took a deep breath. “Dad… please do _not_ tell me you’re doing that “Big-FBI-Daddy” thing you’ve always wanted to do and interrogating him in a darkly lit cell…”

“No, I did not interrogate him FBI-style, dear. I’m wearing a patient’s gown for goodness’ sake! Her father laughed through the phone and she instantly felt a wave of relief knowing that open laughter meant nothing bad had happened. Yet. “Do you really think that a man wearing half a dress would intimidate him?”

“Who knows, Dad? You can be pretty scary.” Yoona replied easily, smiling despite herself. “Exactly how long have you been keeping Changmin hostage? I think I might have to save him from you now.”

“I’m not that scary, dear. But if you’re going to come here now then that would be best.”

“Alright, I’ll see you in a bit.” She said, nodding to herself before clicking off the call with a sigh. Donghae let out a short chuckle beside her and she turned to him with an eyebrow raised, suddenly remembering that she was not alone and that he was in her presence. A familiar thump rushed into her chest and she frowned to herself before rolling her eyes and turning away just as her cheeks began to blush furiously. The look he gave her was easy enough to understand – it was a play at trying to look innocent while at the same time teasing the other person to something or someone they don’t ever want to admit to liking. It was a childish look, elementary children made those whenever they yelled ‘cooties’ – but it looked sportingly fresh on him, and it was at that moment that she wished things were back to how it was.

When it was the two of them – Yoona and Donghae, Donghae and Yoona – and they were happy.

 _We were happy, weren’t we?_ Yoona thought vaguely as she picked up her car keys and started towards the door. Donghae followed her silently, still chuckling to himself and unaware of what was going on in her head. _We were in love with each other, right? At least for a while?_

The thoughts were pitiful in her head and she silently scolded herself for being so… She shook her head and sighed softly. There was no point in wondering now – that would only make her feel even more pathetic than she already was. No matter how much she missed him, it couldn’t change that fact that they were over, he had moved on and she… well, Yoona was moving on as best she could. Although not conventionally… but at least she tried.

“I’m going to go visit my Dad now. You got everything you need, right?” Yoona asked again, avoiding to look at him one more time before she truly caved. The sooner he left the better, and maybe then she could breathe normally again.

Donghae simply nodded and turned towards his car parked in front of the driveway. He gave her a half-wave before slipping into the front seat and starting the car. He grinned at her just as he pulled out onto the curb, “When your dad gets back from the hospital, you should throw him a party. I know a lot of the senior partners would want to celebrate his coming back to the company again.”

“I’ll think about it.” Yoona replied as he started to drive away, his hand waving just out of the window and her heart finally settling into a calming beat. And then, he was gone.

A tear rolled down her cheek without meaning to and she wiped it away. She shouldn’t have to think about it anymore.

_We were happy, weren’t we?_

 


	8. Chapter 8

/I don’t know how you managed to get me to do this./

Changmin rubbed his forehead with his fingers and sighed to himself, unwillingly letting Yoona drag him to several boutiques to look at suits for a sudden formal comeback party he was going to have to attend now that they were officially acknowledged by her father. And he tried not to groan when Yoona shook her head at another suit she didn’t like fitted on him before pulling him out of the store with surprising strength the very moment the ill-fitting suit was off and he was wearing his over worn grey shirt once again.

He felt completely out of place in this area – where all the wealthy kids seemed to hang out and get their stuff. Changmin wasn’t much of a shopper to begin with (that was his sisters’ specialty; not his) nor did he put much thought on what he wore and not. This was alien territory, and he (despite his decision to stay mute and brooding) hated feeling of being left out. People like Yoona probably found this place comfortable, but for him – it was torture. And unknowingly, he kept trying to find an exit to the sea of people occupying this maze of a shopping district.

Changmin carried his whiteboard under one arm while the other was linked snugly with hers as they walked down the busy street. He tried to erase the words he’d written to ask her how much longer he had to endure the torture of shopping, however he only ended up pulling Yoona’s arm in the process and smearing black ink on her forearm.

“Changmin!” she exclaimed, pulling her arm away to rub the dirt away. Hitting him lightly on the shoulder, Yoona made a face and glared at him. “I know you’re not enjoying this – but could you at least try? I’m already freaking out as it is with organizing this party.”

Changmin grunted at her and rolled his eyes. /Then why did you offer a party to begin with? A dinner would have been fine!/ He wrote quickly, tapping the board impatiently as she read his reply. He only received another smack on the arm from her before being pulled down into a corner, her eyes bright as she continued to glare at him with a frown on her face. /Do you realize that a party would have to involve both of us trying to fool an entire army of people your father knows that we’re a couple?/

“Yes, I do know that, Changmin, but what was I supposed to do?” she retorted, crossing her arms across her chest in frustration. Yoona bit her lip as she turned her head to side to check if anyone was looking at them. She really didn’t want to cause a scene, but Changmin had been a pain since she’d pulled him out to get a suit for her father’s party and she didn’t need any thing else to screw with her mood today. Not since Donghae’s come back and made his presence in her heart known.

Her heart gave a little jump at the name and she frowned, stepping back once to breathe. She hadn’t told anyone yet about Donghae coming by her house days before and, thankfully, neither did he. Hyoyeon didn’t call her in a mad rage yet, so it was safe to say that Donghae hadn’t spoken to his best friend about their meeting either. It was just as well because she didn’t think she was all that ready to talk about it to anyone either…

 _Especially not to Changmin._ Yoona looked up to him sighing under his breath and pressed her lips together. She didn’t why she hadn’t told him about Donghae yet… even though technically what they had together was just a sham; Yoona found it odd that they’d never really talked about the person who made her proposition him into pretending to be her boyfriend in the first place. _He doesn’t ask… that’s why_ , her mind told her and she knew it was true. Changmin wasn’t interested to know any more than what she’d already told him; he was just paying her back for what she offered for his sister. That was it. They were friends… sure, but… Yoona sighed in her head, _Yeah… there’s_ _nothing more to that._

(She tried not to think about how disappointed she felt just a little bit knowing this.)

Taking a deep breath in an attempt to ease her nerves, Yoona continued in a calmer tone. “My father’s been cooped up in the hospital for weeks and I really want him to have fun when he gets home, okay?”

Changmin let out a sigh, his shoulders sagging in defeat.

Yoona had been acting strangely since she’d come to rescue him from her father days ago. She was civil for the most part, but he’d noticed how she would refuse to meet his eyes – as if she were hiding something from him that he didn’t know. Even today started out strange – with Yoona arriving at his doorstep with her lips pressed into a thin line and speaking in a business-like tone, telling him that the she was planning a party for her father and that it was semi-formal. This meant he had to wear a suit, but he – obviously – did not own one and so she dragged him out without warning to where they were going.

They walked around all day, unsuccessful at each store they stopped at. She snapped at the salespeople too, which was strange – because Changmin have never seen her act that way to anyone. He watched her once in the hospital; during one of her rounds while Sooyoung went up to her final check up and he accompanied his sister. Yoona was calm with all of her unruly patients, and she never raised her voice… so it was very strange, scary even, to see her so snappy at anyone.

He wasn’t entirely sure what the reason was for her to be suddenly so riled up (he wanted to ask but thought against it in the end) but, more or less, he understood her current predicament. It wasn’t easy to juggle school work, her dad’s health and a fake boyfriend all at once – but even he had to admit that things were getting more complicated by the minute. A lie to one person was already hard enough to tell, and to do so to a number of others? At a party? That had _disaster_ written all over it.

He leaned back against the wall and began to write, taking time with his words in order to give Yoona some air. She looked like she needed it – she was sickly pale when she came knocking at his door, and he wasn’t used to seeing her that way.

/I understand that, but this is getting out of hand and _you know it_./ He wrote, catching her eyes seriously. She read for a moment, taking the words in consideration. Yoona looked pensive for a moment, as if she was weighing options in her head.

“It’s not going to get out of hand,” she replied, smiling a little (probably in hopes to ease his worried thoughts). It didn’t work entirely well, but a happier glimmer in her face was enough to make him feel a little less troubled. “It’ll be okay... You’ll wear a suit we pick out today, walk into the party and impress my dad the way you did all by yourself in the hospital. It won’t be a disaster, I promise.”

Yoona then clasped her hands together and pouted, pleading with him telepathically. “So could you please just go with me on this? It’s not so bad picking out something to wear, Changmin. You might actually enjoy it if you’ll let yourself.” She said, looking at him with a smile. She folded her arms in front of her and smirked. “You know… if I didn’t know any better – I’d say that you just didn’t want to shop with me.”

/I don’t want to shop, period./ he wrote, rolling his eyes at her. Yoona scoffed at him and hit him lightly on the arm, shaking her head. The smile on her face was more natural now, Changmin noticed and he felt relieved about that. _Maybe I should just go along with this then more smiles would come my way_ —He blinked, surprised by himself and acting impulsively by pulling Yoona out of their corner and into the light again, walking freely now towards another store she’d pointed at before they stopped midway.

Her hand was warm, and when she instinctively squeezed her fingers around his – Changmin’s heart leapt. He remembered his conversation with Mr. Im, his thoughts about love (and Yoona, for that matter) and grinned to himself, letting her pull him into another store without much of a fight.

Whether or not he would eventually admit to himself that things with his pretend girlfriend were progressing at a rate that he couldn’t quite understand yet, Changmin knew at least one thing was true: _Yes._ He liked her… a little more than he should. He hasn’t had this much interest in a girl in – well, _ever_ as his sisters would say. And for once, Changmin was actually enjoying himself for the first time in six years.

He scrawled on his board quickly, tapping Yoona (who was pointing at a dark blue suit on the rack) on the shoulder with a grin. Her eyebrow rose in mirth as she read his words:

/You owe me lunch./

 

* * *

 

“You’re going to choke if you keep shoveling food to your face.” Yoona observed, shaking her head and popping a fry into her mouth. She watched as Changmin took another big bite out of his monster burger and rolled his eyes at her, grunting with his mouthful. She half-expected him to tell her off without his full cheeks but then remembered that Changmin didn’t like to talk (he hasn’t spoken in years according to his sisters), and she held her laugh in.

She wondered about it a lot; ‘it’ meaning the reason why her pretend boyfriend refused to use his voice in a normal conversation. She wondered about how his voice would sound like… would it be deep like her father’s? Or would it be smooth like Donghae’s? She thought it would be neither – she thought he would have more of a baritone. The type of voice that was pleasant to the ears and would relax her… Changmin looked like the type to have that kind of tone in his voice.

She shook her head at the though and picked at her own burger, munching on morsels at a time. The more she wondered, the more Yoona wanted to hear him speak – and that was a little strange on her part. Especially since… _well, his business isn’t mine to wonder about._

He pushed his whiteboard in front of her, tapping it with his index finger. Changmin didn’t look up from his food at all, but he had felt her staring in silence. /What’s on your mind?/

“Nothing.” Yoona replied easily. “Did you really think the suit we picked was okay? Because we can always take it back if you don’t like it.”

/It’s fine. Dark colors work on me./

She rolled her eyes at his answer and threw a French fry at him. It hit him on the fringe of his hair and Changmin looked up at her with a raised eyebrow. She only grinned simply in response and reached over to pat the specks of salt stuck to his forehead. “I’m just saying… you can write that you like it and all for my sake but if you really—”

Yoona was cut off by the loud shrill of her best friend’s voice from the restaurant door. “Im Yoona! I didn’t know you were shopping today!” Hyoyeon cried, grinning widely as she walked towards them – ignoring the people staring at her in surprise while her boyfriend, Eunhyuk, followed closely behind (laughing and apologizing on his way).

The pair looked at each other with wide eyes and simultaneously lowered their heads as Hyoyeon approached. Yoona hadn’t told her about suit shopping with Changmin particularly because she had an aching feeling that she would want to tag along. And with the amount of teasing remarks her best friend had swung her way over the past weeks since they’d told her of their arrangement, Yoona simply didn’t feel like putting up with anymore of Hyoyeon’s casual innuendos between her and Changmin’s so-called relationship.

“Hey, Hyo. I see you’ve decided to take your monkey out for a walk.” Yoona greeted, smiling at her friend as the blonde slid next to her in the booth. Eunhyuk scoffed at her teasing him and tapped his foot at her. She rolled her eyes and gestured towards the tall, resigned man in front of her, “This is Shim Changmin.”

/Hello./ Changmin wrote on his board, rubbing his temple with his index finger before giving her a look. Yoona kicked him under the table to straighten in his seat and he did so, after a flurry of incomprehensible sounds flushed out of his mouth. Hyoyeon laughed and shook her head at him and pulled her confused (but amused) boyfriend down to sit.

“Broody here is Yoona’s new boyfriend of a something number of days.” She explained, grinning and winking at Changmin’s glare. “I told you about him. He doesn’t talk – like at all – and only communicates with us through that whiteboard.”

“Why in the world would you not want to talk?” Eunhyuk exclaimed, raising an eyebrow at him while Yoona stifled a laugh. Lee Hyukjae (or Eunhyuk, to which he preferred to be called) worked under her father’s company and was the best in the company’s public relations section. He was charming and thoroughly entertaining, able to crack even the iciest of royals in the information and technology business. She had been introduced to him through Donghae and in turn, she had introduced him to Hyoyeon. It was a love-hate relationship the first time her best friend and Eunhyuk had met, but eventually things blossomed into a pure love. It was one of Yoona’s better plans – and at the moment, she felt the same about introducing Eunhyuk to Changmin as well. If anyone was going to get stoic Shim Changmin to talk (or loosen up, rather; the first option was a high and almost impossible reach) – it would be Eunhyuk.

“I mean I personally love the sound of _my_ voice. Who wouldn’t really? I am an excellent speaker,” Eunhyuk was telling him now, nodding here and there and patting him on the shoulder as if they’d been friends for longer than ten seconds. Changmin looked confused by Eunhyuk’s friendly demeanor but was listening all the same, replying with his whiteboard and fast-like-lightning writing.

“It’s nice to see your trips to the top dogs in the US haven’t changed your ego, Hyuk. It’s endearing – almost.” Yoona said, rolling her eyes at him for launching into a monologue of how amazing he was. It wasn’t conceited of him – that was just the way he was: confident in his abilities and had enough proof to show for it. “Please don’t corrupt my boyfriend’s mind. I don’t need him to start looking at himself in the mirror like you do.”

“I am wounded, Yoona.” Eunhyuk replied, putting a hand over his heart in mock pain. Yoona noticed how his hand reached for Hyoyeon’s from across the table and she smiled to herself, happy for her friend. (She remembered that kind of unconscious display of affection. She missed it, even.) “I was just talking with your boy here, you know. And he’s writes pretty fast – I’m kinda surprised.”

“What are you two doing here anyway?” Hyoyeon asked, turning her head towards Yoona. “Picking out a suit for Changmin for your dad’s party?”

Yoona nodded, smiling. “It took us awhile, but we finally found one that was perfect.”

“That’s good. But how about you? Have you got a dress already?” she asked, eyes wide and shining (Yoona wasn’t particularly sure if she liked that shine on her best friend’s eyes).

“I haven’t. I thought I’d just wear something from my closet.”

“Oh God, no. You are not going to wear anything old from your closet, Yoona. We are going to find you the perfect dress to go along with Broody’s perfect suit.” Hyoyeon announced, grinning at her mischievously before turning her attentions to Changmin. The latter met her gaze head on and waited for her to speak, looking as thought he already knew fully well where this was going. Yoona had to stop herself from laughing at how calm Changmin was in handling her best friend’s impromptu bursts of ideas. (She felt a little proud, knowing that he was not as serious as he was brooding.)

“Hey, Broody, what would… well, write if we all go out and pick Yoona’s dress for the party?”

The silent man could tell she was teasing him; pointing the spotlight on him just to see how he would react to the thought of seeing Yoona try on dresses for him the way he had worn suits all day for her. And if he had bitten the bait, Changmin knew that he wouldn’t be able to hear the end of it from Miss Hyoyeon Kim.

But then again – it wasn’t a bad idea either.

/Sure./

Yoona’s eyes widened at his reply (she’d half-expected him to write ‘no’ and say that he was tired). “Are you serious? After all that walking we did today, I didn’t think you’d want to go… shop again.”

Changmin shrugged, downing his water in one gulp before writing again. /I don’t mind. I have time to spare./

“Alright! That is what I call good cooperation, Broody. Go you! You’re actually less of a bore now.” Hyoyeon said, standing up almost immediately in glee. She grabbed Eunhyuk’s hand and grinned happily at the pair rolling their eyes at her as they carefully stood up as well.

“We are going to have fun, people,” she announced, winking at Yoona before linking her free arm to hers. She caught a peek of her friend tugging on Changmin’s hand beside her and said nothing, grinning to herself mysteriously. Pulling her boyfriend and friend towards the exit, she added,

“At least… it’s going to be fun for me and the guys.”

 

* * *

 

“How long are both of you going to be in there?”

Forty-three minutes had already passed since both Hyoyeon and Yoona disappeared into the dressing room with each an armful of dresses in hand. Changmin stared up at the ceiling, mystified almost at the bright lights shining from there while Eunhyuk moaned and whined for his girlfriend to hurry up. A woman’s dress boutique was a mysterious cavern; a place that should not be ventured into by a man for a long period of time (in their case forty minutes was already a century)… and they’d already gone to several boutiques since his meal that day. He was sure that he’d lose his mind if he had to go to another one after this.

(Although, of course, seeing Yoona in a number of beautiful dresses were worth all of the waiting involved in the girls’ ardent dress shopping. Seeing her step out, looking beautiful and wearing a different gown every time made his heart jump for more times than necessary – and he decided he liked this part of shopping. Changmin had even went as far as thinking he’d make it a point to make her go shopping for a new dress any time if she ever thought of throwing a party again.

Of course, he’d thrown the idea down the drain. Tempted as he was, he knew this arrangement of theirs was going to end eventually – sooner or later. And it was best not to get too close than they already were as friends.)

“Kim Hyoyeon, you get out of–”

“Shut up, Hyukjae!”

Changmin swallowed back a burst of laughter from escaping his lips and instead buried his face into his hands, shaking as his mirth overtook him. He’d only met both Hyoyeon and Eunhyuk recently, but even he could tell just how perfect the two were for each other. They were an interesting pair, both full of energy and life.

/You’ve got a feisty woman there, Eunhyuk./ He wrote, raising an eyebrow at the exasperated man beside him.

“Tell me about it. I swear if I didn’t love her so much, I’d—” Eunhyuk made a show of strangling someone in thin air. Changmin could only grin and shake his head.

“You and Yoona look pretty good together,” he said suddenly, leaning back against his chair. “When Hyo told me that Yoona had found someone new already, I was surprised. Yoona isn’t the type to date often, and when she and Donghae—you know about Donghae, right?”

/Ex-boyfriend./ Changmin felt a pinch in his heart but he ignored it. He knew about Donghae, that was the truth. Not every little detail, but he knew of him and that was enough…

_Right?_

Eunhyuk nodded, grinning easily from his seat. “Yeah. He’s my best friend; great guy, really – just a little stupid. Anyway, I thought it was a little fast – her moving on to a new guy and all.” He shrugged, oblivious to the slight apprehension scurrying on Changmin’s face. “But then again, I can’t blame her.”

“She seems to genuinely like you though. I don’t think she would have stayed with you for a something number of days if she didn’t.” Eunhyuk observed, speaking more to himself than to the man beside him.

He knew Yoona for as long as his relationship with Hyoyeon has been on and always thought that she was a level-headed and conservative girl. When she’d been with Donghae, her reserved personality had shone through with every chaste kiss they shared. He knew that Yoona loved his friend dearly, and was the type to love someone for long before slowly moving on. He’d expected her to wait half a year before jumping into another relationship or even longer than that – and so it was a surprise when Hyoyeon suddenly told him about Yoona’s relationship with Changmin. They’d met at the hospital while she was visiting the president (her father) and apparently there was some instant connection. It wasn’t entirely impossible to happen, but… he stole a glance at Changmin drumming his fingers on his whiteboard, waiting patiently for the girls to come out of the dressing room.

 _He’s pretty cool though_ , he thought, intrigued by the idea of someone who chose not to speak and instead spoke through words on a white board. _The fact that he’s able to pique Yoona’s interest for so long can only mean that he’s pretty special to her. That’s better than moping._

“Okay, we’re done!” Hyoyeon said, stepping out of the fitting room with a big grin on her face. She rushed towards her boyfriend and piled herself into his lap, wrapping her arms around him before continuing with a wink towards Changmin. “I made her put on all the dresses first before picking out best one. It’s up to you now, Broody, to say if it’s perfect or not.”

/You do realize that I’m a guy, right?/

“Yeah, so?”

Changmin rolled his eyes at her. /Women’s fashion isn’t my forte./

Hyoyeon laughed loudly. “Of course not! Brooding’s your forte – but kidding aside, just go with your gut. If you think this one is what makes your heart stop, then we’ll go with it. If not, we move on to another store.”

Changmin started to write a retort to Hyoyeon’s mere suggestion of going to another shop when Yoona’s voice suddenly drifted out of the room. “Can I come out now?” she asked, her tone almost anxious for waiting too long. And when Hyoyeon shot him a look, he decided against writing a reply and let things be. She grinned at him and called out for her friend, clasping her hands together in excitement as the curtains slowly drew open—

_Oh… my… God._

He stared wide-eyed, his legs pulling him out of his chair without a command from his brain. He hadn’t even known he was standing until he was right in front of her, entirely entranced by her that he’d dropped his whiteboard on the floor without a care.

“I told you we picked the right one!” Hyoyeon cheered, laughing along with her boyfriend who was leering at Changmin with catcalls and suggestive innuendos.

Changmin didn’t seem to really care about what Eunhyuk was saying, and that was a golden sign for Hyoyeon to grin and shoot her best friend a thumbs up of approval. She had to keep from laughing at the fact that Broody himself was pretending more naturally as a boyfriend than she’d originally put him down for. She remembered her solo conversation with him at the hairdressers and grinned to herself, knowing fully well that the feelings Changmin had denied that day were definitely showing now. And whether or not neither of them had any idea of what was building between them was more than just amicable friendship, Hyoyeon knew it was best not to rush.

 _But_ – she stole a look at the silent eye-exchange Changmin and Yoona were sharing at the moment and grinned – _at the rate they’re going, spending their free time together and learning more about each other… it’s only a matter of who will confess first._ “Yo, Broody! Say something!”

Changmin blinked distractedly, completely unconscious of whatever it was Hyoyeon and Eunhyuk were talking about behind him. He shrugged at them for a moment before turning back to Yoona and at how beautiful she looked.

She smiled at him nervously, wringing her hands about and flattening the front of her attire. It was a fine-looking dress, strapless and emerald green in color that went perfectly well with her fair skin. It ended just below her knees, the skirt of it fitting over her legs in a pencil-like cut. With her long, brown hair loose about her shoulders and Yoona staring at him with those doe eyes and pink lips – Changmin felt like leaning forward and kissing her.

“What do you think?” she asked, blinking at him curiously. His reactions to the past dresses she’d tried on at the other shops were more or less the same: a nod here and there, a wrinkle of the nose when he didn’t like the cut or color, an oblivious rally of blinks… she was almost sure he’d do any of those again, but he didn’t. Instead, Yoona found him staring openly – standing on his feet, completely entranced.

Changmin looked at her like she was most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.

And she didn’t know whether to tell him off or blush furiously.

He felt the air around him for his whiteboard, his eyes never leaving hers for even a second. Noticing this, Yoona didn’t know how to react and she felt a blush coming to her cheeks immediately when Eunhyuk (finally and laughingly) handing him his board and he looked away so he could write a response to her question.

/We’re going to take this one./ He wrote simply, showing the board to Eunhyuk and Hyoyeon for a moment and then back at her. Yoona felt herself smiling as she nodded and her friends stood up knowingly, leaving them almost immediately to ring up their purchase and give them some privacy.

“Finally, you picked one! I was afraid we’d have to go to another place.” She said, turning her back towards him to face the mirror. His reflection was on the glass when she turned to look at herself, looming behind her in an almost protective stance. Yoona smiled at him and blinked at her reflection. “I’m glad you like this though… this was the most comfortable out of all the dresses I put on today.”

Changmin stepped towards her and leaned against the mirror beside her, facing her with a quiet smile. He raised his whiteboard for her with new words already scrawled onto it.

His words surprised her. /You’re beautiful./

“You’re beautiful?” Yoona echoed, taking the board into her hands. She looked up at him, eyes wide. “You’re serious?”

He nodded.

“Oh.” She bit her lip, fighting off a smile coming to her face. She wasn’t sure why she had to fight it off, but somehow Yoona felt like she had to. She handed the board back to him and nodded. “Thank you.”

/You don’t believe me?/

“It’s not that… I just didn’t expect to read it from you.” She replied, shrugging. “You usually just roll your eyes at me when we hang out. You don’t have a lot of facial expressions, you know. That’s why Broody’s your nickname.”

Changmin laughed, shaking his head. He’d always found her beautiful whenever they saw each other. She dropped by the café he worked at before class every day to say hello, and each time he had to stop himself from smiling too much or doing anything stupid. His friends were around and ever since he’d told them about Yoona, neither Minho nor Kyuhyun had stopped giving teasing backhanded comments. She looked and smelled like sunshine, and it was only natural for him to find her attractive during the course of their ‘relationship’.

But then again, he understood what she meant. He wasn’t the type to say these types of things to anyone; not to any girl he’s dated, not even his sisters.

Changmin erased the words on his board and wrote again, /I always think you’re beautiful. I’m just not good at stuff like that./

“Compliments?”

/No. I’d rather show what I think than write anything embarrassing./

Yoona raised her eyebrow at him curiously, turning towards him with her arms folded in front of her. “Really? And what does that mean exactly?”

Changmin regarded her for a moment. _Do you really want to know?_ He asked her telepathically, his eyes staring into her eyes before dropping his gaze onto her lips. It would be a lie if he told himself that he hadn’t thought of kissing her for a while now… but – _You’re not really together, Shim. You won’t even admit to anyone that you like her yet._

“Changmin…” her voice trailed off as he leaned towards her. His face was so close to hers, their lips inches away from meeting… her heart began pounding in her ears, and she wondered for a brief second why she wasn’t pulling away at all. The warmth of his breath touched her cheeks and she shivered, gulping a little bit as he inched closer and closer—

“So I charged it to Eunhyuk’s card and—woah!” Hyoyeon suddenly burst into the room, shocking them out of their trance and they jumped apart. Her eyes were wide in surprise while a small broke out of her face. _Still denying those feelings, Broody? Yeah, right!_

“I guess I ruined a romantic moment, huh?” she said, laughing as the couple straightened themselves and apart. “Your arrangement’s really authentic these days.”

“Hyoyeon, stop.” Yoona shushed, blushing furiously. She threw a cautious glance at Changmin and gulped visibly when she found his eyes trained at her once again. There was something different in those dark eyes now… something – _oh._ Her heart trembled in her chest and she turned without another word, disappearing into the fitting room to change.

Changmin exhaled loudly, slumping back against the mirror. In front of him, Hyoyeon only laughed – “Hey, Broody. Remember what I told you, okay?”

/What?/ He wrote, rubbing his fingers across his temple. _This is getting out of hand. I’m not supposed to like her for real._

Hyoyeon shrugged, grinning at him as she skipped off towards the fitting room curtain. She covered one side of her mouth with her hand and whispered:

“ _Say it,_ don’t write it.”

And when she disappeared to help Yoona change, Changmin decided didn’t feel like defending himself anymore.


	9. Chapter 9

The day of the party had arrived faster than Yoona wanted it to come. Standing in the middle of her spacious living room, she looked around her and at the people scurrying about – putting flowers in vases and arranging the furniture with the utmost care. If she ventured into the kitchen, she knew that she would find the same scene: a group of people preparing food for the festivity to take place in just a few hours, smiling and greeting easily at her while she passed them.

Her house had come to life at the news of her father’s homecoming, and for a moment, Yoona wasn’t too sure if she was feeling happy by this or not. The help clearly was overjoyed by this, as they’d missed their master as much as she, but her worries were more to the fact that she was afraid of what might happen later. Her father’s friends and business associates would be arriving soon, and so would some of hers and…

 _Changmin’s right. This has disaster written all over it._ Yoona thought, taking a deep breath as she closed her bedroom door behind her. Inviting her father’s business associates also meant inviting his board members – which, coincidentally enough, included Donghae as well. And if she’d felt a little worried about having to explain to people why her ‘boyfriend’ didn’t want to talk, Yoona now also had to agonize over facing her ex-boyfriend at the same event. She knew it would have happened sooner or later, but she hoped it would be later than sooner all the same.

“Please… please let this day end well,” she prayed, closing her eyes with worry. _Please give me the will to smile and laugh and be happy for my father. Give me the strength to face Donghae while pretending to be someone’s girlfriend._ For a moment, Changmin’s face appeared in her mind – wearing that unreadable expression as his lips inched closer to hers. Yoona felt her cheeks burn at the memory and she shook her head, breathing deeply to calm herself.

The memory of that moment still confused her. They didn’t talk about it after they’d left the shop, and when they had to go their separate ways home – Changmin hadn’t done anything to explain himself. Instead, he’d just looked at her the way he’d looked at her in the boutique: focused and admiring… his eyes trained only on her. Yoona bit her lip. She had questions bubbling in her head that night that for some reason she couldn’t ask, and she wondered why. It was clear what their relationship was to the one another – “a business agreement”, to put it callously – and so things shouldn’t have to be so confusing. There shouldn’t have been any problems between them.

 _But why would he look at me like that? And why didn’t I pull away?_ Yoona asked herself, sitting on the bed. She bit the inside of her cheek as she rubbed the soft fabric of her comforter. It was quilt – small and new – something she’d gotten as a gift from Changmin’s sisters whilst they were all out shopping one day.

It was one of those random days (before she’s started planning the party) when Yoona had gone to get a coffee for herself and ended up getting dragged out on a play date with the adopted sisters. Yuri and Sooyoung were too energetic and happy to say ‘no’ to, and even she had to admit that spending the day with them had given her a lot to smile about. They’d stopped at quilt store on the way back and the sisters’ piled in with her in tow. They picked out the comforter from the window and then told her that the contrast of dark and bright patches made them think of her brother and her. It seemed to represent them in a way, they told her. Clashing but perfect together or something like that.

She remembered the way Changmin had rolled his eyes at his sisters’ anecdotes and then smiled at her, showing her his board with words that said not to listen to their cheesy thoughts on them. She also remembered the how well her hand fit in his as they walked together, back to her car with his sisters following behind and teasing them. They bickered and laughed and acted so naturally together that day… It was almost as if they were keeping up appearances as a couple even though it wasn’t really necessary.

Yoona pursed her lips and sighed. “This is giving me a headache,” she whispered, standing up to get her clothes ready for later. Laying out the green dress they’d picked out before her, Yoona felt a small twinge in her heart.

 _Donghae_ had always liked the color green. And _Changmin_ had told her with his eyes how much he liked this dress on her. _Oh dear._

Shaking her head, she let out a loud sigh of frustration and closed her eyes.

“Tonight’s going to be a disaster.”

 

* * *

 

Changmin stood anxiously on the other side of the street where Yoona’s house stood and let out a sigh. He had known Yoona was well-off, but he hadn’t expected it to be to this extent. A number of cars had already passed him and entered the gates of the Im mansion that it made him a little less comfortable in his skin. He was already uncomfortable in his suit – and now, even more at the sight of the royalty entering his pseudo-girlfriend’s home.

 _This has disaster written all over it._ Changmin thought, bravely taking his steps towards the house. A few feet away, he saw Hyoyeon’s familiar figure standing beside Eunhyuk – grinning at him and waving by the door. He loosened his tie just a bit, taking a deep breath as he walked awkwardly towards them. _It’s show time,_ he told himself. _It’s time to play my part._

“Hey, Broody! Looking good!” Hyoyeon greeted, eyeing him from head to foot. She reached over to pat down his anxious shoulders and smirked. “It’s nice to see you out of jeans, I have to say. It’s a nice change.”

“You look almost as good as I do.” Eunhyuk said, giving him a ‘thumbs up’ sign. Then he stepped back and reached behind him (a bag was there, sitting out beside the door), pulling out an iPad and stylus before turning back to hand it to Changmin. “Here. Use this instead of your whiteboard. If you’re going to write your conversations, you might as well do it in style.”

Changmin nodded in gratitude and held up the device to his face for a brief moment. He knew how to use it, but the object felt odd in his hands. He’d been too used to writing on his whiteboard since he was 15 that it was awkward to hold up something from the 21st century. Nevertheless, he didn’t want to embarrass Yoona by showing up at a party with smeared ink stains on his sleeves from his whiteboard conversations. It was better to keep up with the times, at least for tonight.

“Shall we go?” Hyoyeon asked, tilting her head to the side and grinning. With her arm looped around her boyfriend’s, she patted Changmin on the shoulder as they readied themselves and faced the doors of the Im household. “Don’t worry, Broodster. We’ll watch out for ya.”

The doors opened slowly, revealing large marble tiles that tinged a faint sense of familiarity in Changmin’s head. He stepped into the house anxiously, his eyes darting from side to side as he drank in the image of this unfamiliar home. Whatever confusion he might have had over how much exactly Yoona’s quiet wealth was when she offered to help him pay his sister’s hospital bills left him the second he stepped into her home.

 _She wasn’t kidding when she said she could afford it_ , he thought, whistling softly to himself and admiring the posh interior of his (pretend) girlfriend’s home.

“Hey! Changmin!”

Hyoyeon and Eunhyuk had already gone ahead of him a few steps while he surveyed his surroundings and were now calling him to follow. Changmin did so cautiously, gulping down the nervousness he felt once he was surrounded by the sophisticated murmurs of important but unfamiliar faces. The couple accompanied him diligently, murmuring information and encouragement while they passed several people. They must have known he was nervous as hell with the way they took him around the room, but he felt grateful nonetheless. It was good to be around people he knew somewhat at least rather than face things alone. He hadn’t even spotted Yoona yet, and so being coached by the HyoHyuk couple (he dubbed them as such in his head, since it was easier to remember) was better than standing like a statue.

“Don’t worry about a thing, bro.” Eunhyuk spoke, patting him on the shoulder and grinning. Changmin cringed to himself, wondering when they’d suddenly become ‘bros’ but listened nonetheless as the lanky man continued, “I don’t know half of the people here either but if they’re invited by the Im family then it just means that they’re good people and that they’re non-threatening.”

Hyoyeon agreed, nodding her head slowly. “Eunhyuk’s right. The people who surround the Im family are probably the nicest folk you’ll ever encounter. You’ve met Mr. Im – he’s so fluffy! Like a bear!”

/Scary as hell too./ Changmin added, feeling strange at the fact that he didn’t get inkblots on his fingertips. He thought about it for a second and added a second line, making the pair laugh and shake their heads at him, /Like a bear./

“You’re unusual, you know that?” Eunhyuk said, chuckling. Crossing his arms across his chest when they stopped by the open bar, he nodded his head approvingly at him. He was beginning to really like the fact that his best friend’s ex-girlfriend was now moving on with an interesting guy like him.

 _Sorry, Donghae but I’m on Changmin’s team now._ He thought, shrugging to himself. Putting an arm around his girlfriend’s shoulders, he grinned and lifted a drink to his lips. “It’s no wonder Yoona likes you. You’re cool, like me.”

Hyoyeon’s smile was identical to her boyfriend’s when she pushed Changmin’s shoulder with her free hand. She pointed past him, her eyes twinkling mischievously. “And speaking of Yoona…”

Changmin turned his head, his eyes widening slowly as Yoona entered the room with her hair flowing down her back and in the dress he’d picked just the other day. She hadn’t spotted them yet from her place at the door, and he was fine with that since it gave him time to peruse and save the angelic image she made at that moment.

He’d seen her often in and out of the hospital looking the same as she did when they’d first met – plain and lovely in her own quiet way – but tonight was beyond different. Tonight was… simply magical. Like a dream.

“Hello.” Yoona greeted, smiling with her hair sweeping down her back and shining. She stopped in front of them with her hands placed demurely in front of her, her skin glowing.

Changmin’s lips widened into a smile and vaguely felt himself open his mouth to—to _what?_ He caught himself just in time as his breath came in a rush and closed his mouth. No sound came out and Yoona didn’t notice but it surprised him.

 _Did I almost speak just now?_ Changmin reeled, confused and blinking in disbelief.

Maybe it was the silky shine of her hair, or the way the loose locks fell past her shoulders. Maybe it was the way her skin seemed to glow against the fabric of her dress; shining at each slight movement she made, turning her head to one side and another as she greeted her friends. Or maybe it was the glow in her eyes when she’d finally looked back at him with a raised eyebrow or how time seemed to stop for him at that very second as she asked him what was wrong, her pink lips enticing him to inch closer and capture them in his…

Whatever it was, it didn’t hold much explanation at the surprise he felt in himself. Changmin didn’t even realize the breath he held in until she finally tapped his shoulder and he looked back at her eyes shining concern.

 _I almost spoke_ , his mind processed as he put a smile on his face and shook his head to ease her worries. His heart pounded in his chest at the realization as he wrote down a greeting and showed it to her.

/Hello, Yoona./ _I almost spoke._ /You look beautiful./

 

* * *

 

Yoona felt slightly uncomfortable in her skin, all dolled up and wearing a beautiful dress and a pair of heels. She wasn’t so used to them, but Hyoyeon had insisted she wear a pair ( _“The dress won’t work with flats, Yoong! Come on now and be a girly-girl to the party at least!”_ ) and for once (although she would never admit to her friend) she was happy to have thought to oblige. She couldn’t deny that her outfit did look better with heels on, but it also helped her to see her ‘boyfriend’ at a whole new level.

Changmin was too tall and although she liked his height, it got tiring sometimes to always tiptoe just to gauge his reaction. To be able to see his eyes for once and catch the flurry of expression reflected in them was nice.

 _Really_ nice, in fact.

She caught herself staring back and admiring her newfound view. _‘His eyes are actually a really dark brown. Like dark chocolate…_ ’

Shim Changmin had kind eyes. Kind eyes that were staring straight at her and making her blush pink in part-embarrassment and part-appreciation. It felt good to dress up sometimes and even better when someone was around to look at you as if you were the best image around. It made one feel special, _wanted_.

(If Yoona only thought about it for a second, then perhaps she would have realized that she hadn’t felt wanted in a long while… not even when she was still with Donghae and blissfully in love.)

“You look handsome tonight, Changmin,” she said, quirking her eyebrow upward in amusement as she took in his appearance for the night. The dark grey suit she’d picked out for him looked surprisingly natural on him, as if he was born to wear them on an everyday basis and complementing the tan of his skin. He looked so put together and business-like; it felt sort of surreal looking at him with his hair brushed back just so and neat. He was the picture of the perfect boyfriend.

Well, almost perfect – his tie was a little crooked, but that only made him look endearing instead.

Yoona, unaware of the whispers erupting around her, reached over to fix his tie. “It’s a little weird seeing you so put together,” she said, crinkling her nose at him. “But it looks really good.” She flattened the piece of fabric gently, smiling when he shrugged nonchalantly – as if he knew that she thought he looked better than how she said it.

“He cleans up nice, ne?” Hyoyeon said, wiggling her eyebrows in between them and effectively pulling her best friend and her ‘boyfriend’ out of their moment.

“Yeah, he looks almost as good as me,” Eunhyuk agreed, nodding his head and earning a collective laugh from both Yoona and Changmin. (Except Changmin made no real comprehensible sound but opted for a very amused expression instead; one that was distinctly him: a widening smirk and mismatch eyes to boot.) Hyoyeon rolled her eyes at her boyfriend, clicking her tongue while Changmin wrote something (a sarcastic reply) on the iPad and roused another round of laughter in their little group.

She stood back and watched as Yoona lightly hit her (pretend) boyfriend on the arm, her brow knitting together while she laughed and leaned into him; completely unaware of how Changmin’s hand slipped onto her waist so naturally, Hyoyeon almost missed it. A smile grew wide on her face and she laughed to herself. It amused her to no end knowing the fact that they’d been acting more and more natural each time she saw them together…

Honestly – if she didn’t already know better, Hyoyeon would have thought it was a hundred percent real. They played their parts so well it was hard to distinguish the fact from the fiction they’d created! It seemed to her that Yoona really had moved on and fell in love with a scruffy and brooding guy. Changmin was the opposite of the energetic and business-minded, Lee Donghae, she’d last seen holding her best friend’s heart… and for a reason unbeknownst her, Hyoyeon thought she preferred the latter ‘boyfriend’ than the former.

“Changmin! There you are!” Mr. Im’s voice suddenly boomed, surprising the group from their chatter to turn towards the elderly man. Yoona’s eyes widened slightly at the sudden entrance of her father, beaming and rolling his wheelchair on his own towards them to shake Changmin’s hand in greeting.

/It’s nice to see you again, sir./ Changmin wrote quickly, bowing as he held up the iPad and prepared himself for what was to come.

Mr. Im had been courteous enough with him the first time they’d met, their conversation turning friendly ( _Their talking about his relationship with Yoona was friendly, wasn’t it?_ ) as time ticked on and until he left the hospital upon Yoona’s rescue. This would be the second time he would meet him personally since then, and he wasn’t particularly excited of what could happen. Especially with the critical eyes trained at him now that Mr. Im had wheeled himself in front of him and how he’d just conversed with him with an iPad of all things.

Changmin smiled as naturally as he could when he straightened, changing the words on the iPad’s screen with lightning reflexes he didn’t know he could possess while holding something he’d only just received that day. /You look very well. I hope my presence isn’t intruding into your welcome back party tonight./

“You’re not intruding at all, Changmin.” Mr. Im replied with a smile, waving his hand in amusement. He shot his daughter with a smile as well and a loving pat on the arm as he continued, “I was hoping you’d come actually. I wanted to talk to you more before Yoona dragged you away from our conversation in the hospital.”

“I was saving him from you, Dad,” Yoona said, rolling her eyes. She felt relieved that her father seemed to like Changmin better than she’d expected. “You always said you wanted to experience interrogating your daughter’s boyfriend FBI-style and it’s just my luck that you had to do it without warning me or him beforehand.”

“It also doesn’t help that Broody here doesn’t speak.” Hyoyeon added suddenly. Yoona shushed at her with a glare, while Changmin choked a cough and her father laughed heartily. “He wouldn’t have been able to call 911. Text them probably but I don’t think they take those.”

“I actually think that’s what makes him interesting.” Mr. Im said, nodding. Changmin felt his anxiety slip away at every word of praise the elder man said. “And he answered very well even without prior notice, Yoona. It was impressive. You got yourself a very quiet but smart and articulate man. I couldn’t be more proud.”

/Hear that? He said I was impressive./ Changmin wrote, smirking at Yoona as she read. She rolled her eyes at him and grinned at his cheekiness.

“I do have good taste, so of course you’re impressive, _darling_!” The endearment fell flat in her tone and she mentally knocked herself in the head for feeling anxious. Yoona flashed a smile to her friends and father, and continued coolly with a slight shrug of her shoulder, “I wouldn’t settle for anything less, you know.”

The tall man beside her took a step back, putting on a dramatic show of being stabbed by an invisible knife in the heart. /I’m hurt, _honey_./ He wrote, catching her eye and smiling. Yoona kept from blushing and laughing out loud at the little (awkward) heart he drew after the sentence and read on. /Why do you torture me so?/

The people around them laughed at their antics, missing the mutual relieved gaze the couple exchanged.

“You two are so cute, I can’t even,” Hyoyeon exclaimed, clasping her hands together in glee. She wiggled her eyebrows at them, teasing them with the looks she gave them as Eunhyuk and Yoona’s father agreed with her statement. “I swear, if this works out well – I am so going to plan your wedding, okay?”

“Oh, that’s far down the road, right sweetie?” Mr. Im said, pulling on Yoona’s arm protectively while he grinned. He folded his fingers over hers and kissed it lovingly, gazing up at his daughter. The way he looked at her made Yoona feel as though she was a child; 8 years old and running up to him with a crayon-drawn drawing of horses and rainbows. “You’re still in school and you’re still my little girl. Wait a few years, or a century even.”

Yoona felt a warm hand push her slightly on the back, softly coaxing her to hug her father as beads of tears filled her eyes. She turned her head slightly to see Changmin staring at her tenderly, as if telling her to go on and have a moment with her family.

 _‘It’s okay. Don’t mind us. Just go hug your father.’_ His eyes seemed to say, and she found it strange and sweet at the same time to realize that soft and caring look came from someone who’d introduced himself as an orphan to her that night in the hospital.

“Aww, don’t worry, Dad.” Yoona said finally, lowering herself and hugging his withering body to her. She kissed him softly on the cheek and patted his hands, smiling widely when her father looked at her (and Changmin for a split second) approvingly. “I’ll always be your little girl.”

“That’s good to hear. But if you do marry…” Mr. Im raised an eyebrow, focusing his eyes towards the man behind her and smiling. He waved a hand at him and Changmin blinked in response, turning his head slightly to look at Hyoyeon or Eunhyuk for help (only to get a shrug in response).

“Changmin,” he started, folding his arms across his chest. The way he looked at Changmin made him nervous and a little annoyed for being put in the spotlight again. “You would marry my Yoona, right?”

“Dad!” Yoona’s jaw dropped and she hit her father’s arm lightly. She looked back at the quiet man with an apologetic grimace and pursed her lips, blinking at him as he trained his eyes into hers. A blush crept to her cheeks when she realized the look he gave her was the same as that day in the boutique and they were picking out her dress. She fisted her hands on her dress and smiled (ignoring the amused looks her friends threw her), trying to appear calm and collected even though her heart began to thump irregularly in her chest.

“Changmin, you don’t have to ans—”

/I would marry her in a heartbeat./ The words in the screen glowed once he presented the iPad to Mr. Im, large and white and clear against the black background. There was a hush in their little group as they processed what he wrote (Yoona’s eyes widened and her blush deepened, her mouth dropping in shock once again while the others simply stared).

The HyoHyuk stared at him for a whole minute, confusion, disbelief and amusement etched on their faces as they studied the quiet man in his spot. Changmin merely blinked in response, shrugging his shoulder nonchalantly.

/What?/

Hyoyeon made a grab for Yoona’s arm and pulled her towards her, ‘whispering’ (if you call using a hand over a mouth while talking as ‘whispering’), “Yoong, was that a proposal just now?”

On the other hand, Eunhyuk was focused on him, slapping his shoulder a little harder than Changmin anticipated from the lanky built man beside him. “Are you serious, dude?”

/I’m just answering Mr. Im’s question honestly. What’s wrong with it?/ He replied easily, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing. Just that _that_ is a very bold statement to write,” Mr. Im remarked, smiling widely as he leaned back and looked at the young man before him. He took note of Changmin’s stance and perused the way he put himself together for that night. It was a good change, admirable even as it was better than when he’d last seen him, wearing a ratty jacket, shirt and jeans. If he had imagined anyone marrying his daughter it would look like someone who was before him right at that moment, standing confidently and looking at him straight in the eyes when they conversed.

Mr. Im didn’t kid himself into thinking that he would get any better than he already was at the moment because his sickness was lethal and he’d already accepted his fate. He had already started making arrangements for his daughters when he first found out, but there was still one issue he wasn’t sure how to fix. One daughter was already happily married, but his youngest was as stubborn and goal-oriented as his wife was, and Mr. Im knew it would be difficult for him to leave her alone in the world.

He didn’t need an heir to his company because he didn’t want one, but he did want someone he could trust with his Yoona. She needed someone who could take care of her, someone who would cherish amongst all others. And from what he’d first assumed of Shim Changmin – he seemed to be someone who could do just that. Someone he could trust with the only reminder of his love in the whole world.

“I can’t condone an elopement though, I’ll have you know.” The old man joked, narrowing his eyes with a smile. Changmin nodded his head in understanding as he continued, “My daughter is my Princess and she should be treated as such.”

/Well, I don’t think an elopement would fit her Highness’s preferences anyway./ He wrote back, shrugging when Yoona scoffed at him in surprise and hit him with a swift slap of her hand. Changmin’s lips widened into a smile as put his hands up in defense as she started pelting him with light slaps.

“I cannot believe you just wrote that, you—” Yoona said in between hits while her father and friends laughed once again. Her cheeks were still red from embarrassment but it wasn’t bad at all even though it was at her expense.

 _Thank you for trying though_ , she thought nonetheless, lowering her eyes. Lacing her fingers in between his free hand, she squeezed softly and ignored the slight twitch he made in surprise. She knew he was only doing what she had asked him to do: he was being _her boyfriend_ – playful, sweet, caring and good with her father. Changmin was doing his part and Yoona was – in all accounts – very grateful for it.

She was grateful for him for a lot more than she could even say (or realize).

Her hand felt extraordinarily soft in his, fitting perfectly between his fingers as if they were made to be entwined in between them. The soft squeeze she gave his fingers felt comforting ( _so comforting_ ), as if she were giving him ‘thanks’ for something he wasn’t sure he’d done right. Nevertheless, his heart surged at the contact; a smile unconsciously edging onto their lips as he squeezed (‘ _Hey, don’t mention it. You helped me and my sister. It’s the least I can do…_ ’) her fingers right back.

Whatever it was he’d done right, Changmin hoped he could do it again and again and again until—

“Oh, _Donghae_ ’s finally here!”


	10. Chapter 10

It took a little longer than she’d like to come out of her trance, blinking profusely as Lee Donghae slowly made his way through the crowded room towards her. His arm was linked with a woman’s arm – _the girl he replaced me with_ , Yoona thought nauseously and turned her head as the recognition of the Jessica’s (her new friend) beautiful face registered in her thoughts.

She bit back tears in threatening to come to her eyes, focusing her attentions towards someone else instead – Changmin to be exact – and forcing a smile on her lips as he looked back at her in confusion. Yoona watched as his eyes flickered from her to where her eyes had strayed last before coming back to meet her eyes in understanding. She figured he must have pieced all together by the look on his face, but if he didn’t then Eunhyuk’s loud greeting would have clued him in.

Inwardly she winced at the sudden call her friend made but made no move to reprimand him or even turn around. She didn’t want to. Not when her heart was shattering inside her chest all over again.

Changmin’s fingers reached out to touch hers, silently breaking into her thoughts as she looked up in surprise and he moved closer to stand by her side. Yoona held on his fingers tight and willed herself to be stronger than how she truly felt. There was no turning back now.

“Oh, hello, Yoona,” Donghae greeted the very second he and Jessica reached them. He looked at ease with his bright smile, his arm softly placed around Jessica’s waist as though it was the most natural thing in the world. Yoona noticed how happy he looked to be with her in his arms. _Better than when we were together_ , she thought bitterly before she could stop herself.

She tried not to grimace as Donghae gestured towards Jessica and introduced her to the group. Her only reassurance came from Changmin’s hands folding hers in between his, anchoring her to be strong which she appreciated more than anything.

“I’d like you all to meet my girlfriend, Jung Sooyeon.” Donghae started, unperturbed by Yoona’s ( _masked?_ ) uneasiness. He was smiling wide as the lady in his arms blushed prettily beside him and smiled as well. “She’s a fashion designer based in New York and likes to go by her English name, Jessica.”

Jessica nodded her head and greeted each of them warmly, her eyes straying just a little bit longer at Yoona (and Changmin). She was mildly surprised to be in Yoona’s presence again after only meeting her days before, but she didn’t mind so at the same time. She liked Yoona after all, and even more now that she looked at the tall man standing beside her protectively again. A flicker of recognition crossed his features when their eyes met, but –like what her sources informed her – he remained silent all through out the introductions.

She wasn’t surprised of Changmin’s cold shoulder treatment. After all, she was one of those who had driven him away in the first place.

But that was a story for another time. For now, all that Jessica was interested in was who her new friend, Yoona, was to Shim Changmin?

On the other hand, Changmin simply ignored the familiarity he’d seen in Jessica’s face. He knew who she resembled in his mind and he knew her voice even after all this time but he didn’t dare let himself dwell on pursuing the thought any further. He was at a party for a reason, for a business agreement – _for Yoona_.

That was the only reason he cared for.

“It’s really nice to see you again, Yoona. I didn’t expect to see you again so soon, but I’m glad nonetheless!” She said, smiling wide and stepping forwards. Jessica clasped her hands together and bowed her head slightly, “I want to thank you for recommending that café near the hospital. My mother really liked the caramel macchiato from there, and she isn’t the type to drink anything with milk or caffeine at all. It helped a bit, I think, to ease our transition back to the country.”

“Oh, it’s no problem, really,” Yoona replied, shaking her head. It was hard not to smile back when greeted so warmly, even if a big part of her did feel like tearing her hair out and screaming. “I’m only glad I was able to help in such a small way.”

“I didn’t know you two have already met.” Donghae interrupted sheepishly. He ran a hand through his hair and wrinkled his nose cutely at Jessica while he spoke. He put an arm around the blonde beauty and continued, “Am I missing anything else since I got back from business in New York?”

The couple smiled at each other warmly, gazing into each other’s eyes that it seemed like they noticed nothing else around them. Hyoyeon and Eunhyuk exchanged glances at this before training their eyes towards Yoona’s frozen smile. They pitied their friend but in this situation, both of them knew it was best not to interfere.

 _Besides_ , Hyoyeon thought, watching her best friend smile and make small talk from the side. _She can take care of herself. She doesn’t need me to butt in when she can handle things on her own._

“Oh, I almost forgot!” Yoona exclaimed when she caught sight of Changmin grinning beside her and realized that she’d forgotten all about him. Punching him lightly shoulder while he continued to grin, she linked her arm around his and pulled him closer. She motioned him towards Donghae and Jessica and introduced him as comfortably as she could.

“This is Shim Changmin… my boyfriend,” she started as her hand gripped his forearm close. “Changmin, this is Donghae – one of my father’s associates and Eunhyuk’s friend. And this is Jessica, Donghae’s girlfriend.”

Changmin tried not to wince at how hard she was clutching his arm and nodded in greeting. He went as far as putting a hand over her trembling one in an attempt to calm her, which worked – _more or less_ – as she relaxed under his touch.

/Hello. It’s nice to meet you./ He typed with Yoona’s help, bowing his head again politely. The couple blinked at him at first before turning their attention to the iPad’s screen, clearly confused at his mode of communication.

“He – how should I say this – Changmin doesn’t really talk. He writes instead.” Yoona explained; smiling wide despite herself as Donghae’s brow knotted across his forehead. It was too cute and she couldn’t help but feel a little relieved at how the sinking feeling in her chest faded.

It was sudden, but Yoona wasn’t surprised at all.  She’d always known that she couldn’t keep feeling any ill emotions for Donghae, no matter how much she wanted to. Even though he broke her heart with no real explanation and had another woman in his arms, she could never be angry with him. It was just impossible. Yoona loved him too much to feel beaten or betrayed.

“That’s peculiar… but if you like that about him, then I guess it’s okay.” Donghae replied, grinning. He held out his hand and shook Changmin’s hand, “It’s nice to meet you too, Changmin. Make sure to take care of her, alright? He’s my boss’ daughter after all.”

/Don’t worry. She’s in good hands./ Changmin reassured, smiling good naturedly. _Yoona’s ex doesn’t seem like he’s some stupid person_ , he thought. Rather it seemed to him like Donghae every bit an intelligent and capable man. There was hardly anything threatening about him really, and like Eunhyuk said – he was a good guy in all accounts.

 _Maybe their relationship just ran its’ course,_ He figured, glancing back at Yoona laughing at something Donghae had mentioned about his recent trip. His lips lifted at the brightness of her smile and felt strangely relieved that the anxiety across her features had finally disappeared. His sisters’ had told him once that a smile could make anyone shine, but thinking about it now – there was nothing brighter than a smile on Yoona’s lips.

 _Her lips_. His eyes lowered to the soft folds of skin before he could stop himself, glossed and pink while she laughed unaware of his stare. To be honest, Changmin hasn’t stopped thinking about her lips since that day she’d dragged him around to buy his suit. Maybe it was just that he was uncomfortable of wearing something tailor-made or that he hasn’t kissed a girl in awhile since the last date Kyuhyun had shoved to his face but there was something about those to slips of flesh that intrigued him to no end.

They were rosy pair, symmetrical with only the lower lip slightly fuller than the other. They were moist with gloss or whatever it was that she put on and called to him whenever she spoke or said none at all. If he were being honest to himself, he would have wanted to pull her away just so he could touch those lips and feel them under his fingers. Maybe he’d even permit himself to pull those twin slips of flesh with his…

That is if the situation were _different_.

If only they weren’t playing pretend and exchanging services (monetary for her, physical for him) over to their own favors.

/I think I’ll get something to drink. Would you like something, Yoona?/ Changmin wrote, steering his eyes to anywhere but her lips.

Yoona looked at him in surprise when he pulled at her elbow and slowly nodded when she read his words, turning to him just so to catch the lapels of his coat and pull him closer. Heat rushed through him as she inspected him, patting down his shirt and fixing his tie with her soft hands. His heart pounded away in his chest, thumping to a beat he hardly knew. Her lips pulled slightly when she spoke, and it took him every ounce of will not to coax his own onto hers just so he could feel them tremble under his touch.

 _Would her lips tremble if I kissed her?_ Changmin doesn’t think he’ll ever let himself know.

“I’d like some champagne, if you don’t mind. And thanks, darling.” Yoona smiled at him easily, the endearment tumbling out of her mouth so naturally he almost believed it. Instead he nodded once and took a step back, turning away to let out a breath he didn’t know he held in when she was so _so_ close.

He hardly noticed their company speak just as he left and only realized her presence when she’d stepped in time with him. Changmin didn’t have to look to know who it was – appearances may have changed but he doubted that he would ever forget her voice.

“The last I saw we saw each other, you were barely reaching the top cupboard. Nowadays, I think you’d be able to get anything if you really wanted it.” Jessica said, grinning as they made their way towards the refreshment table. She expected no response and that was certainly what she got.

She didn’t mind. She was prepared for this.

The crowd parted as they passed, whispering along the way at the newcomers’ appearances and their involvement to certain people.

( _“Isn’t that the New York designer? She came with Donghae, didn’t she?” “President Im said he met his future son-in-law just now… do you suppose that’s him?” “She’s quite beautiful but cold looking, I think. Are you sure Donghae is seeing her?” “He doesn’t seem to talk at all from what I hear. I wonder why Miss Yoona would date him.”_ )

They reached the table without much trouble, easily ignoring the whispers that surrounded them all the while. She ordered for them with her golden smile, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she did so and watched him look back at where they came from silently. Jessica knew that no doubt Donghae would be telling them funny anecdotes from his recent trip and that their company would be laughing when they came back – but there was something about the way Changmin chose to stare that made her heart lilt with familiarity.

There was a look of love in his eyes – unbridled now that he was away from the one Jessica supposed he was hiding it from. Suppose that answered her mind’s earlier question… and now to more pressing matters.

They waited patiently for their drinks to be poured, neither speaking as the crowd moved on around them. He looked too far away, gripping his iPad under his arm as she continued to watch him silently. Changmin might have felt uncomfortable with her gaze, but he didn’t let on. He didn’t let on anyone of his feelings.

 _As he should…_ Jessica smiled tenderly, feeling a wave of compassion awash her as she stood. _After all, he was taught to keep his emotions to himself_.

“You were taught better manners than that you know.” She began, nudging him with her elbow. He didn’t turn, didn’t even move. “It was in the house rules, under number 4: Always greet your family with respect.”

Changmin stood up a little straighter at her spoken words, though he still refused to face her. Jessica continued without a bother, even as the drinks came and he made no move to get them.

“ _Greet your family with respect._ That includes your older sister, no?”

 

* * *

 

“I love her.” He begins slowly, suddenly and enunciating the words with such a finality that she could hardly remember to breathe. “I want to marry her, but I’m still not sure how to ask her just yet.”

Donghae said this on the very second Eunhyuk and Hyoyeon left to have a dance, ten minutes after Changmin and Jessica departed to get refreshments and five after he told her a funny story about a New York man and his dog. If Yoona knew any better she would have thought he’d planned to cage her all along with the sudden announcement, rendering her speechless and her mind reeling as her eyes widened in shock. Her heart was unconsciously ripped out of her, brutally crushed under the words he’d just spoken so nonchalantly.

The muscle lurched against her chest in thumps too strong. _Heart attack?_ Her mind thought briefly, spinning for a moment over medical terms and such as though she was in school and on the spot. _Myocardial ischemia? CVD?_

Except she wasn’t in school or on the spot. She wasn’t anywhere near a hospital or her professors. She was in her own home, in a gorgeous dress and in front of the man she loved as he kicked and mashed her heart under his heel.

“Is it too soon for me to say this to you?” Donghae said quickly in panic, his eyes widening at the sudden paleness her skin took to his declaration. He mentally kicked himself for being too rash, completely forgetting their situation – their break-up that hadn’t ended in better terms that he’d hoped for. “I’m sorry. I forgot about that rule. Three months or other before…”

“Don’t… please.” Yoona started, wheezing almost of air as his eyes worriedly looked into hers. “I—I was just surprised is all. You just said it all of a sudden that I…”

“Forgot to breathe?” he finished for her, smiling just a little bit that she felt torn into wanting to beat him and kiss him for being a handsome pompous ass at the same time. He let out a nervous chuckle at himself and looked away, realizing his mistake immediately. He always was bad at keeping time with his jokes; they usually always were too flat or horrible in deliver. Often falling short of the mood when he told them, and this was exactly one of those times.

Donghae cleared his throat, glancing around him uneasily. And Yoona felt like hugging him like she always had when he made a mistake. “That wasn’t the right time to joke. Sorry.”

“No, it wasn’t.” She agreed, stopping her hand from reaching to touch him. Her heart twisted painfully as his eyes met hers again and then looked away quickly, searching elsewhere beyond her. Yoona knew better than to follow his gaze but she couldn’t help herself, and when she did – she wished that she hadn’t in the first place.

“Did you… love her before…” she trailed off, not wanting to finish the question. _Did you love her before me_ was what she wanted to ask but couldn’t bring herself to say the words.

Donghae nodded slowly, looking back at her. “Yes. We were together all throughout middle school and highschool. We only broke up because her family moved away.”

“So… you’ve been waiting for her all this time?”

Yoona was afraid of the answer, but she wanted to know. She wanted to know even if it meant putting a stake through her heart bringing her closer and closer to the truth. She realized then how much she didn’t know about him – she felt ashamed.

He sighed, shifting in his stance from left to right. “No. I thought she was never coming back,” he explained, shrugging, “She didn’t even tell me where she was going so I didn’t know where to start. And then after two years in college without hearing from her, I just… when I met you, I… I thought I was over her.”

“Oh.”

“I did, no, I do care about you, Yoona. Still and very much.” He told her, as if trying to appease her aching psyche. It did little to soothe the hurt, but it brought her to step closer. His hand reached out to touch her cheek, lingering only for a moment before he pulled back.

Only rightly so as their respective partners had just come back with both of them sporting unusual expressions on their faces. Yoona tried to breathe normally when Changmin stepped close, assessing the situation with his intense gaze that directed itself to her after a moment. She tried to smile to reassure but found she couldn’t as Jessica wound herself towards Donghae and kissed him tenderly on the cheek – like a woman in love who couldn’t keep herself far from the man her heart beat for.

The muscle in her chest tilted against her chest and Yoona choked back a sob in her throat. She downed her glass of champagne in one gulp, much to everyone’s (Changmin’s, Donghae’s and Jessica’s) surprise and slammed it over the free table beside them.

“Can we dance?” She said more than asked briskly, pulling Changmin out into the floor and away from the couple without another look back. She placed his hands over her waist roughly; not caring of the surprised looks people threw them and put hers over his shoulders.

Tears began to spring into her eyes as they began to sway to the music and she breathed deeply when Changmin’s eyes stared down into hers again. She shook her head, lowering her eyes from his. “Don’t look at me, okay?” She said uncertainly, her tone afraid and hurt, “Just dance with me for awhile.”

Feeling him nod once at her request, Yoona sighed in relief as the music lulled her aching heart. The lyrics of the song calmed her as they swayed in time, his hands holding her as close as she wanted them to be.

[ _It's gonna hurt when it heals too / It'll all get better in time_ ]

 _I know this song_ , Yoona thought to herself as they danced. Couples all around began to fill the floor and sway as well but she paid no attention to them as she listened to the song playing through the room.

[ _I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to / It'll all get better in time_ ]

“This is the song you played for me when we first met…” Yoona said to him softly, raising her head to look at him. Though she felt like crying her heart out, a small smile graced her lips as she spoke. “You remember?”

Without his iPad to respond for him (which he left on the table when she pulled him suddenly), Changmin nodded his head to her question. _Yeah, I remember_ , he told her in his mind as they moved to the jazz notes playing. _I’m surprised you remember as well._

“I like this song…” She said, drifting off as her gaze dropped again and she remembered the moment when he’d played it for her. The pain was fresh then and even now after Donghae’s sudden declaration. She started to tremble as tears threatened to spill, her voice rough when she added, “He never loved me. Not as much anyway.”

She’d wondered for so long since that day why Donghae would have left her so easily like that. She wanted to horrible answer so she could hate him, something vile so she could despise him forever. But perhaps she should have known not to hope for a terrible reason from him at all. Donghae was a good man, the very best really who loved more than—

 _Now you know, Yoona. That’s_ his _terrible reason._ Yoona told herself helplessly, hating herself for her own weakness. _Donghae loved more than anyone, the only problem is that it isn’t you_.

And as much as she wanted to hate him – she knew she couldn’t. And that was much a reason to call her an idiot if any.

A tear managed to trail down her cheek as they danced, pooling a drop unto her chin as she shivered. It would have fallen if Changmin hadn’t moved to wipe it away, touching her skin with his fingers gently as he tipped her head to look at him. He stared down at her, appraising the defeated (but surprised) look in her eyes and the slightly tremble of her chin before cupping her cheek so tenderly she could do nothing but watch his face inch closer and closer to hers.

This might have been a mistake but there wasn’t anything in him to stop him from going for what he was about to do. _If he doesn’t love you, then I think…_ His mind wandered off as Changmin’s eyes focused on her lips.

_If he doesn’t love you, then I think that maybe I do._

And when his lips met hers, feather light at first and slowly deepening, both of them found that pulling away was the least they wanted to do.


	11. Chapter 11

_Soft._

The first word that came to mind the moment Changmin’s lips touched hers was _soft_. Yoona didn’t know what else to think when he’d put her in this position – wrapped in his arms and kissing her sincerely that it took the very breath in her lungs away. His mouth closed over hers gently, breathing life into her limbs with a tingling sensation that bit warmth into her senses.

 _He’s… really good at this_ , Yoona thought to herself as her arms unconsciously tightened around his shoulders and she responded into the kiss. His own arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer and she knew— _I should push him away from me_.

In the back of her mind, she knew she should. But somehow no strength came to her to take a step back. The kiss he’d given her was so gentle, so sweet… _so good_. How could she stop something that felt _wonderful_?

 _Because this is not for real._ Her heart ached at the thought, knowing it was the absolute truth. It hurt knowing it was this way, and for a moment she wondered if she was hurt because she wanted it to be real.

 _He’s just kissing you to prove a point to everyone._ The ill-spirited side of herself poked at her incessantly. _He’s not holding you because he wants to. He’s just doing his part. He’s just—_

But it felt _so right_. His warm hands held her just close enough at the small of her back, anchoring her against him as their lips responded to each other in a way that blurred the lines of real and pretend. It was kiss that gnawed at her senses, spilling hunger into her limbs. A kiss that evoked emotions she hadn’t felt as intensely with… _anyone_ before Changmin and yet,

_This is just pretend._

Changmin pulled away from her suddenly. Their lips separating slowly as he drew back to look at her opening her eyes in a daze. Yoona’s brow wrinkled in confusion for a moment as she regained focus and her vision, staring back at the dark depths of Changmin’s eyes.

“Changmin?” she murmured uncertainly, vaguely disappointed as he gently pushed her back away from him. Her arms still draped lazily over his shoulders and he gave her a smile in response before stepping further away with still one hand wrapped around the curve of her waist.

He cocked his head to the side, smirking a little at her still mystified expression. His eyes spoke to her in volumes ringing in her ear, teasing her and it was then she finally took that moment to take a look around her. Her cheeks flushed pink when she realized that the music had stopped and that they were the only couple left on the dance floor.

Thankfully no one else was paying them much attention. That is except for a couple of people.

Yoona raised her eyes to meet her father’s amused grin, coupled alongside with Hyoyeon and Eunhyuk’s catcalling, Jessica’s soft smile and Donghae’s…

She frowned at the hard gaze her ex-boyfriend sent her way and immediately drew her eyes elsewhere. She’d seen that look before. It was one Donghae would give to anything or _anyone_ that crossed him and for once she found that his usually mild-mannered temper was completely misguided.

 _Why would he look at me like that?_ Yoona thought, frowning to herself. _He’d already made it perfectly clear that he doesn’t love me anymore. Why should he care if another man kissed me senseless just now?_

Her cheeks flushed red at the last thought, glancing back at the man holding her close by her torso. She couldn’t have helped it even if she tried not to look at Changmin’s lips because those soft slips of flesh still made her feel them on hers. She flushed further when he turned towards her again and cocked an eyebrow in question, half in amusement and curiosity.

Somehow she regretted ever making their arrangement in the first place. If she had known that things would progress this way, she might not have even talked to him at all.

Someone in the room coughed somewhere and with a steady grace that surprised her herself, Yoona placed a light but showy kiss on Changmin’s cheek before pulling him with her out of the dance floor.

They needed to talk about this new clause of the arrangement. Physical affection had never been brought up before and now was as good as any time to bring the subject to light.

“Going up for some air, Yoong?” Hyoyeon sing-songed cutely, wiggling her eyebrows as the couple slowly began to walk past. Her grin widened further when both Yoona and Changmin rolled their eyes at her but said nothing, continuing along their way towards the staircase with her best friend’s pretend boyfriend’s hand still pressed closely against her torso.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” she called after them, laughing aloud.

She hardly cared when her group fell quiet, staring at her in surprise. But she did notice how the couple ahead of her stiffened considerably, eyes wide in shock as they looked back at her with unabashed annoyance.

 _Whoops!_ Hyoyeon blinked and then quickly realized her words, sprouting apologetic words at an alarmed Mr. Im beside her.

“I’m sorry, Daddy Im! You know Yoona would never let anything happen before marriage, right?” she declared loudly, shooing her bestfriend and ‘her boy’ to their business as she rallied herself in front of the concerned father.

Sometimes Yoona really _hated_ her best friend.

“ _Kim Hyoyeon, I swear I am going to_ —”

Glare.

“Hyo, you are _not_ helping—”

“Hon, this _isn’t_ the time to be—”

“Be quiet all of you, it’s alright.” Mr. Im declared suddenly with a smile, his hand raised good-naturedly to keep the younger generation in line. He took in their similar looks of awe and shrugged. “I trust my daughter, of course, and Changmin.”

“Really?!” Hyoyeon squealed, clasping her hands together.

Mr. Im nodded, waving slightly at Changmin and Yoona’s mutually wide-eyed stares before motioning for someone to turn his wheelchair away.

“Really.” He affirmed as he was wheeled away, leaving them all still slack-jawed in his wake.

“Well, it looks like you got the all-clear, Shim!” Eunhyuk said, grinning slyly at the taller male. Changmin flushed and grunted at his words, turning his head towards Yoona for—any confirmation that one just transpired was real and not… imaginary.

“I’m surprised myself,” she muttered lamely, still shocked at these turn of events.

Yoona saw Donghae throw a concerned look at her from her peripheral vision and her heart gave way for him again. She straightened at this and turned her head, catching Changmin’s eyes. His long fingers pressed against her waist in question and she tilted her head, her voice clear and intimate (loud enough, really, for Donghae to lower his eyes and his lips to press tight in a line).

She didn’t care at this point if she was stepping over bounds of the agreement (they were going to talk about it anyway) and pressed another light kiss on Changmin’s cheek.

“Let’s go upstairs, Changmin.”

 

* * *

  
Changmin was going to die.

He felt it in his bones as Yoona led him down the darkened second floor hallway of her home. In movies, jackasses were always killed in dark places first and he knew for a fact that he was the biggest one at the moment.

For a second (as he was afraid for his life), Changmin regretted kissing her. But as quickly as the thought had entered his mind, it quickly vanished when stars came into view and he stepped out into a wide veranda overlooking the Im’s gorgeous estate.

It was a beautiful night, calm and cool and glittering under the stars’ shine.

Changmin let his arm fall as Yoona drifted away from him, watching the night sky above. She walked over to the railing, her hands touching the border just so before turning her head to look back at him. Her hair fell in waves over her shoulder, her opalescent skin shining under the moonlight…

His chest heaved as he took steps forward, closer to her.

It was a _damn_ beautiful night, alright.

“How could you kiss me like that?” was the first question that slipped from her lips the second he was close enough to hear.

The look in her eyes was almost panicked—and it made him feel uncomfortable. He didn’t want to her paranoid of him. It was the _last_ reaction he wanted from her.

“We didn’t even talk about this and then you go kissing me as if—”

He thought about responding. And his mouth almost opened at the prospect before he caught himself in the act again. Wanting to speak twice in _one night_ was a record for him, and it made him even more uncomfortable than before.

 _This woman is trouble_ , his mind reaffirmed disdainfully and he agreed.

He decided on putting his hands in his pocket instead.

Yoona noticed this and barreled on, shivering a little bit at the cold wind picking up around them.

“Well, aren’t you going to explain your—oh, why did you leave the iPad in the room anyway?!”

All she got for a response was a raised eyebrow and she bristled derisively, folding her arms across her chest. “Fine, we were dancing so of course you have to leave it on the table but—” Her eyes widened at the grin forming on his lips and she pushed at his shoulder in an attempt to scold him, “Why are you laughing?!”

Changmin doubled over, his shoulders shaking as he kept the sound of his laughter in. He couldn’t help it—the panicked look he thought she had on her face earlier was completely gone now and was replaced instead by an angry expression that was more cute than threatening.

He _had to_ laugh. Yoona was trouble, yes, but she was entertaining.

She slapped him over the shoulder again. “This is _not funny_ , Changmin. I should kick you but I don’t want to ruin this dress and—”

Yoona stopped as their eyes met, his electrifying gaze paralyzing her almost instantaneously as he calmed his laughter and grinned. She shivered again, not from the cold but from the look he threw her way and her hands dropped to her sides.

“What?” she asked, her tone suddenly soft as he removed his jacket. His eyes never left hers and she might not have even noticed him moving if he hadn’t placed the garment heavily onto her shoulders, encasing her warmly from the cold night air.

Changmin rubbed heat with his hands over her cloaked shoulders, smiling softly at her as she stared and her heart thumped—once, twice but heavily—in her chest.

Yoona lowered her eyes from his with great difficulty. “Don’t… don’t look at me like that.”

His only reply was a warm breath (a sigh, a “ _Sorry_ ”) hitting her forehead.

“Can we agree that the next time you decide to kiss me, you should at least signal first?” she started, turning this time and wrapping herself deeper into his suit jacket. It smelled like him, dark and masculine. It was oddly comforting. “A brush on the cheek or a wink would do. Just don’t surprise me next time.”

She cleared her throat. “And by n-next time, I mean only for emergencies like earlier. I was about to sob, remember? So you kissed me to cover it up?”

Yoona heard him move rather than saw him, her hand tingling at the light brush of his hand next to hers on the railing. Her heart heaved again as his fingers traced over hers.

“That’s the reason why you kissed me, right?”

Changmin thought he might have answered her if he wasn’t so guarded. He might have pronounced words he wanted to say aloud if he would just let himself heal. He might have told her that he kissed her for entirely different reasons ( _curiosity, loyalty, jealousy, love_ ) than those she’d suggested if only he was brave enough to do so.

But he wasn’t brave. Not yet anyway, or anymore. _I don’t know._

He thought of his sisters, his adoptive parents, his half-sister Jessica, his mother—and his throat closed up again.

“Changmin?”

He wrapped an arm around her and nodded, pulling her into a side hug she eventually relaxed into after a few seconds processing his response to her question.

“Okay, good. I just don’t want to complicate things.”

Changmin smiled at this and nodded again, even though in his mind he knew it was already complicated right from the start.

_She didn’t need to know that yet though._

He listened to her mention something about the stars being unusually bright that night and quietly breathed her in. Their hearts beating in time as they stood side by side.

_Not yet._


	12. Chapter 12

The crisp green grass crunched under her feet as she walked alone through the quiet park in the late afternoon. She’d been there several times before, when she was younger and an innocent. She had been happy then in a way only a child could be, surrounded by a loving mother and doting on a brother she cared for more than anything in the world—but those days were long gone now. Those happy memories quickly fading as the days passed by…

Jessica always thought that the events in her family’s history had happened for a reason. That the loss she’d felt in the absence of her mother’s free mind had been caused by something bigger than her brother’s sudden disappearance. That her father had been right to tell her that her brother wasn’t really her brother, and that their relocating would help them heal.

Her father had always been a strict man; morally upright and good, but most often chose methods too severe to fathom. She’d never truly understood how her father had doted on her so diligently when he had a son to carry on their name, but at her young age then this detail never mattered long enough for her to care. She had assumed that it was because she was the first-born that she needed to be molded well to carry the name.

She never thought of his negligence to her brother then delved into matters that she wouldn’t have known if not for his deathbed letter. If not for her uncovering the truth behind her brother’s origins; of her mother’s affairs and her father’s harsh actions…

Jessica desperately wanted to say that her family’s actions were right (they were done to keep their names (her name) afloat, to keep their family together), but personally she knew that they weren’t.

And now, after almost a decade of lies and concealment, she has finally had enough.

Her distracted steps took her close to the water, far from the usual park goers’ spots but close enough to be seen from the gate she’d expected her companion to come from. She’d taken it into herself to make sure that she would be ready once she settled down on the bench; ready to speak her mind and uncover the truths that had long since eluded her because of her father’s ideals.

Jessica made sure to ready to tell Changmin, her brother, that half or not—he had always been part of her family and that she’d been searching for him since the day she found out the truth of his forced disappearance.

Crisp fall leaves crunched behind her and she listened as those careful steps drew closer to her bench. She didn’t have to turn around to know that the person she was meeting had finally arrived. It was, after all, always been Changmin’s way to be quiet in everything he did.

“I was beginning to worry you weren’t going to meet me, little brother,” Jessica started with a smile, patting the seat next to her as Changmin moved up to her. He had a slight grimace on his face as he took the seat next to her, carefully gripping the iPad he brought in his hands.

“I’m glad my private investigator got hold of the correct mobile number,” she said, looking out into the water. A family of ducks swam by, unaware of them and she smiled. “The first few people I hired all failed to get me working number, but then again I suppose the third time’s the charm.”

Changmin merely shrugged in response to her words, straightening in his seat with the iPad propped carelessly on his lap. The screen was dark and she briefly wondered if she’ll get a worded response at all.

Jessica observed him for a moment. Taking in the stiffness of his posture and the hard set of his jaw, she deduced that he was neither happy nor excited to be meeting with her at all. She was grateful that he’d come nevertheless and she didn’t hold it against him to be hostile. She’d been absent long enough in his life to blame him for any of his actions from here on out.

Her eyes appreciated the fact that a life alone in Seoul had been—more or less—forgiving to him. Changmin was healthy by all standards, tall and broad-shouldered. Handsome as she always known he would grow up to be and reserved. She learned from her late father’s letter that he had not been too harsh and left Changmin to fend for himself but instead sent him to live with one of his former contractors with a fee. The family that had taken him in asked no questions and nurtured him well as though he was their own… a fact that she was most thankful for. Changmin deserved the kind of love the Choi family gave without question. He deserved more than her father never thought to bestow upon him.

She watched as his fingers gripped the iPad in his lap. He was uncomfortable with her staring, and though she didn’t want him to feel that way—Jessica knew very well that she could _not_ just stop.

She had missed her brother. She had missed _him_ terribly. And she was determined to get him back to her family in any way she could.

“The party the other night was nice, wasn’t it? The food was really good. I forgot how good authentic Korean food really is.” Jessica said, keeping her tone light and cheery. Changmin shifted in his seat as though in agreement but didn’t turn his head. Instead he continued on staring straight ahead, watching the family of ducks she was observing earlier with a forced interest.

The thought made her smile and she let herself laugh aloud.

“Oh, come on! Don’t look at me like I’m crazy when I’m not the one feigning interest at a group of yellow bills!” She exclaimed, shaking her head in mirth as Changmin raised an eyebrow at her. “As if you’ve never seen a duck before in your life! You used to have one as pet when you were five!”

He blinked in response, a ghost of a smirk edging onto his lips as he appraised her words. And then he shrugged good-naturedly before leaning back into his seat more comfortably. It was a far better response than what she’d gotten from the party the other night; the awkward air around them slowly diminishing at the thoughtful exchange. His amicable reaction surprised her a bit, but she couldn’t have expected another response.

 _Better than nothing_ , she thought with a smile. _At least he’s in a better mood than when I spoke to him at the party…_

Jessica’s smile slowly widened as her trail of thoughts continued.

 _Actually, he was in better mood after he and Yoona went to talk privately elsewhere. Did something happen between them?_ She wondered with a grin, looking over at Changmin’s profile again. He was looking down at his iPad now, flicking through photos from said party—lingering a few seconds longer than necessary at some particular images.

Images that showed a stunning young woman in an emerald green dress, smiling wide and laughing as his eyes took the photo in with a kind of affection that Jessica was very familiar to. Familiar in the sense that she knew she’d looked at Donghae the same way before they got together… a look of adoration, of content… of _love._

“You must really like her, huh?” She asked with an amused smile as Changmin finally turned to look at her. His eyes widened in surprise, caught off guard by her question as though he’d forgotten where he was. Jessica patted him on the shoulder reassuringly and continued, “I would look at Donghae’s photos the same way too… with a half-smile on my face. At least, that’s what he tells me.”

/I’m not exactly sure I follow what you’re saying./ Changmin wrote, finally giving her the worded response she was hoping for from the beginning. His brow knitted together in confusion, surprised by her sudden insinuation of his relationship with Yoona. He hadn’t realized he was looking at Yoona any differently; not even at her pictures but apparently he had if Jessica’s raised eyebrow was any indication.

He continued to write as Jessica only smirked in response. /I assumed you wanted to meet me here to talk about something else rather than my love life./

“I don’t really think you’re ready to talk about Mom yet.” She said pointedly, her grin wide when Changmin’s face instantaneously darkened. She patted him on the shoulder reassuringly, dismissing his dimmed gaze with another smile before leaning back against the bench.

Jessica shrugged casually, looking up at the sky. “And that’s okay because I’m not ready to tell you either.”

Changmin considered her for a moment before nodding.

There would be time later to talk about their past. There would be time to relive old hurts and open wounds…

For now— _silence_ was all that they needed.


	13. Chapter 13

“Oppa mentioned that you lived in a big house… but I think he was being too kind. This place is gigantic!”

Yoona chuckled at the sight of Sooyoung’s jaw dropping as they stepped into her house. They hauled bags and boxes into the marble walkway and set them on the floor as soon as they were inside the cool expanse of her home. They stood for a moment, relishing in the air wafting in from the centralized air-conditioning before Yoona motioned for Sooyoung to follow her into the living room and they fell heavily on soft couches with twin sighs of relief.

It had been a long and tiring day of shopping—an activity which she would not have enjoyed doing at any other time but Kim Hyoyeon was planning her a birthday party and as it was, she was also very persuasive. There wasn’t really much she could do but follow her command… even if it meant lifting heavy bags of shoes and dresses to fill her best friend’s so-called quota.

Yoona was grateful that Sooyoung had happily agreed to come along and accompany her while Hyoyeon was stuck finishing her last few days of make-up duty at the hospital.

“Thanks for helping me out today, Sooyoung. I would have never heard the end of it from Hyoyeon if I didn’t get anything new for that birthday party she’s been planning since we got out of rotation a few weeks ago.” Yoona said, her voice muffled by the pillow she had laid on face down.

She turned her head a fraction to the side and bit back a chuckle at Sooyoung who lying across from her in another couch, sporting a similar lying position. She smiled, tucking her chin onto a throw pillow. “You’ve met Hyoyeon and her extravagant way of—er, speaking. I’m sure you can imagine what I mean.”

“It’s no problem. I’ve never gone on a major spree before so even though my feet hurt, I thought that today was really fun.” Sooyoung replied, raising her head from the pillow she had pulled onto her face. She yawned a little, as if to prove her tiredness from the day’s events even though her smile remained intact and bright on her face. “I don’t go to a lot of parties because I also work part-time after classes so I don’t really know much about how they work.”

“Believe me, Sooyoung, if it wasn’t for Hyoyeon I probably would stay indoors all the time.”

Sooyoung smiled at this and nodded. “Didn’t you just attend a party the other night though?” she asked, her eyes wide as she picked herself up and sat cross-legged on the couch. “Changmin-oppa wore that suit you got him the other day for a party he said you were throwing.”

“Yeah, it was a party honoring my father’s homecoming from the hospital,” Yoona explained, sitting up as well to face her companion. She continued, shrugging her shoulders while at the same time wrapping her arms around a pillow on her lap. “This is my 23rd birthday though so Hyoyeon’s making a really big deal about it because she knows I won’t.”

“I probably would be too if it were mine.” She replied, grinning from ear to ear. She had a suspicious twinkle in her eyes, probably from imagining herself in the near future. Yoona had to chuckle at her enthralled expression—it looked like Sooyoung was quickly losing herself from the reality.

Except she wasn’t because a moment later she happily quipped, “Gosh, I can’t wait to be old!”

Yoona pretended to be offended and scoffed in indignation. “Gee, thanks!”

“I don’t mean you look old! I just meant I can’t wait to get the freedom you guys have. I’m 20 and all but my brother insists that he’ll treat me like I’m 9 until I’m legally 21 years old.” Sooyoung explained, laughing as Yoona’s mock-frown stayed in place, even after she threw one of the smaller throw pillows at her direction. The slightly-older woman caught it easily with one hand, tossing it back after a moment’s thought, smiling wide as she wiggled her eyebrows and made a comical face.

“Well, you’re still his little sister—adopted or not,” Yoona replied, giving her a pointed look that made Sooyoung think that she was seeing the female-version of her brother’s patented ‘Don’t-argue’ stare. She had to swallow the urge to let out an unladylike snort at the realization, causing her unnie to raise an eyebrow while she spoke, “He’s kind of allowed to baby you until you’re capable to live on your own.”

“Yeah, yeah. And I appreciate it, believe me… but sometimes I wish he’d give me a break when it comes to the guys I like.”

Yoona wrinkled her nose at the last statement, thinking back to the first days she had with Sooyoung and her senior Siwon’s unusual attendance by her bedside. She recalled the pink-tipped ears her senior sported while being teased by Hyoyeon and how Changmin rolled his eyes over and over every time Sooyoung gushed about the young doctor. Changmin, in his older brother mode, was endearing—and while she understood his protectiveness, she also thought it was a tad bit excessive at times too.

“Still giving you flak about liking Siwon-sunbae, huh?”

Sooyoung nodded vigorously with a loud whine, “He thinks he’s too old for me! Pssh, he’s only 28!”

“Which gives the two of you an 8-year gap…?” Yoona trailed off, counting her fingers dubiously with a grin as Sooyoung’s eyes widened accusingly. She threw her hands up just as a pillow was launched to her face, successfully blocking the force of the object with her palms. She threw her head back and laughed as Sooyoung pelted her with a few more pillows before running out, slumping back into her couch with a huff.

“Oh, don’t start, Yoona-unnie! You sound just like Oppa!” she said, frowning with her arms crossed across her chest, “You’re supposed to be on _my_ side _! Hoes before bros_ and that sort of thing!”

“Sorry, Soo,” Yoona replied, still grinning despite the few teardrops wedged in the corner of her eyes from laughing too hard. She dusted and fluffed a pillow off the floor and threw it back to Sooyoung affectionately. “I’m obligated to agree with your brother too. He’s my boyfriend and all.”

The label seemed to appease Sooyoung’s mood and a smile easily made its way back into her face. “Yeah, yeah, I know. You lo~ove him.” She said, wiggling her eyebrows again—only this time for completely different reasons.

With a conspiratorial tone, she leaned forward onto her knees and whispered loudly, “So… did you guys ever make out in this room?”

“Sooyoung!” Yoona admonished, her cheeks flushing a deep red as Sooyoung squealed in excitement. She quickly bounded over to her side, latching onto Yoona’s arm so she wouldn’t escape. Yoona didn’t think she could have even if Sooyoung hadn’t locked her in place. She was still a little shocked that Changmin’s younger sister would even ask her about their— _er_ —affairs out loud.

Yoona always thought it was Yuri who was the loud, rash one. It’s beginning to seem like Sooyoung was the actual loudmouth of the siblings.

“What? I’m 20! I’ve had my fair share of kisses!” she exclaimed, poking her on the side with her index finger repeatedly.

“It’s really not something I’m comfortable talking to my boyfriend’s sister about.” Yoona explained, squirming away from Sooyoung’s fingers with a light swat of her hand. Her eyes drifted around the room, remembering quite well how well the space worked (without the couches) as a dance floor on the night of her father’s homecoming party. She could also remember the dance Changmin lead her on and the kiss they shared…

The deep but soft kiss Changmin had pressed against her lips that left her stomach fluttering as she responded comfortably… The kiss she hadn’t stopped thinking about since the party ended over a week ago.

Yoona felt her cheeks heat up again at the thought and she quickly fanned herself with one hand. She lowered her head just as Sooyoung let out an thrilled shriek that seemed to reverberate all over the room.

“A-ha! So you have made out here!”

Yoona shook her head almost violently, the redness of her cheeks only flushing even more with her actions. “No! Just—it’s— _yes_ , we’ve kissed here before but it’s not like you think!” she argued, pressing her palms over her cheeks in an attempt to cool them. It helped little to no good, but it at least helped hide a smudge of her embarrassment.

“Was it any good at least?” Sooyoung inquired, eyebrows wiggling again, “The kiss?”

She wasn’t entirely sure how to answer that question. It didn’t feel quite right to agree because technically Changmin was _not_ her actual boyfriend—only pretend—but she couldn’t lie and say it wasn’t either. Because it was nice—the kiss was really nice and she did enjoy herself, despite the reasons behind it. It was one of the best kisses she’s ever had in her almost 23 years of existence.

Sooyoung was still looking at her expectantly and with a loud sigh, Yoona nodded fervently—her tone hushed as she finally answered, “Yes.”

The response was instantaneous and very, _very_ loud. Yoona worried for a second if the maids could hear all the way across the mansion but as Sooyoung clapped her hands in glee and pulled her into a tight hug, she couldn’t find the heart to care anymore than nil. At least her pretend relationship with Changmin was believable enough for his sister. That was something, right?

“Ha! No wonder he came home practically bursting!” Sooyoung said after pulling her back from the hug, practically beaming as she clapped her hands again in excitement. Her grin was wide and contagious, knocking elbows with Yoona as she made herself comfortable against the plush couch. “I almost thought he was going to speak with that grin on his face!”

The admission made Yoona pause her smile in surprise and she looked to her companion for any sign if it was a joke or not. She had noticed once or twice before how Changmin would open his mouth at times, as though desperate to speak, only to close it again after a moment passed. She never thought much of it before, but had wondered sometimes if it his decision to be mute was something he could easily change given the right motive. She silently hoped he would speak one day, just to satisfy her curiosity.

Yoona sometimes found herself wondering what he’d sound like.

“But, of course, he didn’t.”

“Nope!”

Yoona felt her smile falter a little, disappointed even though she knew she shouldn’t be. It wasn’t like she couldn’t tell that Changmin was the type who was resolute in his choices. He set a goal and he went for it no matter what. She just wished she didn’t feel so… _cheated_ somehow. It made _no sense_ at all but that was how she felt. “I guess I should be impressed by his tenacity then.” She replied, nodding her head as her fingers played listlessly with each other on her lap.

It felt like a lifetime later when Sooyoung decided to speak again. “He used to talk, you know.” She began, making Yoona turn her head towards her voice in interest. Sooyoung had a peculiar expression on her face, one that had her lips turned slightly upwards in a wistful smile. “Changmin-oppa used to talk.”

“Did he really?” she asked, her tone lilting a little in anticipation. “What did he sound like?”

“He was never really talkative to begin with but he spoke to us when he felt like he needed to before. He wasn’t a complete mute back then.” Sooyoung explained, turning sideways to face her and bring her knees close to her chest. Yoona followed suit, setting herself up similarly before she spoke again, “He had that kind of melodious baritone middle-school Hallyu fangirls go crazy for. When he first came to the house even I was a little in love with his voice.”

Yoona had to smile at that last part because she believed that to be true. It wasn’t at all hard to imagine that Changmin would have that kind of quality in his voice. He was already attractive all on his own and the mysterious aura about him certainly helped boost his appeal even more. Still, she wondered how all of this—his vow of silence and the gloomy aura he exuded—came about.

What was he like before everything? What kind of guy was he?

She worried her lower lip, biting it between her teeth before nudging Sooyoung’s foot with her own. “Could you… tell me about it? About him before the whole whiteboard thing?” she asked, unable to deny her curiosity any longer. She _had to_ know—she didn’t know exactly why she felt this way but she did. And since Changmin didn’t seem to want to share, Sooyoung seemed to be next best thing.

“You don’t have to tell me if it’s a family matter though. I understand if it should be kept secret,” she added quickly, wringing her hands out nervously. Curious or not, she didn’t want to step out of line either.

Sooyoung shook her head slowly, placing a hand over her wringing ones. She gave her a little smile.  “No, it’s not really a family matter… and I want to tell you, to be honest.” She said, patting their hands together. “If anyone should know, I feel like it should be you.”

Taking a deep breath, Sooyoung began sharing a part of her family history:

“My mother brought him home one day when I was six. He was 10 years old—almost 11 actually—and already really brooding back then. Mom told me that she found him wondering around the street and took him home because he looked scared and lost.” Sooyoung paused, her lips lifting a little into a melancholic smile. Yoona wasn’t sure if it was because of the memory or the thought of her mother. She thought it best not to interrupt and ask. “I mean, could you imagine my brother looking scared and lost? I knew it was a lie right from the start because there was storm around the time and if Oppa was wondering around the streets, he should have been drenched when he came to us… but anyway, that doesn’t matter. I’d been an only child for six years and really wanted a playmate who could play with me without crying. Yuri always cried but Oppa didn't. Serious as he was, Changmin-oppa was my first real friend.”

Sooyoung’s pensive expression turned dark a moment later and with it, her grip over Yoona’s hands tightened slightly. “It was only later when I was about 15 years old that I learned that Oppa had been sent away with my mom by her boss. It turns out that Changmin had somehow become a burden to his biological family and her boss wanted to get rid of him.”

Yoona felt her chest tighten in shock. “That’s awful! How could anyone do that to their own child?!”

“That’s what I thought too but… I don’t think he was legitimate in the first place if my mother’s boss wanted him gone.” Sooyoung said, shrugging in a beaten manner. Yoona’s brow furrowed at this.

“What do you mean?”

“My mother worked for a man named Jung,” Sooyoung said in tone that sounded like her _answer_ should already suffice her inquiries. Yoona’s chest pulled tighter at the realization and her brow furrowed further together in worry. “My brother uses the surname Shim. It’s in his birth certificate and all of his legal documents. It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together…”

This was something she couldn’t quite believe. There had to be a better—less _tragic_ —explanation. “It could be his mother’s surname. There are people who use their maiden names instead of their paternal names.” Yoona surmised, biting the inside of her cheek nervously.

Sooyoung shrugged again. She shot her a look that said she had also thought the same before. “ _Maybe_. But why would he have to use his mother’s surname if he was legitimately his father’s son?”

Yoona had to give her that point. It wouldn’t have made any sense to use someone else’s name if one could use their father’s.

“So… what does that have to do with him not speaking?”

“My dad… He was an engineer and a really good one too. Changmin-oppa worked for him part time after he turned 18 because he said didn’t want to go to college. It helped my dad’s company a lot to have him around because during the time he was really short in staff. The company went on to do a little better than expected at the time, but…” Sooyoung trailed off, sighing loudly as tears began to permeate the corners of her eyes. Yoona reached out to hold their hands tighter together, squeezing lightly in an attempt to reassure her to which she responded with a small but grateful smile.

“My parents were separating then. My father had caught my mother cheating on him with a manager from his company. That manager also embezzled from him, taking almost half of the company’s money before promptly quitting once the affair had been found out. The bastard took my mother along with him and they moved elsewhere, leaving us without a word.” She let out a bitter laugh once the tears she’d been holding started to slide down her cheeks and Yoona herself felt her own tears do the same. She knew the pain of having a mother disappear in a child’s life. The pain of losing a loved one, to death or to any other instance, damages the soul. Though their situations were different, the stab of pain was the same. Yoona could understand that. She understood it very well.

They sniffled together for a long moment, breathing in each other’s presence before Sooyoung continued, wiping her cheeks with a free hand.

“It was a painful time… but my father never let us on about his pain. He never even told us about my mother’s indiscretions until Yuri found the emails she sent asking Dad to forgive her and understand. Yuri told me and Changmin, of course, but we didn’t let my Dad know that we knew. I figured that he wanted to show us that he was strong.”

Yoona took a deep breath and vaguely remembering the vacant look in her mother’s eyes during her last days on earth. It was a lost and desperate look; one that let on the damage of one’s heart that medicine could not cure.

“But he wasn’t, was he?”

Sooyoung shook her head sadly, “No.”

She let out the breath she held in her chest. “Changmin told me once that they died…” she said quietly. Her nose was running but she could care less at the moment. All she could think about was that first bright, sunny day she’d spent with Changmin weeks and weeks ago.

 “It’s just like him to say that. I mean, obviously my mother isn’t. She’s off in God-knows-where with her new family but my dad is—” Sooyoung stopped abruptly, unable to continue as her face crumbled with suppressed emotion. She covered her hands over face, her shoulders shaking with the force of her sobs.

“He died.” Yoona said simply, wrapping her arms around her friend’s body—holding her in the way her older sister used to when she was a child and was afraid of lightning and thunder.

“One night, Oppa was asked to meet my dad at one of the buildings the company was building at the time. It was late, around midnight probably, when he called and my brother left. We were doing fine without my mother for a few months and Changmin-oppa was still talking bits and pieces then but—” Sooyoung took a deep breath to control herself, her tears flowing steadily as she burst,

“He—he jumped. My d-dad jumped off the building that night. I don’t know why. Changmin won’t tell me but I probably wouldn’t say either if I had been the one to see it happen with my own eyes. It completely obliterated his will to speak. They’d always been close, he and Dad. They would talk to each other quietly for hours at a time that Yuri and I would always try to ruin it by screaming or running around. And when Dad died…”

Yoona bit her lip as she trailed off again, crying as fresh tears assaulted her. It dawned to her then what Sooyoung meant to say but the admission of it did nothing to lessen the hurt she felt for the man she had bribed to help her. “Changmin decided not to speak anymore.” She finished for her, breathing heavily as a stab of pain sliced through her chest. The sadness she felt earlier was nothing compared to the realization of this portion of the story of Changmin’s silence resolve. This sadness stemmed deeper. It was not pity—it was pure grief for a person she’d come to care for.

“I’m so sorry.” She whispered, her voice cracking as her hold tightened over Sooyoung. “I’m so sorry.”

Sooyoung shook her head, pulling back to wipe her face with the back of her hands. “You don’t have to apologize, unnie. Dad was heartsick and he probably thought that death would be his only relief.”

“No, I understand that but—for _you_ to go through that. You were so young! And Yuri! I—Then for _Changmin_ to witness a loved one fall to his doom—I… I just can’t possibly imagine the pain he felt.” Yoona stumbled over her words, blubbering almost as her tears continued to pour despite her trying to stop them. She watched as Sooyoung crack a small smile at her after she finally calmed minutes later as she blew her nose on the handkerchief she kept in her purse.

“You really do like Oppa, don’t you?” She said without a hint of irony in her voice.

“What?” Yoona paused for a moment, weighing the word in her head. _Like?_ Did she like him?

She cared for him a great deal to feel so consumed of the story of his past, right? That must mean she did. Like him. She only wished she knew why.

 _Why did I want to know all of this?_ _Why am I crying? Why do I care?_

She had no clue.

“Yeah,” Yoona admitted a beat later, wiping at her nose. A blush rose to her cheeks, different from the blushing that colored her skin before—because this time it was for something she couldn’t quite understand yet. “Yes, I do.”

“I knew I liked you for him right from the start.” Sooyoung said, happier this time as their tears subsided. She reached over to envelop her in a hug. “Thank you for caring so much, unnie. It means so much to me and Oppa—though he shouldn’t know I told you any of this.”

Yoona let out a snort of laughter through her nose, hugging her back with a grin. She pulled back just a bit to put a finger over her mouth, wiggling her eyebrows in an almost conspiratorial manner, “I won’t tell if you won’t.”

They erupted into chuckles then, the mood calmer now that everything was out on the open. They hadn’t noticed the front door open and close as they finally got down to laying the contents of their shopping bags into piles. They were too immersed into mixing and matching outfits when Changmin finally made his presence known with his heavy steps across the marble floor.

Yoona looked just as he walked through the door, grinning and holding up his whiteboard in one hand and a bag of groceries in the other. Her heart squeezed at the way his hair fell over his eyes in an unruly tumble and the way his skin seemed tanner than usual for being out in a construction site again for the day against the white of his smile. He nodded at his sister as he came in and put the groceries down, ruffling Sooyoung’s hair before turning to her.

/Hey,/ the board said and it was all she needed to see before she stood up and threw her arms around his neck.

The impact of her jump surprised him, making him stumble back a little with a grunt. His arms wound around her immediately to regain his balance, holding her in place as her legs wrapped around his waist. Changmin faltered slightly at the too-close contact but kept his expression under control, holding her just by the waist as he waited for Yoona to pull her face back again from where she hid under the crook of his neck.

She smelled nice today, as usual. And while his heart thrummed against his chest in a faster-than-normal rate, he let himself enjoy this moment as a man—and not as a pretend boyfriend. He didn’t even want to think about that.

Finally Yoona pulled back to face him, her face splotchy in a way that made him cringe in worry. He was just about to set her down on her feet when she spoke, her tone lilting as she directed her words to Sooyoung instead of him,

“You won’t mind if my lips happen to attach themselves again onto your brother’s for a really long time, will you?”

Changmin’s jaw dropped in shock and he looked to his sister for—anything. Sooyoung was no help, however, as she simply shrugged and waved her hand nonchalantly. “Go ahead… just keep it PG, okay? I’d go blind if I ever see my brother getting it on in front of me.”

Yoona laughed and pressed a kiss on his cheek, catching him off guard with the simplicity of the action. He shut his mouth promptly as she looked at him head on, her eyes swimming with some unknown emotion he wasn’t sure he wanted to decipher.

“I can’t promise anything.” She said to Sooyoung, softer this time as she moved to cup his cheek with her palm.

His gaze narrowed into her soft pink lips drawing closer than ever and he pulled back to search her eyes. She only smiled at him in response—and when their lips touched in that moment, Changmin could not help the soft groan from erupting at the back of his throat. The sound barely registered to anyone’s ears, though it had with his but he only held on tighter, hooking one around her waist as his free hand reached over to skim the softness of her cheek.

They talked about giving each other signals before any of _this_ , but it seemed useless now.

Not that Changmin minded at all. As long as Yoona initiated it, he didn’t mind if he was caught off guard again.

They separated slowly moments—minutes—later, their eyes opening at the same time as they tried to catch their breaths. Yoona’s eyes held a hazy quality to them for a second before abruptly clearing at the realization of her actions. She stiffened in his arms, mouth hanging open to speak—only to be cut off as Changmin kissed her soundlessly again as he set her down onto her feet.

She could tell that he knew what she was doing. He had stopped her from reacting badly in front of Sooyoung. Never mind that it was her who had latched herself onto him in the first place—he keeping his end of the bargain by helping her not make a fool of herself.

“Oh my eyes! I am locking myself in the bathroom to vomit!” Sooyoung’s loud complaining pulled her out of her haze, and the couple turned to her with matching sheepish grins on their faces. She made a gagging sound, pointing at their close proximity and shut her eyes. “Where is it anyway?! I can’t take watching you guys like this!”

“Second door to the right.” Yoona replied, laughing despite herself as Sooyoung immediately bolted out of the room, bellowing a “Thanks!” and “Ugh! Ew! Stupid Couples and their hormones!”.

Once sure they were alone, Yoona stepped back from Changmin’s embrace with a meek chuckle. Tucking her hair behind her ear, she tried desperately not to look at him in the eye lest her embarrassment gave her away. It was not an easy feat as seconds later the whiteboard was shoved under her gaze.

/What was _that_ about?/

She wasn’t sure what _that_ was about either to be honest. Why did she feel so happy to see him? Why did she jump and wrap herself around him? Why did she _kiss_ him and liked it?

“I… I don’t know.” She replied lamely, wiping her hands over the back of her jeans. Biting her lip, she stole a glance at Changmin and found that he was unconvinced by her reply but wasn’t going to push her on it either. The thought deflated her a little, though she didn’t know why.

Another thing to add to the growing list of things she didn’t know why she did.

(But she did know she liked it. The kiss. It was different from the one at the party. It was softer, more… spontaneous. She didn’t know why she wanted to kiss him, but she did.)

/Right. Fine, then why are your eyes all puffy?/

Yoona shrugged, pursing her lips. She couldn’t tell him she’d just finished crying from learning about his adoptive family life; that would be wrong on both sides—for her and Sooyoung and also Changmin’s. Instead, she thought up of an excuse and wished he wouldn’t ask anymore.

“We were watching ‘ _A Moment to Remember_ ’ earlier. I started crying halfway through it.”

 _Tch._ Changmin rolled his eyes at this and shook his head. _Figures. She must have felt romantic when she saw and decided to play up the part in front of Sooyoung._ That explanation answered a lot of things and though the awareness of this fact sliced through his chest, he accepted it all the same. He didn’t want to think about the disappointment right now. Or ever.

This relationship was a business transaction. It was all just for play.

/Women and your romantic films./ Changmin wrote, smirking at her and Yoona threw a pillow at his head.

“Shut up.” She replied, sticking her tongue out at him as he easily caught the pillow in his hands.

At the sound of a door closing, Changmin immediately pulled her towards him—making her yelp in surprise. If they were going to be a convincing couple, they had to keep up with the show.

/You can shut me up if you kiss me again, you know./ He wrote, smiling down at her as she read, /We are _that_ kind of couple now, aren’t we?/

Yoona’s eyes narrowed at the words but when she heard Sooyoung groan about food in the distance, it all seemed to click. _Oh._

“What kind of couple?” she asked, pushing down the little sense of disappointment poking at her gut. Their relationship was just for awhile… only until her father needed to see her ‘committed’ to somebody. It wasn’t real.

( _She didn’t want to think about that part now._ )

He looked down at her, watching her face harden in a challenge—catching on to what he was forcing himself to do. Sooyoung entered the room then and complained loudly at the sight of their arms still wrapped around each other before flopping down on the couch in a huff.

/The kind that kiss anytime without signals./ He wrote, stepping away from her. Yoona shook her head, sighing.

If they’d stayed closer together they might have felt their hearts thrum harder and harder in sync. Though only one of them knew why.

“You’re annoying.”

/Keep your hands to yourself then./


	14. Chapter 14

It took him awhile but after hanging out with Changmin for three nights a week for the past month, Eunhyuk felt assured enough to call the quiet man a friend and part of his social circle. He thought it would take him awhile longer to get used to a whiteboard (or in recent days, an iPad) responding to his questions, but when Hyoyeon sat him down to explain everything that had gone on during the weeks he was away in America—about Yoona and her weird arrangement with Changmin—he found that he actually liked this form of communication a lot more than he expected.

In fact, he found Changmin so amusing a friend that he’d actually arranged to meet him for a guy’s night after his date with Hyoyeon during one of their many recent double dates. Their girlfriends were going to be in another deadly shift at the hospital and while Yoona teased Changmin mercilessly about keeping her father company while she was working, he hadn’t particularly been keen on being alone President Im alone again, even though he and the President seemed to like each other enough. So when Eunhyuk invited him to join in on a testosterone filled night-out, he’d agreed immediately and that was that.

The only snag in the plan was that Eunhyuk had completely forgotten about Donghae until the morning after his invitation. It was troublesome, really, knowing the bigger problem with forgetting to invite Donghae too was that his best friend didn’t seem to like Changmin very much. Eunhyuk never wanted to be in any situation where he had to choose between people he cared about. And he especially did not want to come between whatever unspoken rivalry Donghae and Changmin had going, considering how the latter was now ‘dating’ the former’s ex-girlfriend.

Eunhyuk had to chuckle to himself at the thought, just as he wedged himself into a filled elevator going up to his office floor. After hearing the whole story from Hyoyeon, he would have never thought Yoona would go through so much trouble to keep a charade up for her father who probably wouldn’t care if she were really dating a man at the moment or now. He’d been working for the PR firm under President Im’s multi-million company for five years and he’d always regarded Yoona’s father as one of the most open-minded of business men in the world. He was sure that it wouldn’t have been a life-or-death situation if Yoona didn’t end up marrying by the end of the year but the Eunhyuk thought Yoona probably didn’t see things the same way. Already very well through her Medical residency, Yoona was intelligent, stubborn and more than a bit high-strung. She was always so logical, leading her life with her brain rather than her heart. He figured that she must have thought there was an emergency somewhere or she wouldn’t have come up with such an insane charade of a plan.

Being in a relationship was hard enough but pretending to be in one takes the cake. And Eunhyuk wondered if either Yoona or Changmin knew how deep they were already into the pretense. They certainly looked and felt authentic enough to fool the guests at President Im’s party and Donghae. Hell, oftentimes when he got to hang out with the two of them, he was almost fooled into believing it too.

The elevator doors opened to his floor just as he snapped out of his reverie. He was thankful that most of the passengers had gotten out while he was lost in his thoughts—giving him free reign to loosen his muscles before stepping out of the elevator. He was greeted almost immediately by Donghae sitting on his swivel chair, his feet propped up on the desk as though he owned it. Eunhyuk gave him an indignant look before kicking his friend out of his seat and moving to drop his bag underneath his desk.

“What’s up, Lee? What can I do for on this fine day?” Eunhyuk asked brightly, assuming Donghae’s previous position on his chair with a grin. He watched as his friend rolled is eyes at him as he took a seat on the chair near the desk, fiddling with his suit jacket while trying to look relaxed and nonchalant.

Eunhyuk could practically hear the gears running in Donghae’s head as he struggled to articulate the words he wanted to say. _Figures he’d come by sooner or later to ask how I knew Changmin before he did_ , he thought, smirking to himself as his friend opened his mouth and then closed it several times.

Donghae could be dense sometimes. But then his friend was always a little slow when it came to the women in his life. It was just Donghae’s way.

“Anytime during the millennium, dude.” He prodded, a smug grin stretching over his lips as Donghae flushed and flipped him the bird. “Just say what you want to say and let me get to work so that I can actually leave in time to see Hyoyeon for dinner before she goes on her 36-hour shift tonight.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything!” Donghae argued, deflecting any awkwardness and failing miserably as Eunhyuk only gave him a hard and pointed look of disbelief. He swore to himself before finally caving, slumping back against his seat. “I… just wanted to know if you had anything planned after dinner with Hyo. We haven’t hung out in awhile since we got back from New York and I started seeing Sooyeon again.”

“That’s not my fault. We’ve been real busy, closing the deal with DeMarco from New York, and you know… our girls.” Eunhyuk countered, already dreading where this conversation was leading them.

It was just his luck that his best friend would ask to hang out when he’d already made plans with someone else. He felt a little bit like a cheating girlfriend in a sense but he brushed that thought aside, only because it was ridiculous to think of things in that way. He had enough grief from Hyoyeon when she teased about his close friendship with Donghae. He didn’t need to give her anymore insane validation.

Chuckling, Donghae held up his hands in mock surrender. He knew very well that things had gotten out of hand these past few weeks and aimed for a more balanced social life. Sooyeon had encouraged it most of all, especially since she herself was busy with personal matters that he wasn’t very privy to.

Hoping to appease his friend, he grinned and said, “Yeah, well, I’m freeing up my schedule for you now so what do you say? Beer and pool at CS Bar?”

Donghae expected a quick response, coupled with an exuberant high-five before getting kicked out of his friend’s office but what he got instead was an uneasy pause. Eunhyuk looked uncomfortable for a moment before moving to speak—something that unnerved him a lot more than it should.

“I actually already made plans tonight but you could totally come with, if you like.” Eunhyuk said, waving his hang to and fro as though it helped alleviate the awkwardness permeating the mood. Donghae looked at him silently for a moment, unsure.

“Yeah, sure.” He said finally after a too-long moment’s pause, his mind reeling at the fact that his own best friend had failed to inform him that he and his ex-girlfriend’s current boyfriend knew each other enough to hang out. He didn’t want to dwell on how much he felt uneasy over the fact that Yoona had moved on from him so quickly because that would only make him a hypocrite—but he does admit to feeling put out by it.

Seeing Eunhyuk look at him strangely, he quickly put a small smile on his face and added, “I’ll see you guys there then at around 11?”

Eunhyuk looked relieved as he’d agreed and they clapped hands before Donghae took his leave of the office. He wrung out his hands in front of him as he walked away, curling them into fists and releasing them in hopes to relax them. He made it into his own office just a little bit on edge and he heaved a long suffering sigh as he sat down on his desk.

Donghae wasn’t entirely sure what to make of Changmin just yet. But if he were ever to be sure, getting to know him would be the best way to start.

 

* * *

 

“Move it a little more to the right. No! _My right_ , not yours!”

Yoona watched in amusement as Yuri yelled at her brother, shaking her head when Changmin made a face at her. He moved the oversized movie poster of Titanic Yuri had won from a radio show to where she wanted it gently, trying hard not to throw the whole thing down when his sister stomped her foot and complained at how bad he was at taking directions. Yoona had to stifle her laughter a lot during the past hour she’d come to watch them arranging things from her seat inside of their music and video store. Mostly because she knew Changmin would not appreciate it if she guffawed when he almost slipped one too many times during the whole thing.

“I can’t believe I have such a dunce of a brother, can you, Yoona?” Yuri asked out of the blue, snapping Yoona into attention as the younger girl came to sit next to her.

“Well, guys with brawn don’t always get the brains, Yuri.” Yoona answered in a light tone though her voice was loud enough to carry over to where her _business partner_ stood.

Changmin cast them a withering glare before heaving the poster up again and onto the nail he’d set into the wall to keep it up. Yoona wrinkled her nose at him, playfully winking his way—to which he responded with an exaggerated eye-roll, one corner of his mouth lifting just slightly as he struggled to keep from smiling in response.

Yuri watched all of this with a giddy grin, inwardly cheering at the fact that her moody brother finally found someone she liked for him to date. It’d been too long since Changmin had been in such a light mood and she was more than a little grateful for the goodness Yoona brought out on him since they’d starting dating three and a half months ago.

Yuri leaned over and tapped her on the shoulder. “Unnie, I’ve been wondering… when’s your birthday?” She asked when Yoona turned to her with a raised eyebrow, her smile widening as she noted her brother’s ears perk in interest. “I totally saw something in the mall today that I thought would be a perfect gift for you but I didn’t want to seem like an over eager beaver since you and Oppa here haven’t been together very long.”

Yoona laughed at her quick spiel, shaking her head as Yuri practically vibrated in her seat, waiting patiently for her response. She reminded her of Hyoyeon in a way and especially with that mischievous glint in her eye.

“It’s in a few days actually, on the 30th.”

She watched as Yuri counted off fingers in front of her. “But that’s in exactly two days!” she exclaimed, looking incredulous at her and then at her brother as she shifted from looking at both of them at a time. Yuri’s brow furrowed a bit as she suddenly grew quiet, probably weighing the pros and cons in her head before looking up at Yoona with a determined gleam in her eyes.

She immediately shot out of her seat, grabbing her backpack from atop a box of vinyl albums before making a beeline towards the door. “I’ll be back in a few hours. Call me on my cell, oppa!” She shouted over her shoulder before either Yoona or Changmin could protest and was gone in a blur of girlish excitement.

The couple looked at each other then, before Yoona burst out laughing and Changmin hung his head in mock defeat, an amused grin stapled on his lips as he stepped down from the chair he was standing on.

Wiping his hands on the back of his jeans, Changmin tilted his head at her—giving her a look that made her insides start to warm. It was the same look he’d given her when she had jumped him in front of Sooyoung days ago; his eyes staring deep into hers while one side of his lips quirked up in a feral half-smile. It had made her question just how unprofessional their deal had somehow become. Especially after the first kiss they shared in her father’s homecoming party. She had tossed and turned in her bed after that night of hanging out with Sooyoung and even then she couldn’t figure out how to pull explain her actions since their deal had begun. She had tried to find the words when Hyoyeon had cornered her during their hospital shifts but nothing came to mind.

_“Exactly how far are you going to take this, Yoona? I mean, I’m all for a movie-type of kiss or two but are you sure there’s nothing else going on between you two?”_

Yoona hadn’t found an answer to her question then. And now, with Changmin looming over her with his masculine scent and warm eyes, she found herself caring less to find one.

Turning her head once he was exactly an arms’ length away from her, she moved in an effort to hide the blush forming on her face—tucking strands coming free from her ponytail with her hands. “So what are you up to tonight?” she asked nonchalantly, picking up a vinyl album from a box next to her while Changmin hoisted another box onto the table.

She waited as he dusted himself off first before picking up his whiteboard, writing his reply in quick strokes with his pen.

/Hanging out with Eunhyuk at a bar. He bet me that he could beat me at pool for 50 dollars. Who was I to resist easy money?/

Yoona rolled her eyes at him, cuffing him on the shoulder. “Ease up on him, Shim. Eunhyuk’s a delicate flower compared to you.”

Changmin shrugged in retaliation, brushing off the words on the board before writing new ones. He turned to her again in seconds, /What time do you get out of your shift tomorrow?/

“Around noon, but I’m going to go have lunch with my dad at home… why do you ask?”

/No reason./ He wrote, pausing for a moment and then adding, /What would you like for your birthday?/

Yoona felt a new flush erupt on her face at his question and she looked up at him in surprise. “I’ve never really cared much about my birthday so… gifts aren’t really necessary. These past few years I’ve only celebrated with dinner with my father and a casual girls’ night out with Hyoyeon and some other friends.”

/But as your boyfriend, I’m kinda expected to prepare something right?/

“Well, it’s up to you. Donghae never—” She stopped short, shaking her head as Changmin’s brow shot up. Yoona didn’t miss the slight backwards step he took at the mention of her ex’s name but didn’t (couln’t) think any of it as she struggled to paint her meaning across. Yoona reached out to hold his arm, the warmth of her skin adding to his. Their gazes met and held them together as she spoke again,

“My point is… you don’t have to get me anything. Just remember to be sweet, greet me and come over for dinner with my dad.”

Changmin stared at her for a full minute, his dark eyes stormy for a moment before nodding and breaking the connection of their gazes. He quickly moved to pick up some more boxes from the floor as she slid off her seat and mentioned how she had to get going to change for her hospital shift.

/I’ll text you later./ Changmin wrote, pausing at his work to grab her hand and plant a kiss on her forehead after she finished reading his whiteboard.

Her palm tingled as she moved towards the door, turning just so to see him watch her as she spoke to deflect the warring emotions in her chest with a playful response.

“You better, Broody.” She said, ducking out the door as Changmin smirked at her.

If there was any other moment to add to her growing lists of ‘Reasons Why this Deal with Changmin is No Longer Professional’—Yoona knew that _this moment_ would be it.


	15. Chapter 15

_“I like you. I’m not supposed to but I do. Isn’t that so” —_ hiccups _— “so sad?”…_

Yoona should have known something was amiss when she found herself opening her eyes to the bright morning light under crisp and downy white sheets.

It wasn’t that she wasn’t comfortable where she was. There was no pea stuck under the mattress she was lying on (like in the childhood story her mother used to tell); no annoying blare of an alarm clock set to wake her just before the sun rose into the sky (so she could get a head start on a day that would be filled with lab reports and rounds around a ward). It was clear that the sunrise had already passed hours ago and that she’s missed it—but only because it’s been months since she’d last taken a break and when her year-long internship finally ended, Yoona thought there was nothing better than to take a nice long, relaxing nap.

At least, _after_ Hyoyeon’s hell of a celebratory ‘We’re fucking graduating’ and obligatory ‘Yoona finally let me throw her a birthday’ party all rolled into one. The crazy event had gone on well into the night before and for all Yoona knows it was a miracle that she had survived, despite the throbbing hangover, in one piece.

Yoona let out a loud sigh as she brought a hand up over her face, squeezing her eyes shut until the wave of nausea from her hangover passed. She wiggled underneath the soft sheets, snuggling into the pillow next to her face and away from the window pouring sunlight in. The scent on the pillowcase comforted her and she buried her nose even further into it for one, two, three seconds too long until she suddenly bolted upright—finally wide awake to pretend that she wasn’t anywhere else but her bedroom.

_“I matter, don’t I?”_

Except she actually wasn’t in her bedroom, God forbid. And since Yoona has known her best friend for far too long now to recognize her style and penchant for Egyptian cotton, it was too obvious to note that the dark dray _generic_ cotton sheets she was wrapped around in were _not_ in fact Kim Hyoyeon’s.

“Oh my God!” Yoona gasped, rubbing a hand over her eyes to clear away her sleep-blurred vision, hoping to God that she wasn’t just imagining herself inside a stranger’s _bed_. “Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God…”

The shock and the throbbing headache she was sporting made it hard for her to move, even though all of her insides were twisting in dread. Nervous, she dropped her gaze to her lap—taking in the too-large white shirt she was wearing and how it hung off of one shoulder. She felt around under the sheet and was relieved to note the presence of her panties and a pair of shorts she chose to ignore was not her own.  Then she reached up to inspect her face, noting that her face was bare of makeup and that the top-knot she’d done to her hair for the party had come loose and disheveled around her head. She must have been sober enough the night before to remove the chunk of eye shadow Hyoyeon made her use but still drunk to leave the clumped hairstyle on.

 _I must look like the Frankenstein Monster’s wife,_ Yoona mused, wincing as a splintering wave of pulsations hit her temples.

She closed her eyes, willing for the throbbing to stop before opening her them again and turning to her side. Tip-toeing down the strange but comfy bed, she noticed a rumpled set of sheets on the floor where she stood. Yoona kicked at them, slipping on a pair of fluffy hotel-esque slippers and looking around for her clothes and bag. She spotted her handbag’s strap draped over a chair in the small room and moved towards it—only to stop when she caught something in her peripheral vision.

Yoona turned her head and stared wide-eyed at a Polaroid image of her face stuck on a corkboard. In the picture, she was wearing her scrubs; her nose scrunched up but smiling wide as her arm reached forward. It was a photo taken of her from just a week ago… by _Changmin_.

Except Changmin _wasn’t_ at the party the night before. He had to work construction somewhere south of the city and—

_“Hyoyeon! Yo yo Hyo! Hyoyeon! Kim Hyoyeon! Changmin’s not here!” Yoona whined, pouting as she knocked back the shot Eunhyuk put in front of her. She winced as the alcohol burned down her throat. Hyoyeon laughed at her as she continued her whining, “He’s supposed to be here, that cheapskate! We saw each other just two ago and he wasn’t even that busy but now he is and it’s so unfair!”_

_“Missing your boy?” Eunhyuk teased, laughing as she bristled, “You do, don’t you!”_

_Her cheeks were red from not just the alcohol she consumed. “N-no. No, I don’t. I’d just like all of my friends to be present as I steadily enter the mid-20’s of my life!” Yoona glared at Eunhyuk as he made kissing noises and moved to toss her shoe at him._

_Yoona didn’t get to throw her shoe but she did get to smack him on the head. “Shut up, Monkey!”_

_“Hey!”—_

Her daydreaming halted when her ears picked up the sound of a door opening close to her. Yoona spun around, stopping short and speechless at the sight of her ‘boyfriend’ in question.

 _Dripping wet_ from a shower.

She blinked once.

And _shirtless._

Blinked twice, her gaze unconsciously dipping low—

_In only a towel._

**Um.**

“Oh!” Yoona squeaked, jumping and diving under the covers of the bed she’d just vacated. She heard a shuffle of activity as she burrowed deep into the blankets, shielding her from view. And as she pulled one of the pillows over head in a ridiculous attempt to somehow become invisible, Yoona wished her heart to stop thrumming like a hummingbird’s. She didn’t even have to look at a mirror to know that her face was hot and beet red in embarrassment, but it was even worse knowing that her blushing had less to do with that than what her overt reaction actually meant.

Because shirtless or not, Yoona _doesn’t_ even _like_ Changmin in that way. So she shouldn’t be feeling like a little schoolgirl caught starry-eyed by her crush. He wasn’t really her boyfriend.

 _Their relationship is a business deal_.

He was, **at most** , _just_ a friend.

Her feelings are _completely_ platonic.

Right?

 _Then why won’t your heart stop fluttering?_ Her conscience asked, forcing her to poke her head out of the pillow and blankets. Yoona glanced shyly over her shoulder to find Changmin— _Still shirtless but at least he has underpants now, thank God!_ —staring back at her with a raised eyebrow and an amused smile. She couldn’t help but smile back, even as her cheeks burned hotter. _It’s been happening too many times to be considered as a fluke. You like him! Just admit it!_

 _I DON’T,_ Yoona scolded her conscience as she sat up. He stood motionless where she left him, waiting her out as she took shy and tentative steps away forward. His eyes were warmer than usual and that made her heart skip beats again. _I don’t like him like that_ ; she repeated the words in her head as she gathered her courage, each time sounding weaker and weaker than the last. _I don’t, I don’t, I don’t…_

She dared to look him in the eye again just then and found herself melting in his gaze. Butterflies fluttering incessantly in her stomach, happy and free in a way that meant only one thing.

 _Shit_ , she thought, unable to stop the smile widening on her face. _I_ like _him._  
 

* * *

  
The first thing that comes to Changmin’s mind when Yoona faced him again was this: _She’s unfairly pretty even after a hangover._

The next thought that pops after that is: _Shit, she’s wearing_ my _clothes. Why did Yuri dress her in—_

Hearing her jump and yell caused him to realize the situation they were in and with a cursory glance downwards, Changmin realized why Yoona had dove back into his bed. _I’m_ NAKED. _Standing in front of her in only a towel._ He had to stop himself from laughing out loud at the way she squirmed under his blankets. It was cute, really, how she tried to bury herself under his pillows. The situation was embarrassing, true, but it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. At least not for people supposedly dating like he and Yoona.

And because of that (and the little squeak she made when she peeked out of the covers), Changmin decided not to bother to cover himself further… even though he could have easily. Instead he stood and waited for her to calm down; raising an eyebrow at her and smiling once she sat up fully and looked him in the eye.

His smile widened when she started walking towards him, hands clasped behind her and her cheeks aflame in a pleasant pink. Yoona raised one hand and fluttered her fingers at him in a cute wave, smiling now that she probably realized he wasn’t going to embarrass her.

Changmin turned away from her slightly before coming back, holding up a pair of skinny jeans on one hand while the other gripped his whiteboard. /These pants are Yuri’s. The girls said you wouldn’t want to wear your dress again today since it stunk of alcohol so they put it in the wash and told me to give you these. It should be done in a few hours.../

Yoona looked like she didn’t know what to say, but she accepted the pants with a slight smile and a nod nonetheless. They stood staring at each other, waiting for a long moment before Changmin ducked his head and started writing. He turned to give her his back just as he finished, lifting the board up for her to read.

/I can’t go downstairs for breakfast in just my towel and since you’re kind of in the way of my dresser …/

“Oh.” Yoona glanced down at her feet, feeling her face flush red-hot, and suddenly noticed the row of drawers built into the bed. “Did you want um… pants too?” She asked, glad that her voice didn’t stumble too much as she kneeled down to finger one of the drawer handles. _Of course he wants pants! God, Yoona, what the hell._ She opened one of them once she saw him nod and tried not to blush at how intimate it felt to be browsing through his clothing. _He could just stay shirtless though—Ugh no, shut up brain!_

This was something couples who stayed over each other’s places or lived together did and they were neither of those things. They weren’t even an honest-to-God couple but it sure seemed like her libido didn’t exactly get the memo.

_Oh come on, you know he’s not at all bad-looking. You thought he was handsome the second you laid eyes on him, remember?_

_Not the point here, brain. Please shut up. He needs to get dressed just as much as I need to get out of his…_

_Exactly! You’re wearing his clothes. Why don’t you strip off his shirt and offer that to him, huh? That’d be kin—_

_Please. For the love of all that is good and holy. Shut. Up!_

Even while mentally arguing with herself, Yoona selected a soft-looking gray shirt and denim jeans from his clothing and stood up. She exclaimed “Catch!” as she threw it over his head—grateful that he did indeed catch them before turning back around to slip the shorts she was wearing down her legs.

They dressed quickly and efficiently with their backs turned to one another, both very aware of the other. Stealing glances at each other while she buttoned her jeans and he smoothed his shirt down his torso, it took them almost another minute before they faced each other again—their faces both glowing red.

Changmin smirked at her, holding up his board once again: /Good morning./

“Good morning.” Yoona rolled her eyes at him, smiling despite herself and ignoring the flush of affection she felt at seeing him just as shy as she was in this situation. Slowly walking towards him, she turned to face left once she encountered a mirror hanging off the wall next to the bedroom door.

“I look like I’m wearing a sack.” She complained, her fingers playing with the wide bottom hem of the shirt— _his shirt_ —she was wearing. She stared at herself for a moment before pulling the shirt away from her and gathering them into two separate ends. Knotting the hems together at the waist into a simple square knot, the large shirt fit a little better now even though it still hung off of one shoulder.

Yoona caught him raising the board again and rolled her eyes again at what was written there: /Now you look like a disheveled human being wearing a shirt—and _not_ a sack! Bravo./ He was looking at her in that smug but attractive ( _Oh God_ , Yoona thought) way of his that she almost flung herself onto him. Instead, she slapped him on the arm, taking a step back to balance on her heels and play with her fuzzy-slippered feet.

Changmin tapped her shoulder a second later. /You okay?/

“Yeah,” Yoona replied, nodding slightly. She could still see him standing there without his shirt off and felt a shiver course through. It didn’t help that there was still a faint blush on her cheeks that was just not dying down too. Evidence that she was responding non-verbally in ways she shouldn’t. “A little hungover but… fine. Just fine.”

/You look flushed, is all. Like you might have a fever./ Changmin started to reach over to place a hand on her forehead only to have Yoona jump back and away from him. He frowned, unsure of what to make of her reaction.

Less than a minute ago, he had been certain that he had seen attraction brewing in Yoona’s eyes. He’d seen it during the time she made him look for suits to wear for her father’s homecoming party and then after their first kiss. He’d seen it when he picked her up after her hospital duty, when he had danced with her during one of those double dates Hyoyeon insisted they do together, when she was over at the Music store to hang out for a bit before going to class. He’d seen it enough times in the past five months of ‘dating’ to know that she was just as affected by him the way he was with her. And after last night… Changmin had decided that he wasn’t going to talk himself down from showing his affections anymore.

 _That is, unless she keeps on moving away from me when I do._ Changmin thought ruefully, grimacing slightly as he watched her look away from him.

He reached a hand out and tugged at her forearm, bringing her closer to him than usual. Yoona’s eyes widened in surprise at his proximity but said nothing, blinking up at him as he put hands on her shoulders and then up to cup her cheeks. She could smell the spicy scent of his aftershave when he was this close, and like all of the other times before she felt her heart race by his presence.

She had just opened her mouth to speak only to be interrupted by Changmin’s sisters bursting through the door. Their yelling a very cheerful “ _You’re awake!!! Finally!_ ” promptly ended the moment they were having. _Had._ And whatever it could have lead to was instantly cooled over once both Yuri and Sooyoung pulled her out the bedroom door.

If they hadn’t interrupted, Yoona knew that she might have kissed him. That she might have let herself be taken away by the feeling of her _(finally accepted)_ attraction for Changmin and let him know with a kiss. And if he had responded at all, the moment would have led them back to bed and…

Yoona bit her lip, shaking her head off of those thoughts. _It was probably for the best anyway. He couldn’t possibly feel the same way._

She tried not to feel disappointed as she followed the sisters down the stairs, smiling and laughing along with their jokes as she could. She made sure not to falter in her steps or look back at Changmin atop the stairs.

_This isn’t even supposed to be real._


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to my wifey, Yuri.

Donghae stared silently ahead as he waited in his seat. The restaurant he had chosen was almost always filled to the brim every hour, but he was lucky enough to know the owner to get a table without reservation. Jessica had been away for business the past couple of weeks so when she had arrived back into the city, it didn’t take much asking for them to arrange a little lunch date at their favorite restaurant.

He had missed her, goodness knows, just as much as she said she missed him. Having been lost to one another for a decade didn’t lessen the love they felt for one another and so a couple of days absence for work didn’t even make a blip in the grand scheme of things. He loved her, missed her… but admittedly, not so much as he would have cared for in the past couple of days.

Or really, to be specific, he hadn’t missed much (or at all) the night before.

Donghae let out a sigh that was long and wary, unsure of the deep, unsettling feeling gathering in the pit of his stomach. He glanced at his phone for a moment, momentarily cringing at a message notification from Jessica before pressing the little mail icon. The message was short but sweet in the way he knew Jessica could privately be known for: [ _Stuck in traffic. Who knew Seoul could rival New York streets on a bright and sunshine-y day? Be there in a few, love.]_ The wave of love and affection wasn’t new but the apprehension was. And it was exactly _why_ he felt this that was causing him trouble sleeping at night.

He shut the screen off without replying and placed the phone on the table.

… only to pick it up again a minute later, scrolling past apps to choose the Photo Gallery and peruse the images he’d taken from the night before.

They weren’t much. Using a phone’s camera at night never made anyone look good but if by some miracle it did, then it certainly captured Yoona’s beauty last night. Donghae had never doubted how attracted he was to Yoona’s physicality; it was, after all, what had drawn him to her in the first place. It was how strongly he is _still_ attracted ( _and fond_ _of_ ) to her that was the problem. Especially since he had chosen to break it off with her some months ago because he thought it was just _that._

 _And yet, here I am, thinking about my ex when I’d left her to be with my other ex._ Donghae scolded himself; correcting his thoughts at the last minute once the words truly sunk in, _Current girlfriend. Sooyeon isn’t the ex anymore. Yoona is._

It seemed like he would have to start reminding himself of that fact. Because if the last night was any indication of how incredibly stupid he could be to _forget_ how he’d broken Im Yoona’s heart just half a year ago, then it should be plastered all over the city that Lee Donghae is without a doubt the biggest idiot-slash-loser South Korea could ever have gave birth to.

Because an educated man do not go to clubs and party until dawn when he has a beautiful woman waiting for him back home. He doesn’t go alone to a party for his ex-girlfriend and then keeps watch of said ex while she takes one shot after another. A smart man doesn’t get close—too close—to his ex when she throws him a certain smile.

Especially when it’s a smile that isn’t meant for him. At least, not anymore…

_Donghae clinked glasses with her, throwing an arm around her shoulder. The music playing so loud and pounding around them that he has to yell. “Happy Birthday, Yoona!”_

_“Thanks!” Yoona grinned, blinking at her ex. She looked around them, crinkling her brow when she doesn’t find Jessica, or anyone she knows for that matter—not Hyoyeon nor Eunhyuk—close by. “Where’s your girlfriend?”_

_He shrugged, his eyes dimming slightly. Donghae finished his drink in two large gulps before answering her question. “Uh, she had to take care of some things. But she has a present for you. I left it with Hyoyeon.”_

_“Oh! She’s so nice! She’s really nice. I’m glad you chose someone nice after me.” Yoona smiled even wider, tapping his nose with her index finger. She tilted her head slightly to the side, leaning just a bit as she pointed at him to add slyly, “Pretty too. So pretty. Prettier than me!”_

_He laughed loudly, catching her finger into his palm. “You’re pretty too, Yoona. And also_ very _drunk at the moment.”_

_“But you must miss her when she’s not here, right?”_

_Donghae paused for a second to consider her question before nodding slowly, transfixed by the glimmer in her doe eyes._

_Yoona had tipped her head up to catch his nod, her smile turning soft as she regarded him seriously even while tipsy. And after a long moment of being lost in her eyes, Donghae found himself dipper his head down to hers._

_He was a hair breadth away when she pulls away to pout—unperturbed by_ what could have _happened if she hadn’t moved to speak so suddenly. Donghae is left hanging, winded when her words penetrate his consciousness._

_“I miss Changmin.”_

_He wishes then that he wasn’t so sober to feel… angry inside. But when Yoona goes and adds to her statement, still smiling that sweet, soft smile; eyes glazed and wistful, he can’t help but ask for another glass of alcohol._

_“I wish Changmin was here.”_

Donghae barely missed the familiar staccato rhythm of heels when he pulls himself out of his memory of the night before. A forced smile lining his lips as he moved to stand and greet a smiling Jessica as she arrived at their table, her hair long and shiny, her cheeks and lips rosy pink as they are (he knew) soft.

“Hey, honey! I thought you’d be in bed nursing a hangover by the way Eunhyuk went on about how crazy the party last night was when he dropped you off.” Jessica said loudly, tucking a curl of hair behind her ear. She reached over to squeeze his hand when grimaced at her overly chipper tone before moving a palm up to his cheek.

She looked him in the eye, caressing the light stubble on his skin before leaning over to kiss him softly.

“Did you have fun?” She asked, pulling away to look at the menu a waitress dropped off for them and Donghae felt even more awful to force another grin unto his lips.

Jessica is so beautiful and he loves her. But all Donghae saw when she kissed him was Yoona’s face and her soft, _soft_ smile and his mind goes into overdrive.

— _No, I didn’t have fun It was horrible because I think I still have feelings for Yoona I’m so sorry I’ve never wanted to hurt you but I want you both I made a mistake and it’s so wrong I love you but I love her too_ —

 His voice doesn’t crack, but it might as well should have.

“It was fine.”  
 

* * *

  
**[ Hi, this is Im Yoona’s phone. I’m not in right now… actually I’m probably still asleep or buried in exams. Either way I’m busy, so leave a message after the beep! ]**

“Voice mail again!”

Hyoyeon threw herself onto the bed face done, tossing her phone away in the process. Eunhyuk was quick enough to grab it before it tipped off the bed and then sat down beside his girlfriend’s form, letting out a breath as he considered what to do or say next.

She hadn’t slept when they got back from the club and dropping Donghae off at his apartment just past three in the morning. She couldn’t stop fidgeting after Changmin had shown up out of blue and took Yoona with him but Eunhyuk knew the issue was less about her best friend’s pretend boyfriend’s sudden chivalrous rescue (he reminded himself that he would have to talk to Donghae about that later) and more about what said pretend boyfriend did to make such a rescue.

“It’s too early for you to freak out, Hyoyeon.” His tone was soft and placating but Eunhyuk knew his words were enough to make his girlfriend sit up immediately and huff at him. He held up his hands in defense and cut her off before she could yell at him, “There has to be some explanation to why Changmin did what he did and regardless if Yoona or anyone else knows about it or not, it’s really none of our business.”

Hyoyeon knew he had a point but she couldn’t help the irrational rush of anger coursing through her veins. She had twisted in their sheets all night, turning the past few months and last night’s events over and over in her head just to try to find some indication or clue that Changmin could have…

She let out a long huff, folding her arms across her chest as she thought back on the night before. Hyoyeon knew that it wasn’t exactly the most inspired idea for her to throw Yoona a birthday party at a club, but she reasoned that her best friend needed to lighten up her routine more and nothing lightened Yoona up as much as dancing and a good ice-cold glass of rum and coke. She had even managed to convince her to dress up in a lace top, a leather skirt and heels so high Hyoyeon was impressed that Yoona managed to keep her balance for most of the night.

But of course, nothing could ever go smooth-sailing when celebrating your 25th birthday party means having to consume copious amounts of alcohol under your ex-boyfriend’s looming presence while your _current_ boyfriend is a no-show. Yoona told them when she arrived at the club last night that Changmin was running overtime with a construction project he was working part-time at and wouldn’t be able to make it. Her tone had been neutral then, but Hyoyeon could tell that her best friend was a little disappointed and so was the driving force of her immediately pushing a shot into Yoona’s hands.

It was fine for the first hour or two: Yoona was laughing and dancing with her and Eunhyuk, having the time of her life since forever. She hadn’t even minded Donghae’s attendance and was friendly with him instead of awkward or stilted like all the other times before. It concerned her a little to see Donghae and Yoona interacting well, but it wasn’t enough to make her come in between them last night. All Hyoyeon cared about was that she was happy that Yoona was happy so all was good until…

“ _Stupid, mute, asshole. Not even here.” Yoona hiccupped again, belching a little before speaking again, her words disjointed and slurred. “Should be here. More important. Matter.”_

_“Okay, you’ve had enough. Let’s take you home.” Hyoyeon announced, picking her friend up with a huff. Yoona slumped into her, still slurring into her phone and pouting. The boys stood back, laughing while watching the girls struggle to stay upright. The blonde glared at them. “You dicks could help, you know!”_

_“It’s your own fault that she’s this trashed.” Eunhyuk quipped, watching as Donghae stepped forward to take Yoona by the shoulders and held her steady. “You know how easy tequila gets to her if she drinks them in a row.”_

_“I’ll take her home,” Donghae told them, about to turn back only to stop as someone else spoke._

_“No.”_

_The three of them whipped their heads around in total shock (eyes wide and mouths hanging open) as Changmin appeared a few feet from them, his hands deep in his pockets. Ignoring their matching expressions, he crouched in front of Yoona. He wrapped her arms around his neck before standing, hitching her up to grasp her legs around his waist._

_“Changmin?” Yoona whispered sleepily on his shoulder. “You’re here?”_

_He said nothing even as the corner of his lips turned up and she folded herself closer to him, falling asleep almost instantly. Changmin started to walk when Hyoyeon blocked his path, pointing an accusing finger at him._

_“Changmin, you… you just—”_

_He nodded uncertainly, hitching Yoona up higher on his back but said nothing more._

_It took a minute after the couple turned a corner when Eunhyuk suddenly exclaimed, “The mute speaks!”_

_Donghae’s face darkened in concern as Hyoyeon shook her head and corrected her boyfriend._

_“The mute_ spoke _.”_

 _Well, what did I really expect?_ Hyoyeon mused, wincing slightly at the memory of Yoona’s frowning and swaying on her feet. Her friend was obviously upset when she found her screaming at her phone, but it still surprised her to realize how much Yoona had already unconsciously given of herself into this relationship with Changmin.

And the kicker was, after last night, Hyoyeon didn’t think that Yoona was the only one invested in their arrangement at all.

“Babe,” Eunhyuk spoke softly, bringing her attention to him and she knew she must have had a distressed look on her face.

Hyoyeon looked at him in the eye and sighed, “Changmin spoke. He’s not a mute.”

“You told me that he’d admitted as much to Yoona and you before.”

“He did! But that’s not the point here. The point is that he spoke last night, Eunhyuk. When Yoona was too blitzed to realize.”

Eunhyuk stared at her, uncomprehending. Though if she were being honest, she didn’t understand why she was upset about this herself too.

“I’m worried, I guess. Yoona doesn’t need any more drama in her life… and this is a kinda big deal, you know?” Hyoyeon decided to say after a minute of silence, knowing that Eunhyuk knew just what that meant. She took her phone from him and tried Yoona’s cell again, frowning as the voice mail prompt came on again.

“I thought it was a quirk. Like it was a vow of silence he’d decided to do because he’s such a broody guy, you know?” She sighed loudly, trying Yoona’s phone again and getting absolutely no where. “But if he can speak, and he could do it so easily, then what the hell is stopping him?”  
 

* * *

  
It took all of Changmin’s sheer will and patience not to have yelled at his sisters for their despicable timing. But in hindsight, he admitted that their impromptu arrival was a good thing. Yoona had been embarrassed enough to find herself nursing a hangover in his room and wearing his clothes; he wasn’t sure she would be calm enough to accept him kissing her without preamble.

After all, they had agreed to no intimate contact if they were without an audience. And as much as he wanted to put his mouth over hers, he knew that if he was ever going to convince her to consider him and their relationship as more than a transaction between two would-be strangers, then Changmin had to work up to getting that rule abolished.

So he composed himself, taking his time in picking up a white shirt from his drawer and putting it on before bounding downstairs. His sisters and Yoona were eating, sitting around the kitchen counter and talking amongst themselves. His sisters were laughing about something at Yoona, who had her face in her hands and shaking her head. He watched quietly as she pulled back, blushing and looking completely mortified before dissolving into a fit of giggles herself. Changmin wasn’t sure he liked the fact that they paused the second they heard him walking over, giggling still as they gave each other knowing looks.

If he knew his sisters at all, Changmin was sure that whatever it was—it couldn’t have been good.

/What are you girls up to?/ He wrote, flashing the board at them. All three of them shrugged; Sooyoung and Yuri grinning from ear to ear and fighting to contain their laughter while Yoona bit at her lower lip, a blush still staining her cheeks.

“Nothing, bro.” Yuri teased, drawing out the ‘o’ by the end. She looked at Sooyoung’s smug expression and then Yoona’s blushing face before letting out an indelicate snort, promptly sending all three girls into another laughing fit. Changmin could only raise his eyebrow at them and waited patiently until they calmed down before picking up his board again and writing.

/Then what’s so funny?/ Changmin wrote, only to be ignored as they whipped their heads away from him. Blowing out a long, mock-frustrated breath, Changmin started tapping his whiteboard incessantly until Yoona grabbed it from him.

Her eyes glittered as they met his; her previously blushing and mortified look dissolving to an alluringly mischievous expression as she reached over again to grab his pen as well. Yoona then proceeded to draw a cartoon under his question—a poorly drawn caricature of his face, he realized when she wrote the letters ‘CM’ under it—before handing the board back to him.

“That’s what’s funny.” Yoona said simply, sticking her tongue out at him playfully. She grinned as both Sooyoung and Yuri sniggered at their brother’s expense. They sat watching the couple as they stood at opposite ends of the counter, waiting patiently for a reaction they knew was coming.

Setting his board and pen down on the table, Changmin narrowed his eyes at Yoona as he very slowly walked over. “Oh, come on. You can take a joke, right?” Yoona said sweetly, rocking on her heels as he took another step. She looked to her sides, planning her escape before letting out a loud whoop when Changmin almost grabbed her.

Yoona took off instantly, laughing as she headed towards the living area. She stopped once she was at one end of the couch and Changmin was at the other. He feinted left and she followed suit until they were running around the piece of furniture like they were in kindergarten. They did this for a few more times before Yoona held up her hands in surrender, huffing slightly at the exertion of running.

“I give up! I’m still hung over and _still_ hungry and I really don’t wanna run anymore.” Yoona announced, stopping completely in the middle of their chase.

Changmin stopped too, putting his hands on his hips before moving left and right to block her path back into the kitchen. She pouted at him, crossing her arms across her chest after she tried and failed to get around him. By the look on his face, Yoona knew what she had to say for him to move out of her way but the very thought of it had heat flood her cheeks again and made her want to cover her face with her hands.

“ _You’re_ not going to give up until I tell you what we were talking about, huh?” Yoona said finally after he blocked her again, her voice low so that Sooyoung and Yuri wouldn’t hear her—though it was pointless really, considering they had been the ones to tell her about her embarrassing drunken faux pas.

When the sisters brought her down to the kitchen and served her a plate of pancakes and bacon, she didn’t think there could be anything more embarrassing than waking up hung over in her pretend boyfriend’s room. But she had thought too soon and when Sooyoung informed her of a colorful voice message she had left in their home phone and how Changmin had immediately left to come to her aid after she’d left it, Yoona’s mind immediately transported her to the call’s creation.

_She squinted down at her phone, tapping at the screen with a gleeful but inebriated smile on her face. “Changmin! Hey Changmin!” Yoona knew was being loud but she didn’t really notice with the alcohol and happy vibes running through her veins. No one else could have noticed even, especially inside the bass-pumping club so she carried on without care. Yoona half-stumbled out to a spot as secluded as it could get with a number of couples all dipping heads together and doing God-knows-what._

_“You’re supposed to be here. Where are you? This is not part of the deal, Mister!”_

_She giggled, feeling unusually light despite the slight slur her words sported when she spoke into the phone. Hyoyeon once told her she was a happy drunk, but she could never remember. She thought belatedly that this might be another one of those times. But happy drunk or not, Yoona couldn’t help that her grin turned sour suddenly a second later. She stomped her foot for effect though the receiver of the call wouldn’t have seen, half-shouting into the phone._

_“You’re supposed to be pretending to be my boyfriend. How will you pretend to be in love with me if you’re not here?!”_

_She tapped the phone closed. Then opened it again in a flurry of strokes._

_“You’re an asshole. How could carrying cement blocks be more important than me? I matter you know!” She hiccupped a little when she paused, more pensive now than indignant. Sad, rather than angry._

_“And I miss you, you unusually tall asshat! I miss you!”_

It was a split decision to grab at Changmin’s whiteboard when he asked what they were laughing about. Because while Yoona did share the amusement Sooyoung and Yuri had at her calling their brother an asshat, she wasn’t too sure of what to make of the truth her ending note held and what it could have meant to Changmin.

 _Did he even notice?_ She wondered, rocking back on her heels as she and Changmin stood face to face. _Does he even realize how true that call was?_ He was looking at her in that intense way of his again, his eyes peering into the depths of her soul with each second that passed. Yoona let him step closer, his hands dropping his waist to rest tentatively on her hips. It was an intimate motion, one she was inclined to believe was true because his gaze never faltered from hers the way they had every time they were close in public and especially in front of his sisters. She let him tug her an inch closer and tried to disguise the slight shiver his proximity has always seemed to illicit.

“Sooyoung said you got home just as in the middle of my message and then went out the door the second I ended it.” Yoona told him simply, wrapping her arms tighter around her. She waited a beat, staring back at him before she realized that he didn’t have his board on him to write her a reply and she flushed to the roots of her hair. Her cheeks heated up when he acknowledged her words, waiting for her to go on until she barreled on; standing as still as he was while she spoke—Changmin’s warm hands keeping her close by the angles of her hips.

Yoona smiled as she blushed even more, breaking their locked gaze by turning her head. She caught Sooyoung and Yuri watching them with interest out of the corner of her eye. “Apparently you carried me back here on your back and that I was singing the Alphabet song over and over in different singing styles. Yuri was doing my ‘trot’ impression when you came down.”

She said that last bit purposefully louder so that his sisters would hear and when Yuri let out another unladylike snort, the tension between them broke as she and Changmin started laughing as well.

“You should consider becoming a trot singer, Yoona. You _totally_ have a talent for it,” Sooyoung teased, giving the couple an exaggerated wink as they walked back towards the kitchen. Changmin headed towards the stove while Yoona reclaimed her seat around the counter. “I bet Yuri would agree to become your backup singer actually.”

“I _totally_ would,” Yuri agreed, grinning even as she stuffed a strip of bacon she had stolen from Yoona’s plate into her mouth.

“That’s my bacon!” Yoona exclaimed indignantly, mock-glaring at the younger woman as she pulled her plate closer to her body. She ignored the flutter in her stomach when she felt Changmin move behind her, his shirt brushing against her arm. He refilled her plate with fluffy scrambled eggs and a side of bacon, slapping Sooyoung and Yuri’s hands away when both girls reached over at the same time to steal the pieces of meat. She couldn’t contain the wide grin from growing on her face when he silently reprimanded his sisters with a look before filling their own plates with bacon and eggs as well.

Changmin was just dropping off a cup of hot coffee in front of her when he finally noticed the grin on Yoona’s face. He raised both of his eyebrows in question, blinking at her as he stood, his body turned towards her as he carefully sipped his coffee.

“You’re cute.” Yoona said simply, feeding him a forkful of scrambled eggs with a smile. She anticipated the chorus of ‘Aww’ and kissing noises from his sisters when she went back to eating herself, grinning all the while as Changmin stood dumbfounded for a second before catching on to the tone of her voice when she poke and understanding _exactly_ what she meant.

_She thinks I’m cute. She means that._

He smiled back at her, accepting his sisters’ teasing while he drank from his coffee cup again and Yoona continued to clear her breakfast.

_Maybe it won’t be so hard to convince her after all._


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for **Yuri **.****

It’s subtle but everything changed the morning Yoona woke up wrapped in the white downy sheets of her pretend-boyfriend. She doesn’t notice it at first, too busy thinking about what to do now that she was out of school, waiting to graduate and to register for the next National Physicians Exam in a year.

She had decided, even before meeting Changmin, to take a gap year to study and spend as much time with her father as possible. She hadn’t factored in the highs and lows of being in a relationship—even a pretend one had its moments—but it was there, still, wedged between her daddy-and-daughter plans, graduation practices and review hours.

Her father loved knowing that Yoona had a life outside of taking care of him and he told her so every time they found themselves sitting together for meals and leisurely hours. Im Sanghyuk had taken to Changmin as Yoona’s love interest in a way that he never had with Donghae, even though technically he’d known and worked with Donghae much longer. He teased her constantly now whenever she got back from a ‘date’, waiting up for her some nights even though he never used to before. It made Yoona blush bright red whenever her father would give her a knowing look when she summarized her night out with Changmin, but she would take the embarrassment with her head held high if it continued to bring a happy smile on his face.

Something had to be said about Changmin’s surprising ability to create bonds without having to actually speak. And Yoona wasn’t about to complain when it made her father so at ease since his homecoming.

“Do you have plans tonight, dear?” Her father casually asked over breakfast almost a month after her major after-birthday hangover, sipping his chamomile tea as Yoona cut his eggs into small, bite-sized portions. “A _date_ , perhaps?”

“You know when you say it like _that_ it just makes me not want to tell you anything.” Yoona replied, grinning despite her mock-stern tone. Taking a bite from her breakfast sandwich, she tilted her head to the side and met her father’s knowing and expectant gaze head on. Something about the look in his eyes made her suspicious and she couldn’t help but wrinkle her nose and ask him point blank.

“Okay, what do you know, Mr. Im?” She waved her half-eaten sandwich at him threateningly, uncaring of how unladylike (or unhygienic) the gesture was. “Speak or I will make you eat the week-old tofu salad in the fridge!”

“Oh no! Not the tofu!” Her father wailed dramatically, clutching at his heart as though he was really in pain. And if Yoona hadn’t been looking at him, she would have believed that he actually was—if not for the treacherous grin that gave his amusement away.

“You’re hilarious,” Yoona deadpanned, rolling her eyes and staring pointedly at her old man until he stopped playing sick. She grinned at him once he settled back into his seat, spearing his bite-sized portions of egg and eating them with a relish that reminded her of earlier, happier family times. Times when it was just the two of them left to share a breakfast, when her mother used to cut her eggs for her too. The very sight of her father enjoying his simple meal made her simultaneously want to cry and laugh at the same time.

“That was a serious question, Yoona. I really do want to know if you’re going out tonight.”

“And if I wasn’t?” She asked, tilting her head in question.

Her father feigned innocence, shrugging casually as he picked up his tea again to take a hearty sip. “I may have invited a few of my colleagues over for a poker game tonight…”

“Ah, so you want me out of the house so you can drink, huh?”

“It’s not right to withhold liquor during a poker game, darling.” He argued, pointing his fork at her, mock-indignant. “It’ll be utterly cruel of you to ban me from the joy a sip of good scotch can bring. I’ve already nixed the cigars, may I remind you.”

Yoona thought it over in her head before reaching out to pat her father’s hand comfortingly. “Okay,” she said, smirking when his expressed lightened in excitement, “You can have a drink but _only_ a few, alright? And absolutely _no smoking_! I’m going to ask Nurse Yura and Mr. Kang to watch you like a hawk so I better not hear you breaking the rules when I’m not here.”

“Funny. I thought I was the parental figure in this house.” Her father teased, warmly squeezing the hand holding his.

Yoona shrugged. “I’m the one who graduated with the MD though.”

“Ah, but you haven’t graduated!”

“Yet!” Yoona huffed, narrowing her eyes at him before they both dissolved into laughter. “I don’t have plans tonight but I can call Hyoyeon if I have to.”

“What about Changmin?”

She grinned at the inquiring and interested way her father asked about her pretend-boyfriend, tallying another point in Changmin’s favor. “He’s supposed to be working at his construction site tonight. The building where he’s foreman is supposed to add another floor sometime this week so he has to be there to make sure everything runs smoothly.” Her brow furrowed as she tried to recall when it was he’d told her he’d be working late before reeling back and realizing she couldn’t remember. “I haven’t checked with him again since he let me know about it the other night, but I suppose I can call him and ask.”

“You should call him and set a date if he’s free. You’ve already spent enough time with Hyoyeon over the years anyway.”

“Look at you being all ‘progressive’ and ‘open’ dad on me,” she said in mocking manner, grinning when her father raised his eyebrow at her. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so cordial with any of my past boyfriends.”

Her dad laughed at that, shaking his head. “To be fair, you’ve never really introduced any of your boyfriends to me. I’ve always had to hear about them through your sister or Hyoyeon when they set out to tease you.” He fixed her with a playful but knowing look; a look that made Yoona’s cheek burn in embarrassment at the underlying message it projected. “I’m inclined to think that Shim Changmin might mean more to you than you let on.”

“Changmin is…” _A mystery. An incredibly good-looking, stubborn but interesting mystery I’ve been trying to figure out for weeks now. Except I don’t really think I want to figure him out. I like him just fine the way he is._ “He’s different. Definitely not like anyone I ever met or dated. He constantly surprises me.”

“Then I don’t see why couldn’t want to spend more time with him while you’re free.”

Yoona studied her father for a long moment. Her heart stuttered a little at the thought of being alone with Changmin for no reason other than to just be together. Ever since she’d woken up in his bed nursing a monumental hangover the night after her birthday party, Yoona saw Changmin and their arrangement differently. It had been like a curtain over her eyes was thrown wide open and with it came a new, giddy but complicated perspective.

She liked Shim Changmin. Yoona knew that in her heart now. She liked him in a way she thought she’d never care about someone again after Donghae, and then some.

In any case the father-daughter duo don’t speak for the remainder of their breakfast. And when Yoona kisses her father’s cheek goodbye for the day, she doesn’t think too much of the knowing grin he gave her in response. Instead, she focused on getting ready for her day out.

With Changmin. Who was her boyfriend. _Pretend and maybe actually-_ not- _pretend._

Yoona stopped short of the stairs, apprehension dawning on her beautiful features.

“Oh God, what am I going to wear?!”

 

* * *

 

**[ _Hey, Changmin. I feel like going out to the fair today. Feel like accompanying me?_   ]**

Changmin read Yoona’s message again for the umpteenth time over the last hour and still the smile remained stuck on his lips. He knew he was probably already creeping his co-workers out at the café but he’d been feeling pretty damn good over the last few weeks and if people found it weird, then they’d have to live with it awhile longer.

He’d replied to Yoona’s message almost immediately after it arrived on his phone, telling her he’d meet her at the fair after his shift. She said she was looking forward to seeing him minutes later, and if his smile was already stuck before, Changmin was convinced it was likely permanent now.

“You’re looking absolutely chipper today, little brother.”

Changmin felt himself tense at the sound of Jessica Jung’s voice. His posture was rigid as she walked over to the closest table next to him, her heels clicking rhythmically on the floor. She moved in a way that reminded him of typical wealthy socialite characters in dramas his sisters liked to watch; all coiffed and perfectly done up—the best that money could buy. Her light brown hair spilling over her shoulder in perfect waves as she looked him over, her hands tucked under her chin.

The look she gave him reminded him of another, much softer and older woman. A woman with a kinder sparkle in her eye. A woman he’d long since forgotten since his youth.

The other customers inside the café paid them no attention. But if they had, they would have noticed how stifled the atmosphere between the half-siblings had become. A reminder of how far removed they were of each other.

“Have you thought about what I said? About seeing Mama?” Jessica asked when Changmin went back to work, wiping down the other tables surrounding the one she occupied. She wasn’t fazed by his blatant ignorance of her. If nothing else, she’d expected it. “You know it would help a great deal if you did.”

Changmin made a low sound in the back of his throat. Like a scoff or a snort that would have been rude if he’d actually let it out loud.

He finished his work quickly, washing his hands and drying them on his apron, before turning back to give her attention. Jessica saw that he’d swiped his whiteboard from the back room when he’d gone in drop the rag and water spray in its place. The pen was already uncapped as he made his way over to her, slipping easily into a chair.

“You could just talk, you know. I know you can talk.”

Changmin stared at her pointedly while he wrote his response. /No thanks./

“Changmin…”

/Stop./

Jessica frowned as she pressed her palms flat on the table. “Mama didn’t want you to go, Changmin. You know that. Papa was the one who—” She stopped herself from that train of thought, leaning back against her chair. Her arms folded together against her diaphragm. “Right. I suppose I’m not selling this idea to you very well, am I?”

The half-sibling studied each other, mirroring each other’s pose. Spines pressed back into their seats and arms folded firmly against their chests. They looked nothing alike. Having different fathers made sure of that, but there was a glint in their eyes that was inherently the same. And if Changmin didn’t know any better, he would have found it amusing—seeing a part of himself in his sister’s face—but he’s smarter than he lets on so he doesn’t. Not at all.

/I’m not going to that house./ He wrote, going straight to the root of this visit. /I’ve nothing to gain from your family. I haven’t needed to since I was disowned./

Jessica knew she would have flinched if Changmin had spoken the words he wrote. His tone would have been sharp and concise, unyielding like he was right now, still in his seat. The expression on his face brokered no argument of what he truly felt about her family. There was so much disdain smeared on his scowl but little to no bitterness reflected in his eyes. Changmin looked as angry but resigned as he had when they were children and he’d been sent away. Jessica could never forget that tired look on his face.

“I don’t want to fight, Changmin. I know how you feel about my family.” She said softly, mellowing her stance because it was all she could do. “I’m not asking you to come back. Father wouldn’t want you to, but Mama’s dying. She’s dying and she wants to see you again.”

/Take a picture then./

Jessica almost chuckled at that but kept her expressions clear. “That’s not fair, Changmin, and you know it.”

Changmin made a sound that was a cross between a scoff and a snort. It was a loud and intentional and for a moment there, Jessica sat stunned by it. Even knowing he wasn’t truly mute made any form of sound from him seem impossible, especially when he hadn’t felt inclined to speak in almost a decade. Changmin didn’t seem to notice her disorientation, writing in his board even quicker and sloppier than he had before.

/Nothing is ever fair. But I have a right to refuse when I want to, and I refuse to get caught in your family’s web again./

The words bellied his annoyance and Jessica knew it. But she couldn’t stop herself from arguing. It was the wrong thing to say, but she had to voice it out loud.

“We’re _your_ family.”

His eyes flashed with hurt, betrayal and disbelief and it took everything in her not to shrink back at the intensity of the emotions his gaze showed. But then it was over, with Changmin quickly standing up from his chair and stalking away. He grabbed his things from behind the coffee bar on his way out the door, only tilting his head once at a coworker before he rushing out of the café, every line in his stance stiff in controlled rage.

He didn’t look back once. Not that Jessica expected him to. She’d pushed him too far.

She blinked back tears as she watched the door swing shut behind Changmin’s back, ignoring the first two vibrating rings of her phone. Then she finally answered the call, bringing the smart phone to her ear.

“Hi, Mama. No, I didn’t get to see him today. His shift ended earlier than expected. He must have a date or something.” Jessica said as bright as she could muster. Though it wouldn’t make a difference as far as her mother was concerned.

The sky was turning pink now with the setting sun. Another day gone.

“I promise he’ll come home soon though. I promise he will.”

 

* * *

 

Yoona arrived at the gate at the same time as Changmin appears walking around the corner. He had a troubled look about him, she noticed, his posture slightly slumped as he made his way towards the fair’s entrance. He was still wearing his uniform from the café; a black, white-logo t-shirt that stretched quite nicely against his broad shoulders and dark, worn jeans that fit his long frame. And his hair was rumpled in a way that made her think he’d been running his hand through it all day. Just like Yoona wished she could do many time in the last couple of weeks.

Yoona silently cursed her suddenly heated cheeks. She bet they were already flushed bright red in part-embarrassment and affection for the man coming towards her. _Calm down, Im Yoona_ , she chastised, biting her lower lip. She waited for him to find her in the crowd. Shim Changmin always seemed to find her anywhere.

And this time was no different as Changmin’s gait changed as he neared her. Yoona saw how his expression lit up at the sight of her and how his steps quickened. She saw how the worry seemed to melt from every line of his face, making him even more handsome than he already was before. It made her breath catch and her heart skip in her chest.

He was happy to see her. And, Yoona realized, she was happy to see him too.

“Hey,” she said as he closed the distance between them, stopping a foot away from her. She reached up to ruffle his soft hair, blushing as she made it even messier than it already was. “You look good, Shim. It’s nice to see you.”

His eyes crinkled, mismatched, as he grinned down at her, answering her in his own way by the very obvious happy look on his face. _Hello_ , his eyes seemed to say, _It’s good to see you too_. Changmin reached up to smooth tendrils of her hair away from her cheek with the soft press of his hand. His touch whispering _‘You’re beautiful’_ against her skin. She reciprocated his smile with one of her own, entranced as his fingers traced her cheek, gentle and unassuming…

And then, before his touch could disappear from her skin, Yoona moved without thinking.

She cupped his face between her hands and looked deep into his eyes. Whether she found what she was looking for or not was irrelevant because then she pulled him down to her.

Their lips touched and then everything else faded away.


End file.
